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Quote: 196311; Rating: 384; [+|-]
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<muffins> Okay, earlier, when I said "FUCK" and left, my grandfather came with a truck load of wood for me to cart someplace. Because "Good Christian Young Men" do things like use chainsaws and cart wood.
<muffins> Another thing Good Christian Young Men do is shoot guns. And go to church. I think I'm failing.
<RedBeard> muffins: so kill two birds with one stone. shoot guns in church.
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Quote: 217123; Rating: 608; |
<Yak|Sleep> One day
<Yak|Sleep> The stupidity of the world will implode on itself
<Yak|Sleep> Taking the universe with it
<Trufant> i shall live on mars by then
<WhiTey-FU> can't wait.
<Yak|Sleep> Congratulations
<Yak|Sleep> You officially are one of those to contribute to the implosion
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Quote: 15571; Rating: -4; [+|-]
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<quarterz> "if you email me, i will kill all your processes. if you telephone me, i will kill all your processes and delete all your files. if you stop by to see me, i will kill all your processes, delete all your files, and remove your account."
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Quote: 8648; Rating: 205; [+|-]
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<hakan> i asked this hot girl out, she said she just wanted to be pen pals
<hakan> and she dropped our class
<dr_rotcod> haha
<hakan> is that a good thing?
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Quote: 4395; Rating: 579; [+|-]
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<Predictable> "Peace, love, and Linux" makes me think of a guy with excessive facial hair in a tiedye t-shirt, shorts, and sandals saying "You can't use that distribution MAN" "You can't like, own an OS, MAN"
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Quote: 42127; Rating: 516; |
<InvisableGuy> you cant get drunk at my place no more
<dope^fish> aw why not?
<InvisableGuy> remember last time? you broke my fucking couch
<dope^fish> hehe shame :) i owned ur couch :0
<InvisableGuy> wel, i owned it, but u broke it.
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Quote: 11720; Rating: 30; |
*** Tem has quit IRC (hmm)
<pot-shit> hah I scared the fuck off
<pot-shit> run to mommy ryan, suckle on her breasts of joy!
<Alice`> I take it you've never seen Temu's mom.
<pot-shit> not her face at least
<pot-shit> normally its covered by a burlap sack
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Quote: 46581; Rating: 206; |
ComNerd1: would you have sex with anybody?
Auto response from KarpenkoSoup: No women, no kids
ComNerd1: oh, ok
KarpenkoSoup: Yeah, those are the rules.
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Quote: 47557; Rating: 104; |
<demonrest> anyone know of a site that would be good to find out if there is a .net activation bypass?
<Jaykul> demonrest?
<Jaykul> you're not asking for warez HERE, are you?
<Daemon> he already got the warez
<Daemon> he needs the crack
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Quote: 616894; Rating: 1628; |
<inspin> so just as I cutting into my pizza, the bell rang
<inspin> It was the little girl from nextdoor, asking where my sister was
<inspin> so I hold up the knife covered in tomatosauce and say in an evil voice "she's not here right now"
<3ll3> LOL
<inspin> so she screams and runs away
<inspin> I felt guitly so I start chasing her saying "I'm sorry"
<inspin> Then her father sees me chasing after his little girl with, what he must have thougt, a bloody knife
<3ll3> I hope he called the cops on you :p
<inspin> well no, but I don't think I'm getting my knife back anytime soon :(
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Quote: 942220; Rating: 1485; |
<BreakneckXan> My sister asked me where Nicaragua was
<BreakneckXan> I said 'central america'
<BreakneckXan> She said "Oh so it's like around Kansas somewhere?"
<BreakneckXan> I see a brass pole and body glitter in her future...
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Quote: 81968; Rating: 0; |
<Virus_the_snafu> What is it with Nazis and burning things?
<Virus_the_snafu> What do you do with Books?--Burn Them! What do you do with Jews?--Burn Them! What do you do with Disabled People?--Burn Them! And Now Homeless?--Hey why not Burn Them!
<Kel> I think it had to do with the German's primitive state of mind.. "hey look! I made fire! lets put it on things and see what happens!!"
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Quote: 9478; Rating: 227; |
<Gothmog> bastard, foiled by my own stupidity
<Gothmog> again
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Quote: 103546; Rating: 753; [+|-]
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<Cody> Hmmm
<Cody> Amazon offers a discount if you buy Adam Smith's Wealth of Nations at the same time as Marx's Communist Manifesto...
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Quote: 5522; Rating: 53; [+|-]
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<lerk> yeah, fat girls are fun sometimes
<lerk> especially doggie style
<fate-> slap em and ride the waves
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Quote: 98046; Rating: 440; |
<ROM_Man> can anyone point me to a resource on how to deal with shadow passwords in perl?
<ROM_Man> anyone alive?
<\mjd> <rattle> Who dares to disturb my eternal rest?
<\mjd> <clank> <clank> <clank>
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Quote: 4140; Rating: 225; |
<uneasier> [ric], a student has to make money.. the pay was good and it wasnt nearly as degrading as you would think
<[ric]> uneasier: I realise, but think how the chickens felt?
<uneasier> they were heavily drugged
<[ric]> I am sure there is some bad joke in this about chickens eating seed, but let's just leave it at that
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Quote: 12746; Rating: 202; |
<ArtyMorty> we kill all the jehovah's witnesses once and for all, either we get some
peace and quiet or we get hit by lightning from a clear sky
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Quote: 106433; Rating: 19; |
* emil is now known as Thalos
* Thalos is now known as thal0s
* thal0s is now known as Thalos
* Thalos is now known as emil
<n00bish> *** emil is now known as SOMEONEWHOCANTDECIDEONANAME
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Quote: 579865; Rating: 1996; |
Skylos : dang its irritating when I get phone calls and they just hang up
Triggur: call them back with caller ID and then hang up!
Triggur: ever get a Heavy-Breathing call?
Triggur: I did once and I told him, "oh god, that is SO hot. can I jack off too?"
Triggur: turns out it was my mom winded from walking upstairs.
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Quote: 145128; Rating: 1773; |
<dArEn> I used to be bad at math, but I did a 360 in that
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Quote: 22301; Rating: 541; |
<maddox> You know what I hate? Programs that pretend like they're sentient beings. Ftp daemons are the worst.. you type "bye" and it responds: "221 bye bye".. or your login fails and you execute a command, it says "log in first, then I might let you do that." Yeah? Well echo "fuck you" > /usr/bin/ftp
<professor> hahaha.
<maddox> "bzip2: I won't write compressed data to a terminal."
<maddox> no, "you" won't write anything because you can't. You're a piece of shit binary written by a lonely programmer who has seen 2001 too many fucking times.
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Quote: 619650; Rating: 773; |
<pokerface> Mac development is OK, so long as you don't mind that your target audience is likely to be you and the three other mac guys.
<TheFeniX_Work> last I checked there were at least 9 Mac gamers out there. Show some respect for the demographic pokerface.
<pokerface> Respect begins with double digits.
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Quote: 60151; Rating: 117; [+|-]
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<DooD> why is it that it's always the biggest, ugliest, burliest men that get gender reassignment surgery?
<DooD> i could see getting surgery if you're like, 5 foot 3 and look kinda like a girl...
<DooD> but all these 6'4" 250 pound men with stubble and a voice deeper than james earl jones going "i feel like a woman trapped in a man's body" ...
<suzu> if you're already feminine cute looking
<suzu> you wouldn't need the surgery
<DooD> suzu: sure you would
<DooD> get rid of the optional material
<suzu> no way
<suzu> cuz the pretty feminine ones
<suzu> would think "i'm so fucking sexy"
<DooD> would think "im so fucking sexy it's ok to have a penis" ?
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Quote: 83663; Rating: 109; |
<Tw1zt1d> I need to do some DDR practice >;\
<Minion> WTF? I always thought DDR was Double Date Rape
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Quote: 374959; Rating: 954; [+|-]
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* grannyman jams a slight tune
<grannyman> just slightly
<grannyman> not quite full-on
<grannyman> just slighty sub-par
<grannyman> but not yet sub-woofer.
<grannyman> or sub-sonic
<grannyman> just kinda like sub-way
<grannyman> you know, like eat fresh all day
<grannyman> BUUU dubba Duuuu dubba Duuu dubba deeeee
<grannyman> SHIIIIIIIIIIINEEEE~~~~~~~~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
<grannyman> dude, I wish i could emulate instruments through IRC.
* grannyman was k-lined by Q (Jesus, I'm a bot, and I can't even take this shit.)
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Quote: 179132; Rating: 1853; |
<KevM> quit the farcical shenanigans you duncical misrepresentation of a homo sapien
<andycode> I find your misanthropic antics most ironic in their malevolent disposition.
<andycode> Moreover, the mere implications of your pathetic facade is illigitimate in its duplicitious atrocity.
<KevM> your virulent discourse is quite misguided in it's underhanded attempts to slight me
<Khross> And you're fat.
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Quote: 102104; Rating: 265; [+|-]
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<|CM|>Mongoose> i'm looking for a girl that enjoys having a bad time
<Paralysis> search for the keyword "gothic"
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Quote: 2589; Rating: 297; |
[Zammo] missee, humans are the only species that do it front on
[Zammo] so over a long time, females evolved boobs
[Zammo] because it matched the attractive effect of a good looking arse
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Quote: 43012; Rating: 657; [+|-]
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<@genutech> you know those trigun dvd rips i was getting
<@genutech> there all dubbed
* @genutech cries
<@animaniac420> thats like wakin up cauz your gilrfriend shit in your bed
<@genutech> dude, ani, you need to learn how to use better metaphors
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Quote: 763160; Rating: 1588; |
<Will T. Rex> So, at the pub last saturday
<Will T. Rex> Really bogan pub, with pool and AC/DC on the TV jukebox, at 3am in the morning... my nerdy friend says very loudly "NEED MOAR BEER!"
<Will T. Rex> with emphasis on the 'moaaar', because we are nerds
<Will T. Rex> ... and out of nowhere, some random dude screams "WE ARE ANNONYMOUS, WE ARE LEGION"
<Will T. Rex> Fucking terrifying
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Quote: 102016; Rating: 863; [+|-]
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<manmanandboyboy> date syllabus check
<d00fus> dinner, movie, then snuggling
<munbty> carnival, cotton candy, and then moonlight stroll
<soccy_pants> drugs, rape, 2 hour police chase
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Quote: 37236; Rating: -63; |
* @Cryogen jumps up and down
<@[4K^Got|AW]> I'm putting it in and stuff
<@[4K^Got|AW]> it's coming VERY soon
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Quote: 659570; Rating: 616; |
<Bobzilla> Curse this hooker website taking so long to load!
<Bobzilla> argh
<K Doc> ...
<Bobzilla> I can feel your judgemental stare
<Bobzilla> It feels good.
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Quote: 111648; Rating: 108; |
(@DarkJedi) i hate when people IM you for no reason
(@DarkJedi) i hate talking about nothing
(+chumpman) unless they are hot girls
(+chumpman) then it's like
(+chumpman) keep talking bitch, and maybe I can get inside your pants
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Quote: 309123; Rating: 576; |
<dDG> Wait... what the hell
<dDG> There's this NASCAR all-star thing on
<dDG> and there is rap for background music
<dDG> NASCAR and rap music...
<wc16> rofl
<dDG> The terrorists have won
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Quote: 43360; Rating: 82; [+|-]
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<Cloud> whenever i try to submit my password, it says my pass is already registered
<Cloud> cant find out whats wrong
<Tranks> /msg nickserv idenitfy <password>
<Cloud> hmmm...
<Cloud> strange
<Cloud> it said it isnt registered
<Cloud> although i keep saying register it
<Cloud> brb, lemme restart mirc
* Cloud has quit IRC
* Cloud has joined #radio
<Cloud> it keeps saying my password is incorrect!
<Cloud> hey it worked
<Cloud> kept typing in <> around my password
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Quote: 7590; Rating: 1163; [+|-]
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*** Signoff: iyeoh (Connection reset by peer)}
*** ieyoh has joined #mpeg3c
<iyeoh> WHO EVER PEER IS...YOU FUCKING LOW LIFE BASTARD MOTHERFUCKER OF A RTEENAGE WANKER, BEND OVER SO YOUR HALF FATHER CAN SCREW YOU IN THE ASS TILL YOUR BUTT OOZES FUCKING BLOOD
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Quote: 91968; Rating: 597; |
<cae> i wonder what sales calls will be like with video phones
<DarthBong> at least then you'll be able to flip them off
<DarthBong> or hang up a porn picture over the camera
<cae> hehe...print out goatse.cx pictures and flash them to unsuspecting sales people
<DarthBong> hehe
<keetz> hahaha
<DarthBong> "hang on a sec, i can't remember where I left my credit card.... Oh, i left it in.. (goatse.cx guy) HERE"
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Quote: 6049; Rating: 894; [+|-]
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red sets mode: +b *!*@*.aol.com
*** creepen12 was kicked by biohzrd (banned: (your 500 free hours will not be spent here./6.05.02))
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Quote: 11602; Rating: 110; |
<lawnhorn> i am a tool
<lawnhorn> i fix therefore i am
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Quote: 124; Rating: 268; |
<FuNGiSiDE> is xxdethxx givin out instructions to make that portable pocket pussy again
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Quote: 39121; Rating: 221; [+|-]
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<tofuhunters> what instruments can you play?
<tofuhunters> i can play the electric guitar
<tofuhunters> bass guitar
<tofuhunters> drums
<tofuhunters> and saxophone
<bobsonfire> i play the radio.
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Quote: 192191; Rating: 538; |
<PoofServ> WOOHOO! My mom is getting off!
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Quote: 153216; Rating: 426; |
(Antti): [Receiving] Colorful_-_08.avi (67.3MB) from Uraschlafen at 1B/s, 22% (15.4MB) done, 89wks 6days 7hrs 45mins 28secs remaining
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Quote: 661256; Rating: 143; |
<steve> oh man
<steve> I was watching this old kung fu movie
<steve> and this crazy japanese dude ripped off this black man's testicles
<steve> and then an evil american white man threw a knife into some other dudes eye
<steve> then the crazy japenese dude whiped his hands off on the black man's pants
<alphakx> sure sounds like kung fu
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Quote: 40800; Rating: 381; |
<Mach17> i haev the firewall up
<@Curator> firewall, what kind?
<Mach17> redhat 7.2 :o
<@Curator> thats a OS you fruitcake
<@Curator> not a firewall
<Mach17> stfu newb
<@Curator> ...
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Quote: 848292; Rating: 170; [+|-]
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<@lysol> is tubgirl a republican?
<jbroome> lysol: yeah, she believes in the trickle down theory
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Quote: 177698; Rating: 1435; |
<Jaayy-EOC> Yeah.. I stole 5$ from Mike when I was at his house, but the funny thing is he doesn't know.
<Derid-EOC> I do now, you dumbass.
<Jaayy-EOC> Shit. When did you log on?
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Quote: 36635; Rating: 25; |
<Inferi0r> sean, hrm, i cant buy "getting laid" on ebay
<Sean> "your search for 'getting laid' returned 0 results, please check later
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