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Quote: 7442; Rating: 558; [+|-]
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<F|uke> I like to have sex with Enya playing in the background
<F|uke> Enya doesnt mind it either.,....she just sits, watches and plays |
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Quote: 7443; Rating: 553; [+|-]
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<`]{rAzY]`> My penis is so big that when black men look at it, they say "Hey man, you got a big penis"
<dubdope> krazy... why do you have black men looking at your penis?
<dubdope> plus krazy.. how do they know what your penis looks like when they have you bent over? |
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Quote: 7444; Rating: 6223; [+|-]
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<Paradox> So, guys, I have some news.
<Paradox> I know I usually don't talk much about stuff unless it's solid, but this is interesting, and I think you should know.
<Paradox> I just got an E-mail about an interesting proposition.
* volsung_ perks up.
<Paradox> Apparently, there are lesbians that want my 'hard cock.'
* volsung_ flips Paradox the bird.
<volsung_> :)
<Paradox> They want it 'now,' apparently, so the timetable is somewhat limited.
<volsung_> Are you going to just take their offer as presented, or is there an opportunity for negotiation?
<Paradox> I'm not sure.
<volsung_> I'm sure your hard cock is in great demand.u00a0 An exclusive deal might not be in your best interest.
<Paradox> Last time I got an offer like this, there were some catches. |
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Quote: 7449; Rating: 176; [+|-]
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<iec|brb> k why are my shoes wet?
<Lucid`> iec - cuz i missed yer cheek.... |
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Quote: 7450; Rating: 386; [+|-]
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<@Bojangle> splurge: This one time, my friend called the cops for getting a threatning phone call. SO the cops come over to just see what my friend is like, to judge if he was BSing or not
<@Bojangle> So they come over, and start chatting my friend up, they go, "What do you do?" and he's like, "I'm a computer consultant
<@Bojangle> "Oh yeah, what are ya' working on?" and he's like, "Oh, some webserver"
<@Bojangle> So then these two cops start talking about how he should use another server, and how the server he's using sucks, and how he should set up a database for certain things, lmao
<@splurge> HAHAHA
<@Bojangle> And my friend's like, "What are you, cops or computer programmers?" and he's like, "Oh, I just like to play around in my spare time"
<@Bojangle> It was like something outta Seinfeld
<@splurge> id skullfuck them and leave their corpses in the backyard
<@Bojangle> Me too |
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Quote: 7452; Rating: 425; [+|-]
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*** Now talking in #-[TF]-
*** Topic is '*** Denmark has quit Worldcup (Read error: Connection reset by England)' |
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Quote: 7453; Rating: 401; [+|-]
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<Kefka_> Rap is for people who need to be influenced by a culture of uneducated fools who have primary goals of "ballin" and becoming fly by having a dope ride. |
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Quote: 7454; Rating: 207; [+|-]
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<rwxr-xr-x> i used to have a g/f who turned out to be world writable
<rwxr-xr-x> ridable |
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Quote: 7455; Rating: 149; [+|-]
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<Scire> Yeah well I haven't been IRCing much lately
<E-vangelist> Scire: finally figured out you could masturbate with your other hand, eh? |
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Quote: 7456; Rating: 46; [+|-]
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Ahmed is now known as ahmed_TOP_GUN
<ahmed_TOP_GUN> oh, hmm, i put in the wrong movie ---
ahmed_TOP_GUN is now known as ahmed_THOMAS_CROWN_AFFAIR |
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Quote: 7457; Rating: 229; [+|-]
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<mp> wanna invest in some mp love coupons?
<dev0n> mp: no. i think my mutual fund will perform better :) |
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Quote: 7458; Rating: 44; [+|-]
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<loathe> CF 5 is way way better
<dev0n> way way better than what? a hand job from your mom? |
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Quote: 7459; Rating: 789; [+|-]
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<trimp> indd: go smell your mom's panties
<indd> i cant, she threw them at aerosmith. |
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Quote: 7461; Rating: 369; [+|-]
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<Poltergeist21>I want to fuck the olsen twins right in the ass!!
<Poltergeist21>Dude, my balls goin smack smack smack against their teen asses..yum yum!1
<Charlesowns>Dude, i said that ten years ago! |
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Quote: 7463; Rating: 60; [+|-]
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<tris> why did someone stick an altoid in your cd player?
<furyoujin> tris, we were having phun and he got a lil overexcited |
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Quote: 7464; Rating: 255; [+|-]
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<Poltergeist21> I want to fuck the olsen twins right in the ass!!
<Poltergeist21> Dude, my balls goin smack smack smack against their teen asses..yum yum!1
<Charlesowns> Dude, i said that ten years ago! |
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Quote: 7466; Rating: 323; [+|-]
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<gage> i found a 4x scsi cdrom on the street just now
<gage> i love how often i find hardware on the street
<gage> this was from a mac that looked like it had been beaten with a
sledgehammer |
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Quote: 7467; Rating: 193; [+|-]
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<tris> all the tech contact email is signed "MFN Corporate Communications" now
<tris> maybe they are the ones running the routers
<neruaL> that would imply that a) they were running and b) someone had control
over it |
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Quote: 7469; Rating: 224; [+|-]
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<gage> i drank a beer in the shower today
<christ> dude, you drank a beer in the shower?
<gage> i sho did
<gage> cold beer + hot shower = good
<christ> dude, this is what state OPs is in, we don't have time to drink a
beer like normal people anymore |
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Quote: 7473; Rating: 493; [+|-]
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<@straylight> ARGH
<@straylight> how can the AIM name "shotbybothsides" be taken? WHO THE FUCK WOULD TAKE THAT?
<@straylight> ...
<@straylight> other than me? |
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Quote: 7475; Rating: 306; [+|-]
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<w3nis> this bread smells weird
<w3nis> but tastes fine
<Guilty> Much like a penis |
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Quote: 7476; Rating: 948; [+|-]
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* rax humps Arwen`
<Arwen`> rax: down boy!
* rax humps lower |
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Quote: 7477; Rating: 575; [+|-]
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* terra begins dousing people in gasoline
<hngkong> Terra, why kill us?
<terra> Shush
<terra> it's perfume |
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Quote: 7478; Rating: 230; [+|-]
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[Demon5] ;p
[far_call] what's that symbol supposed to mean?u00a0 "I have a scar on my cheek and I'm a mouth breather"? |
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Quote: 7479; Rating: 330; [+|-]
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<rlorenzon> ...and that's when i knew she was the one
<wolfnip> how did you know that?
<rlorenzon> because...i lost all my friends. |
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Quote: 7483; Rating: 233; [+|-]
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<Chrizto> 6 irc channels, 7 mailing lists, and not a damn thing is going on |
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Quote: 7484; Rating: 257; [+|-]
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<Chrizto> this unix shit is never going to catch on at this rate. |
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Quote: 7485; Rating: 335; [+|-]
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<Chrizto> show me a chick worth worrying about after you're not the one fucking them anymore and I'll show you the value of the imaginary number i |
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Quote: 7486; Rating: 301; [+|-]
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<hopi> let's talk about my need for once
<hopi> er wrong window |
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Quote: 7490; Rating: 324; [+|-]
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<sortof> i slept on a glowstick wrong |
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Quote: 7493; Rating: 1903; [+|-]
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<Cerebus> being bi-polar must suck
<Kender> well yes and no |
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Quote: 7494; Rating: 156; [+|-]
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<Chrizto> I had too much of this hot sauce last night called "scorned woman" |
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Quote: 7495; Rating: 180; [+|-]
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<SkyCriesX> i drooled into my friends eyeball once by mistake while experiencing a strong nitrous hit |
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Quote: 7496; Rating: 367; [+|-]
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<Aura> oh my god
<Aura> i just passed one of thos adult diaper commercials
<Aura> they are trying to make it look sexy
<Aura> they showed this sexy leg with polished nails
<Aura> going into a diaper
<SkyCriesX> thats canada for you |
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Quote: 7497; Rating: 175; [+|-]
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<mild7> its always real nice when you step out of bed and step into wetness |
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Quote: 7498; Rating: 55; [+|-]
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<sort> so would someone on dxm be called detarded? |
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Quote: 7499; Rating: 1418; [+|-]
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<paat> I AM FEELING SOMETHING THAT NO EMOTICON CAN DESCRIBE |
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Quote: 7501; Rating: 124; [+|-]
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<dirtynumbangelboy> SCREW HUMANITY LETS DO MORE NITROUS YAY |
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Quote: 7502; Rating: 28; [+|-]
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<miss_tekky_stylez> yeah
<miss_tekky_stylez> asian shits are dope..
<miss_tekky_stylez> like take for instance
<miss_tekky_stylez> when a big log hits the water
<miss_tekky_stylez> it doesn't make the "bloop" noise..
<miss_tekky_stylez> it goes... "You break you buy!"
<miss_tekky_stylez> or "You have dishonord my family!" |
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Quote: 7503; Rating: 290; [+|-]
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<djfisty> i woke up with samuel l jackson's hairstyle from 'unbreakable' |
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Quote: 7508; Rating: 181; [+|-]
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<Cerebus> ravers don't go to heaven or hell, they go to plurgatoryu00a0 :( |
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Quote: 7509; Rating: 51; [+|-]
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<SkyCriesX> tumors don't cuddle |
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Quote: 7511; Rating: 293; [+|-]
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<orb2k> raves are just an excuse
<jovana> for what?
<orb2k> for grinding my teeth and petting everything |
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Quote: 7513; Rating: 293; [+|-]
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<eth0_tulip> once, i stabbed a guy in LA, for not closing both eyes at the same time when he blinked |
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Quote: 7515; Rating: 424; [+|-]
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<LadyLegs> i'm anal about what goes into my body |
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Quote: 7517; Rating: 228; [+|-]
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<rawkus> fuckin women.
<rawkus> i call for booty and get a lecture on racism
<rawkus> wtf? |
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Quote: 7518; Rating: 216; [+|-]
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<Cerebus> death is the ++ at the end of life |
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Quote: 7519; Rating: 357; [+|-]
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<[Matt]> the only thing about mullholland drive that didn't confuse me entirely was the lesbian sex scenes
<[Matt]> other than that, i was lost |
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Quote: 7520; Rating: 273; [+|-]
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<g33kk0r3> anyone know what carpet bombing is?
<vaportrail> umm...taking a crap on a vagina? |
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Quote: 7523; Rating: 48; [+|-]
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<orbZ> the fuckin taliban took our only good search engine |
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