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Quote: 46794; Rating: 266; |
Dr SpaZZo: Simpsons isnt that good anymore
TwilightKnight00: its still good!
Dr SpaZZo: Its just a little sucky, its still good, its still good
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Quote: 31744; Rating: 297; |
<@*****> :( i suck
* @SpeedyPhoenix zips up
<@SpeedyPhoenix> why the sad face? it was good.
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Quote: 23055; Rating: 374; |
<JakeStone> *shift change!*
<geo--> that's a very pretty shift, jake.
<geo--> don't think I've seen you wear that one before.
<JakeStone> thank you geo. I got it at Macy's.
<geo--> the pearls complement it well.
<JakeStone> I'm thinking though, that the tiara is a bit much though.
<geo--> well, only because you're wearing it as a codpiece.
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Quote: 213271; Rating: 143; |
Tiger28070: see, women were just men that stayed in the cold too long
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Quote: 103577; Rating: 419; |
<NMO> MY MONITOR IS FUCKED.
<sheeps> it got lucky ay?
<NMO> Yeah, my subwoofer is such a fucking slut.
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Quote: 62790; Rating: 80; [+|-]
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<FlipTopBx> damnit, last night i fell asleep with my space heater on.
<FlipTopBx> i had three boxes of Cracker Jack, each with the contents fused together into a sort of super-popcorn.
<nitrifik_> neat
<nitrifik_> eat them
<FlipTopBx> heh. that would be the obvious thing to do. i'm not in the process of trying to "thaw" them out.
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Quote: 11229; Rating: 28; [+|-]
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<Bismarck> i recently decided that bsd is dead because it cannot hope to survive when it gives away it's IP with no protections whatsoever.
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Quote: 105168; Rating: 154; [+|-]
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<tuffy> Its hard to prove one isn't a professional litigious bastard while suing someone else for being called that
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Quote: 13325; Rating: 304; |
<Apocalypse23x> dids you noitiuce hitting yourself ehwne drunk dont hurt
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Quote: 665971; Rating: 69; [+|-]
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<Winchester> I just watched a PSA video of how to save ourselves from atomic bombs in the `40s.
<Winchester> And I realized: "Oh, shit, we`re at risk."
<Winchester> And then I watched a video of the Brady kids and I was too happy to care.
<Winchester> Conclusion: The Ruskies used the Brady kids to distract us.
<Winchester> Reason for Failure: The Bradys lacked musical talent and Jan was an emo bitch.
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Quote: 7432; Rating: 740; [+|-]
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<Orz> How old are you jennjenn?
<Orz> 12 right?
<jennjenn> 12??
<Orz> Yeah, comes after 13.
<Orz> Idiot.
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Quote: 433014; Rating: 1242; |
<HouseCookie> What the hell is kwanzaa?
<Tyler> File-sharing for African-Americans.
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Quote: 377745; Rating: -156; [+|-]
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<Moeancurly> i hate wireless internet
<Moeancurly> constant ping tim<eouts
Moeancurly> everytime i reach for my water i get disconnected
<BakerTime361> where'd Moeancurly go?
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Quote: 18397; Rating: 91; |
<Scythewz> my bed makes a nice punching bag
<Zimbu> and at night, Scythewz's bed makes a nice diaper
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Quote: 24956; Rating: 459; |
<D4NG3R0U5> when a girl says 'blow me' what the fuck does she mean
<Ravenouse1> basically, she's telling you to suck her cock
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Quote: 8120; Rating: 458; [+|-]
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<DisposableHero> is semen conductive?
<Iceman> DisposableHero: yes
<DisposableHero> (Iceman): fuck
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Quote: 6994; Rating: 614; [+|-]
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<mgod> weights 300 or something
<mgod> she sez she has a thyroid problem
<bats> um i didn't know nabisco made thyroids
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Quote: 551813; Rating: 2193; [+|-]
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Mike: I had a random thought in the shower just before
Mike: I think I was still half asleep
Mike: if you smacked a kid in the face with a bottle of johnson's no more tears, would it create beautiful irony?
Hopper: ROFL
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Quote: 58970; Rating: 441; [+|-]
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<Mich> do you call a drinking fountain thing a water fountain or a bubbler?
<Mystiq> who the fuck would call it a bubbler
<Mich> it must be a regional thing
<Mich> everyone here says bubbler
<Mystiq> yeah well your state voted bush
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Quote: 205895; Rating: 172; [+|-]
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<auto-jack> one of my users needs to disable their antivirus
<auto-jack> "to run a test."
<Redline> testing their will to be employed
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Quote: 694822; Rating: 560; |
[Sioux]: OMG!
[Sioux]: THAT JOKE IS OLD!!!!!!!!
[Sioux]: It's over 10 years old. I told it to all my friends back in 1991.
[CwR]: Run out of fingers to calculate the exact difference? :)
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Quote: 173334; Rating: 801; [+|-]
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<y2kThug> i worked with a pretty dumb old broad when I was in Stoneham
<y2kThug> she was getting all frustrated one day
<y2kThug> comes to me "I cant print."
<y2kThug> i stare blankly, "Why not?"
<y2kThug> "I dont know, it just wont print!"
<y2kThug> so i said "Maybe it's because you're standing at the fax machine, not the printer."
<Darshu> nate- lol
<y2kThug> oh and then one day her desk phone died
<y2kThug> someone told her to take a phone off of one of the empty desks
<y2kThug> she says "But what about all my voicemails?"
<y2kThug> shaking my head, "Jeanne, your voicemails arent _IN_ your phone."
<Snow> Eh, that's not too dumb. I mean, people interact with answering machines where things are stored in the physical device itself.
<Snow> A distributed phone system is a bit foreign the first time you see one.
<y2kThug> Snow: she fucking sells telecom
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Quote: 124838; Rating: 1115; [+|-]
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<@Firebird> Anyone want the mpeg of the ABC special about pirating movies and tv shows?
<Psy> ...
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Quote: 612687; Rating: 1178; |
<K|O|G|I> -- boss just gave me a list of things to do...
<K|O|G|I> #2) service computers (clean, oil, etc)
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Quote: 151697; Rating: 678; [+|-]
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<arteh|ZzZz> lolly! @ 70s porn site
<Squid0x> I REALLY hope you mean the 1970s
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Quote: 54029; Rating: 353; |
<Torontoye> Hi guys,. i have a P90 24mg Ram,.I would like to make it a gateway,. how much Swap space should i give it??
<afterstep> Torontoye: 24 milligrams of ram?
<afterstep> oh, i'd say about an ounce or so of swap.
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Quote: 608240; Rating: 815; |
cherrybomb1739: why are there hot chicks at church ?
marredduck: why is the good liquor always on the top shelf?
marredduck: the same reason
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Quote: 51239; Rating: 374; [+|-]
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<Jahidi> love is just when two people decide to stalk each other.
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Quote: 4654; Rating: 110; [+|-]
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<Sap> what if i draw a hand on my face and give myself a blowjob?
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Quote: 7547; Rating: 210; |
[Izazael] when ryll dies, we should cremate him and put his ashes in a coffee filter
[Izazael] mmm nescafe goth blend
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Quote: 46315; Rating: 18; |
<@chucky> . <= a map of the world zoomed out alot
<@Diesi|> ha-ha
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Quote: 5272; Rating: 1872; [+|-]
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<django23> I have a stupid question: what does "sendmail" do?
<Epesh> django: you're right, that is pretty stupid
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Quote: 715270; Rating: -247; [+|-]
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Thomas says:
Why do annoying people not realise how fuxing annoying they are, yet are the first ones to complain about stuff :|
Roland says:
ie Thomas
brett says:
I think you have just answered your own question thomas
Thomas says:
sigh
Thomas says:
whats the point
Thomas has left the conversation.
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Quote: 110790; Rating: 64; [+|-]
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<turtletip> a seeing-eye dog was undressing me with its eyes, so I maced him
<turtletip> it got all frantic and ran its owner infront of a moving vehicle
<turtletip> pretty funny
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Quote: 120607; Rating: 500; [+|-]
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<Turbopor> Why did God put men on earth?
<HamNcheese> Because a vibrator can't mow the lawn.
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Quote: 33881; Rating: 70; [+|-]
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<BiBOp> heya
<BiBOp> little question
<BiBOp> what services are best for unreal ?
<Aristotles> funeral services
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Quote: 8282; Rating: 533; |
<sum1tolded2medatvirtrghey> i thought you did music?
<baygledawg> oh i wish
<baygledawg> that would be my second dream job
<sum1tolded2medatvirtrghey> what's your first? professional sperm producer?
<baygledawg> ok, writing music would be my third dream job
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Quote: 481108; Rating: 3080; [+|-]
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<plexiglass> what do u mean? I wasnt even here when they tried to takeover the chan
<haplo> Why can't you just admit that you asked them to take it over!?
<plexiglass> Sheez.. didnt expect the spanish inquisition..
* SpanInqui ([email protected]) has joined #commonsense
<SpanInqui> NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION!!!!
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Quote: 97942; Rating: 235; |
<Dabz> u know i'm currently being paid to sit home reading bash
<FuzzBuzz`> lol
<Dabz> sick pay rules
<Dabz> mind u, i would usually be being paid to sit in work and read bash :/
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Quote: 57084; Rating: 268; |
<Daishi> i cant code though...but its on my list..right above learn klingon and right below get a gf
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Quote: 98419; Rating: 153; |
<Focusyn> hmm this commercial for a local pool place here
<Focusyn> just said "And we make PAYING fun TOO!!!!"
<SJr> Hmmmm
<Focusyn> what, do they let you come in every month and pay your bill in ones in some stripper's panties?
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Quote: 27440; Rating: 511; |
<Wonderboy> so what you're hacking?
<MastaB> im not a hacker, im coder
<Wonderboy> what you're coding?
<MastaB> Hack tools.
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Quote: 46726; Rating: 66; [+|-]
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(sean) OMFG
(sean) dominos came
(sean) and when dominos comes
(sean) sean cums
(BigRo2k2) ok, and what?
(BigRo2k2) ok buddy
(BigRo2k2) you are a little too excited for shitty pizza man
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Quote: 51425; Rating: -3; [+|-]
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<mikaru> thinkgeek.com has some l33t a55 tshirts.
<mikaru> literally/
<autistk> mikaru: dude, I think you'll find they are, in fact, g3y455 shirts
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Quote: 29712; Rating: 764; [+|-]
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<D4NG3R0U5> one time, in my science class, i had this dream...
<daenonok> dude you slept in class?
<D4NG3R0U5> in which my girlfriend (who sat a few seats away) got up, and, on her way over to me took off her top, then got on her knees and unzipped my pants
<D4NG3R0U5> yeah i slept in class, sometimes (when i decided it was time for my medication)
<D4NG3R0U5> and, bc the night before she gave me head irl, the dream was really vivid...woke up, everyone was lookin at me...
<D4NG3R0U5> then the teacher went back on talkin, and everyone turned back around...that haunts me
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Quote: 440309; Rating: 338; |
<Gravit> Poker, beer, and lucky charms. What does that make us? :)
<Roverpup> Irish.
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Quote: 75384; Rating: 278; [+|-]
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<Quoth> i thought MacOS was a breakfast cereal
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Quote: 212627; Rating: 240; [+|-]
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<budb> i find chicks in real life, and they are dating someone else, chicks find me online, and they are bisexual guys
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Quote: 4743; Rating: 361; [+|-]
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<Object> well if a girl can speak of how different men taste and how it relates to their physic I'd say she's pretty much a slut
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