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Quote: 674745; Rating: 480; [+|-]
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<Kansas|Working> I went to the Isle of Wight Once too, there was this guy there who had one leg and was jumping down the street, it was funny, reminded me of a pogo-stick.
<Jochta> Oh, so yuo find disabled people funny?
<Kansas|Working> Only if they remind me of a garden toy. |
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Quote: 674850; Rating: 718; [+|-]
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<drev> how was your weekend?
<LaDyLoVe> amazing! my friends threw a surprise party for my birthday :)
<drev> fuck the closest thing ive ever had to a surprise party was a fucking intervention |
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Quote: 675020; Rating: 565; [+|-]
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<Pseudoof_The_Goat> can somebody help me?
<Pseudoof_The_Goat> i know linux is more secure
<Pseudoof_The_Goat> but i can't run linux because i still need windows
<Pseudoof_The_Goat> i want to install the linux version of firefox on windows
<Pseudoof_The_Goat> anybody know how? |
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Quote: 675073; Rating: 1300; [+|-]
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<chaz> I had to recompile our software to pick up the new libraries etc
<chaz> we then hit an issue with connectivity to the database server
<chaz> but thats what i fixed (i hope) this morning, so we'll see :)
* Twitch crosses her fingers for you
<chaz> my apologies, I didn't realise you were female.
<chaz> I should turn my geek off. :/
<Twitch> I'm in Physics, don't bother |
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Quote: 675097; Rating: 687; [+|-]
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<JaKa> In soviet russia, you must kill a kitten to masturbate |
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Quote: 675105; Rating: 1006; [+|-]
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<kan> the nigerian government has orderd 1,000,000 of those "100 dollar laptops" for its people.
<kan> just what we need more nigerians sending email. |
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Quote: 675122; Rating: 339; [+|-]
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<Falc0> i am gonna start a new bussiness,
<Falc0> skydiving for pedophiles
<Falc0> make em pay in advance cash only |
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Quote: 675190; Rating: 595; [+|-]
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<postlogic> You should -never- go back and look at spur-of-the-moment written code.
<postlogic> It's like watching yourself throw up in replay. |
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Quote: 675378; Rating: 320; [+|-]
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aphextron > Friends are highly overrated.
aphextron > Have you ever once masturbated with a friend?
aphextron > I should hope not, unless itu0092s a girl friend
aphextron > but if that were the case you wouldnu0092t be reading this |
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Quote: 675555; Rating: 849; [+|-]
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<Rjx> i'm a mac
<Rjx> and i'm a pc
<Rjx> and we're both irritating faggots |
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Quote: 675557; Rating: 1059; [+|-]
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<nilson> I have 4.5 gallons of beer
<nilson> for my after prom party
<Advil> that's a lot of beer
<Advil> for two guys |
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Quote: 675691; Rating: 793; [+|-]
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<Swiich> remember how I went to the hospital on tuesday?
<Swiich> I screwed up my liver from chugging an entire bottle of cough syrup to trip
<_nosiop> without reading the label for other active ingredients or checking what they do online?
<Swiich> um...
<Swiich> yeah
<_nosiop> 15 minutes of research could have saved you 15% liver function or more |
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Quote: 675703; Rating: 1888; [+|-]
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<svinx> yknow when you go to a party, and everyones hooked up except one guy and one girl
<svinx> and so they look at each other like.. do we have to?
<svinx> intel & nvidia must be lookin at each other like that right now |
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Quote: 675734; Rating: 1261; [+|-]
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Chris: I hate the way flash slows browsers down
Steve: Try java, that slows it down much better |
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Quote: 675885; Rating: 889; [+|-]
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<D1_> in third grade
<D1_> I saw this girl have a seizure and spasm on the floor
<D1_> and man did her tongue go down her throat
<D1_> now that I think of it
<D1_> it was kind of sexy
<twin> what the FUCK |
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Quote: 676032; Rating: 1194; [+|-]
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<Epic> how are^things?
<Epic> I've been up 48 hours now ;_;
<Dr_Ian> is that why you typoed the space bar as shift and 6? |
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Quote: 676189; Rating: 2814; [+|-]
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Jefferson: FOR SOME REASON MY PASSWORD ON HOTMAIL WON WORK
Mymuffinfatty: do you have caps lock on?
Jefferson: oh
Jefferson: nevermind. |
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Quote: 676384; Rating: 1690; [+|-]
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<PhantomSkyfire> I was practicing with crutches and broke my leg. |
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Quote: 676535; Rating: 1925; [+|-]
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RonilWazlib: man that sucked
RonilWazlib: if your girlfriend tells you she feels fat and hugs you for moral support, do not start jiggling her butt in an attempt to find the natural frequency of fat
RonilWazlib: and if she asks, DO NOT tell her what you are doing |
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Quote: 676621; Rating: 500; [+|-]
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<Cob`Onsite> unfortunately when i leave here, i must go to a church with a 90 year old secretary
<Ridgey_wtf> church? what's that?
<ragtop> its similar to a mental hospital, but with less physical restraints |
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Quote: 676664; Rating: 303; [+|-]
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<cloud1> if warez is too expensive for you, maybe the internet isnt a wise investment for you either |
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Quote: 676711; Rating: 510; [+|-]
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* Fragalot moo's loudly at Naib
<Naib> *BANG*
* Naib goes to have steak |
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Quote: 676781; Rating: 513; [+|-]
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A[S]Vicious: Dude.. I fell asleep last night when I was talking to my girlfriend on the phone.. She was masturbating to my voice, and started talking about how her big vibrator was stuck, and she couldn't get it out.
A[S]Vicious: And I fell asleep..
A[S]Vicious: It was awesome |
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Quote: 676794; Rating: 562; [+|-]
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renol07: yo whats up
renol07: yo what up
renol07: what happen yo click
wryterra: "what happen yo click"? what the hell is that?
wryterra: I'm afraid I don't speak moron. |
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Quote: 676795; Rating: 1036; [+|-]
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neeley_09: I just realized that I'm kind of a rarity on IRC...
diablo: What do you mean?
neeley_09: Well, I actually play aports sometimes, and I do things with people, except in real life
diablo: Hey, not everyone on IRC is a geek
neeley_09: What's the biggest thing you've done today?
diablo: I played Oblivion for a few hours, I guess
neeley_09: ....
neeley_09: You can't even lie about it? |
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Quote: 676796; Rating: 267; [+|-]
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<Osiris_69> we cant be a couple because she wont agree to oral sex before mariage
<Osiris_69> catholic chinese, who is the ass who converted them? im gona kill those fuckers
<AntiZzZ> i dated one of em
<AntiZzZ> she never gave it up in like 8 months
<AntiZzZ> she was rich tho
<Poppet-> damn
<Poppet-> 8 months
<Osiris_69> on the 9th month anti?
<AntiZzZ> we broke up
<_hit> she had a black baby |
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Quote: 676801; Rating: 813; [+|-]
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<tokenshi> does anyone seriously use realplayer anymore?
<mef> yes
<Freddie> I thought they died :o
<RvLeshrac> They're doing extraordinarily well
<tokenshi> i believe i still have an audio clip buffering from 1999 in realplayer |
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Quote: 676803; Rating: 800; [+|-]
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<Keimu> guys
<Keimu> come on lemme back in lol
<Calendros> sorry
<Calendros> You're still banned
<Calendros> come back later
* Keimu ([email protected]) has left #AY.Radio |
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Quote: 676812; Rating: 598; [+|-]
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<mETRo> you shoulda taken it back to walmart lol
<mETRo> they take anything back
<zx2ms> dude serisouly I was read to just throw it away and buy a new one
<zx2ms> instead of go through the hassle
<mETRo> you could bring in a box of used rubbers there
<mETRo> and theyd be like "was there anything wrong with them?"
<[xENo]> just set the kid on the counter
<zx2ms> lol |
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Quote: 676846; Rating: 739; [+|-]
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mintgreenfaerie: rice or ice cream?
OmIn0uS DaRkNeSs: rice cream.
mintgreenfaerie: hehe, sounds like something from Scooby-doo
OmIn0uS DaRkNeSs: no
OmIn0uS DaRkNeSs: that would be
OmIn0uS DaRkNeSs: rice ream
OmIn0uS DaRkNeSs: which sounds like the name for some sick asian porno. |
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Quote: 676873; Rating: 1590; [+|-]
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<LocK> I had a conversation about my penis with 2 girls yesterday
<ezmac> must have been a short conversation...
<ophelia> If they're pointing and laughing, it's not a conversation |
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Quote: 676881; Rating: 77; [+|-]
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* %James|AFK kicks Cruise in the balls..... WAKE UP >.<
<foamy> hah
<bootsector> LOL
<bootsector> What a nice way to wake someone up!
<SilentDragz> I've woken up before with my 9 year old cousin's face about an inch away from mine
<SilentDragz> wait
<SilentDragz> my face, not balls
<SilentDragz> that sounded so wrong
<%James|AFK> lmao
<foamy> freek |
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Quote: 676884; Rating: 1526; [+|-]
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<Chalk> i got a new hard drive and i thought it was fucked cos there was a really weird noise coming from it
<LocK> heh, that sucks
<Chalk> then i realsied there was a crow at my windoe
<Chalk> going raaaaaaaaw
<Chalk> stupid crow |
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Quote: 676896; Rating: 420; [+|-]
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<matt1020> is any 1 smart in hear? |
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Quote: 676902; Rating: 1885; [+|-]
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(&Gsus) thanks to asian porn i know now the japanese words for "More" "oh god yes" "fuck me hard" and "get that tentacle out of my ass" |
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Quote: 677056; Rating: 1254; [+|-]
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<Tyranu[work]> tried to have a customer complaint about a mouse that only worked to the sides and not up and down.... found out later that he didn't move the mouse forward/backwards but rather lifted it up and down... a part of me died that day |
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Quote: 677064; Rating: 459; [+|-]
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<+Ne0v001> I was playing Halo 2 yesterday
<+Ne0v001> my friend was over
<+Ne0v001> and I perfectly jumped 3 obstacles
<+Ne0v001> clicked on my invisibility
<+Ne0v001> and slipped by all the guards
<+Ne0v001> and mumbled
<+Ne0v001> "I don't play this game too much"
<+Ne0v001> and he was like
<+Ne0v001> "Who are you trying to convince? Me or you?" |
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Quote: 677083; Rating: 545; [+|-]
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(%neeley_09) chain letters aren't even trying anymore
(%neeley_09) "You are definately going to die tonight."
(%neeley_09) "So repost this before you do!" |
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Quote: 677113; Rating: 1203; [+|-]
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<scalar> ok, UPS guy came, now I can shower :P
<Keneto> famous phrases to remember not to take out of context? |
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Quote: 677495; Rating: 1008; [+|-]
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Nautilus724: One time I tried to piss off the people at McDonalds by ordering the food in the little Spanish I knew.
Nautilus724: I think that was the first time they didn't screw up my order. |
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Quote: 677737; Rating: 821; [+|-]
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<TheFlibble>Windows XP doesn't like admitting it's made a mistake
<TheFlibble>It doesn't give error messages it just tries to carry on regardless
<TheFlibble>Its like an embarrassed old man sitting in a pool of his own piss. |
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Quote: 678111; Rating: 547; [+|-]
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<Animule> OOkkaayy......
<Animule> HHoowwu00a0 ddoou00a0 yyoouuu00a0 ttuurrnnu00a0 ooffffu00a0 llooccaallu00a0 eecchhoou00a0 iinnu00a0 tthhiissu00a0 tthhiinngg?????? |
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Quote: 678180; Rating: 936; [+|-]
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<Blarrrg> so my CD drive stopped working a couple days ago
<Blarrrg> i figured it must have just been the drivers
<Blarrrg> i looked around but couldn't find any, so i emailed the company requesting them
<Blarrrg> today i go to check my mail, and guess what i find
<Blarrrg> they mailed me a CD with them |
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Quote: 678185; Rating: 256; [+|-]
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<VsX> i had a great idea for a t-shirt, but part of it is trademarked
<VsX> the front will say "hear no evil, see no evil, speak no evil...."
<VsX> and the back will say "but touch and taste it ALL YOU WANT" |
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Quote: 678377; Rating: 352; [+|-]
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<jesusghet> ok IE sucks
<jesusghet> it doesnt support google calendar
<shaan> it does support spyware though |
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Quote: 678420; Rating: 604; [+|-]
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<iMP> my friend just told me a horrible story
<iMP> so, he came to a shop on his bike and left it at the entrance
<iMP> he was inside the shop only for about 5 minutes
<iMP> when he came out, the bike was still there, but obviously something was wrong
<iMP> taking a close look, he noticed the absense of pedals.
<iMP> the country where people steal things they don't need at all just out of boredom has no future :( |
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Quote: 678538; Rating: 237; [+|-]
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<Kojo> Nobody wants to star in my Star Wars porn video :(
<Kojo> The truth behind the scenes:
<Kojo> "Han Shot First" |
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Quote: 678662; Rating: 324; [+|-]
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Metl_AtWork: "Whatever comes out of the resolution must address the root cause," Bush said
Metl_AtWork: I love bush quotes.
Metl_AtWork: he makes me feel smart when I read them.
Metl_AtWork: hes like the John Madden of politics =D |
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Quote: 678684; Rating: 653; [+|-]
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<tydel> this fat chick walked up to me at the club tonight
<tydel> she's like "I like vodka, buy me a drink"
<tydel> I was like "I like blowjobs, buy ME a drink"
<tydel> kind of a conversation ender |
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Quote: 678715; Rating: 1794; [+|-]
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Ben174: fuckin paypal.. they need new databases or something.. seems like every other day i get an email and have to go update my account information. |
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