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Quote: 237400; Rating: 500; [+|-]
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<|TripleH|> so.. where are all the bitches who wanna make me somethin to eat.=P
<epoch--> |TripleH|: they are having a meeting with all the bitches that want to sleep with you
<Elmyra> so far, the room is empty..
<lenoreo> all those folded chairs for nothing...
<Elmyra> but we're still hopeful that SOMEONE will show up. ..
<epoch--> or SOMETHING
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Quote: 237409; Rating: 869; [+|-]
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<Ancalagon> We have here a message from the National Pancake Institute: Fuck Waffles
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Quote: 237410; Rating: 2590; [+|-]
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<foo> Damn, more spam invading my inbox
<Aviator> Nooooobody expects the Spammer's Imposition!
<Aviator> Our two weapons are offshore servers and feeble laws. Feeble laws and offshore servers.
<Aviator> And fake headers. Our THREE weapons are offshore servers, feeble laws and fake headers.
<Aviator> And gulliable horny lamers. Our FOUR weapons are... I'll come in again.
-!- Aviator [dsm@mimas] has quit [Come, Cardinal Bigglesworth!]
-!- Aviator [dsm@mimas] has joined #chat
<foo> Riiiiiight...
* Aviator tortures foo with the comfy V14Gr/ and the soft Debt Consolidation
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Quote: 237483; Rating: 657; [+|-]
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* Zed used to teach idiots how to 'hack' in Diablo.
<Zed> I mean, I'd give them an axe, then lead them to the dungeon.
<Zed> Tell them to hit a skeleton.
<Zed> They didn't appreciate that :p
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Quote: 237507; Rating: 539; [+|-]
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<chobits41> You know that big mall in Edmonton has three fully working submarines.
<chobits41> the Canadain Navy has two.
<@Airs> lol
<chobits41> So if war ever broke out in that mall ... they'd never make it past the Gap.
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Quote: 237811; Rating: 243; [+|-]
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* MoonKatz munches some girl scout cookies.
<MoonKatz> for some reason, these aren't all that great. Maybe it's because I had shortbread recently.
<Da5id> could be that they didn't use fresh girlscouts this year too
<MoonKatz> true. I got them from a different troop, so that must be it.
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Quote: 237903; Rating: 473; [+|-]
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<Tenkz> GG and Riot sitting in a tree
<Tenkz> virtually undressing...ly.
<MrPants> first comes asl
<Tenkz> then comes cyber
<Girl_Gamer_152> then comes meet in real life and IT'S A 60YO TRANSFESTITE!
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Quote: 237904; Rating: 130; [+|-]
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(lara`) i wanna die
(lara`) just like jesus christ
(Ic3zero) whats stopping u
(Ic3zero) ppl cant carry u up the hill?
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Quote: 237913; Rating: 174; [+|-]
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<Penguin> All I did was try to brighten up their days, with racial hate propaganda.
<cow|a> ahhaah
<cow|a> as you should.
<Penguin> And what do they do in return? Ban me!
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Quote: 237941; Rating: 259; [+|-]
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<Fox_Alan> when you have to resort to using pickup lines from bash.org things are bad :)
<Borlath_Mon> Yeah, but nobody I know over here READS bash.org - I read a bit before I go out, and I'm the life of the party. Telling jokes, making fun of things...
<Borlath_Mon> Of course, I -did- get into a bit of trouble when I went to the Black Pride thing.
<Borlath_Mon> That antique farm equipment joke didn't go down too well.
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Quote: 237959; Rating: 329; [+|-]
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(Nero6) I like how you have to be 18 to enter a porno site, but the "you must be 18 to enter" page is covered with nothing but nude women
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Quote: 237965; Rating: 243; [+|-]
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(+^Bunny) without the sex
(@Squiggle) the sex doesnt matter
(+^Bunny) like prison mates :)
(+^Bunny) lol j/k
(@Squiggle) I would SO much rather have someone hold me and play with my hair and snuggle me while I sleep than have sex.
(@Squiggle) sex is irrelevant to me most times.
(+^Bunny) i think a lot of women would ;)
(@Squiggle) Besides, my washing machine has a great spin cycle.
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Quote: 237976; Rating: 1228; [+|-]
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<Monga> Any of you guys ever get stuck in your chair?
<Marjerin> No
<DeeDee> No
<UppeRkilL> No
<Monga> Yeah, uh, me neither.
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Quote: 237985; Rating: 466; [+|-]
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<+IronKite> When will I learn to stop frying bacon in the nude?
<@jaymeekae> shortly after an embarrassing trip to the ER?
<+IronKite> good point.
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Quote: 238023; Rating: 188; [+|-]
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* Arathia serepticously kicks Aytin in the shin
<Arathia> (horribly mispelled)
<Aytin> no, shin is right
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Quote: 238045; Rating: 301; [+|-]
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<javachickn> O FUCK MY FOOT IS ASLEEP
<javachickn> WHAT DO I DO
<javachickn> HURRY
<Steve> wake it up with fire
<Steve> the really hot kind.
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Quote: 238059; Rating: 666; [+|-]
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<LZ> when I was like 8
<LZ> I was trying to make this fanfic
<LZ> where Mario met his twin sister Maria
<Elmoogle> And they sexx0red?
<LZ> I was 8 ;_;
<LZ> Yes
<LZ> They did
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Quote: 238061; Rating: 282; [+|-]
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ZacCichy: or why is it I can't find a chick
ZacCichy: younger than 15!?
ZacCichy: :-(
ZacCichy: OLDER I MEAN
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Quote: 238066; Rating: 818; [+|-]
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<tah_twig> How do you know I'm NOT a hot, slutty girl?
<go_amd_go> because your here
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Quote: 238071; Rating: 347; [+|-]
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<Guest34423> is Microsoft Access available in windows?
<Pinchiukas> no, it's for linux
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Quote: 238103; Rating: 679; [+|-]
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<KB1JEC> anybody here give me a little help with VB?
<MikeJ> KB1JEC - does this look like a VB help channel?
<MikeJ> #C# is the VB help channel
<MikeJ> *duh*
<KB1JEC> ok im so awfully sorry
<KB1JEC> Unable to join #C# because a correct key is required
<MikeJ> ok
<MikeJ> then try #C++ they do it too
<KB1JEC> ok im in #c++, thanks
* KB1JEC has left #VisualBasic
<MikeJ> ...
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Quote: 238107; Rating: 382; [+|-]
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<qreymer> fuck... i just scratched my laptops monitor... and then i tried to use ctrl + z on it
<qreymer> i forgot it doesn't work on the outside ;(
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Quote: 238114; Rating: 236; [+|-]
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<p0m> AGDN: My father's always calling me to explain the toolbar on Word.
<p0m> Its rediculous.
<p0m> "Whats this button do?" "I Don't fucking know! CLIIIIICK IT!"
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Quote: 238133; Rating: 417; [+|-]
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<Gandalf> at least you arent typical of most yanks here who hear the word africa and automatically think we drive elephants to work
<Dinxy> no you drive black people to work
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Quote: 238156; Rating: 473; [+|-]
|
Quension | in other news, I actually had a user read my away message (which was "idle")
Quension | unfortunately, there was a problem
Quension | <crizza> ctc
Quension | <crizza> asl plsssss.
Quension | <crizza> wat's idle
Quension | <crizza> i cant umderstand
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Quote: 238158; Rating: 409; [+|-]
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<birdhouseskater> my one goal in life besides a girlfriend is getting in bash.org
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Quote: 238166; Rating: 507; [+|-]
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* Lemming hands out glasses full of an unidentifiable liquid.
<Lemming> beba la sandwich!
<red_cactus> you blended a sammich?
<red_cactus> *blenderd
<red_cactus> *blendered
<red_cactus> *put a sammich in a blender
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Quote: 238254; Rating: 273; [+|-]
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mooseybaby4247: my acceptance would be like "I would like to thank all the other nominees who lost so that i could win, my family and friends, I love you all, and to everyone I worked with, you were great but I was greater because I'm the one with the award. Thank you."
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Quote: 238256; Rating: 349; [+|-]
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KajiTheGaurdian: Funny thing. There were these papers by kids posted on the wall of the temple about why being Jewish is good, and one kid wrote "I like being Jewish because it means I'm special," but he wrote it as "spechul".
Dolorous Decay: He sounds pretty fucking spechul to me
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Quote: 238276; Rating: 686; [+|-]
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Dublyner: I was up in Winnepeg and some guy on the street asked me if I had two loonies for a toonie. I thought he was going to rape me or something.
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Quote: 238334; Rating: 961; [+|-]
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<Kadon`> Can a dead girl have an orgasm?
<TheMoxy> God.. lol
<Anonymous> How long has she been dead?
<Kadon`> Uh, let me check.
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Quote: 238361; Rating: 166; [+|-]
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<RealaNightmaren> that fucker is linking to our files
<RealaNightmaren> AGAIN
<dosdemon> reala who hosts sonic cult
<RealaNightmaren> dos: a friend of mine
<Sushi-D> reala... you should make one of those scripts..
<dosdemon> ah
<RealaNightmaren> i used to have one
<RealaNightmaren> i replaced it with htaccess
<RealaNightmaren> which unfortunatly doesn't cover the subdomains
<Sushi-D> that bites the bullet...
<Sushi-D> so....how are youe gonna correct this problem...
<RealaNightmaren> easy
<RealaNightmaren> I'll replace it with porn
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Quote: 238410; Rating: 520; [+|-]
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<Schwab> so I bought some mary jane last night
<Schwab> about a quarters worth
<Schwab> then I planted it in this jackass's car
<Schwab> then I called the cops
<Schwab> and now he's on parol violation
<Schwab> lesson in all of this....don't ever..EVER.. fucking touch my food, especially with the intention of ruining it while I'm eating
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Quote: 238425; Rating: 306; [+|-]
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poetica09: i need to think of more ways to make an ass of myself
poetica09: it's fun stuff
poetica09: i was considering going somewhere next weekend
poetica09: and putting up a sign, like maybe outside of a store
poetica09: and a tin can
poetica09: and the sign would say
poetica09: "donate to help a deaf blind man stay alive"
poetica09: and i could be sitting on a lawn chair
poetica09: reading a magazine and listening to my cd player
poetica09: and waving at people who walk by :-p
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Quote: 238448; Rating: 374; [+|-]
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<@iretd> Problem with bash is: after reading it for like half an hour, you go back to irc and you don't understand the jokes ppl make, like "where's the punch line" and then you realize there's no joke, it's just back to boring old IRC
<@dalias> actually i have that problem on bash
<@dalias> i read a quote and i'm like "where's the punch line?"
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Quote: 238461; Rating: 264; [+|-]
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<pussyfart> jesus h. christ..
<mycheese> wtf does the h stand for
<pussyfart> ...
<pussyfart> henry
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Quote: 238463; Rating: 464; [+|-]
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+SharpSchutze: Hard Drive Installed On: Thursday, January 1 1970
+SharpSchutze: That can't be good.
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Quote: 238510; Rating: 930; [+|-]
|
*** Signoff: Froz- (Quit: and /exit were sitting in a park. /exit left, so who was still sitting in the park?)
*** Froz- ([email protected]) has joined channel #mpsource
*** Mode change "+o Froz-" for channel #mpsource by ChanServ
<Froz-> /quit and /exit were sitting in a park. /exit left, so who was still sitting in the park?
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Quote: 238517; Rating: 428; [+|-]
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[SB|Ranter] I played the Sims for 1 hour and realised I was making such an effort to clean the dishes when there's a whole stack of them beside the sink in real life
[SB|Ranter] so I deleted the fucker
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Quote: 238559; Rating: 266; [+|-]
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<DeuceOfHearts> So I'm thinking about buying a title...
<DeuceOfHearts> Should I be an Earl or a Duke?
<DeuceOfHearts> I know... maybe a Marquis?
<mistaelitez> Well, I dunno.... do you scroll down the street?
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Quote: 238603; Rating: 186; [+|-]
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<Azrael> notepad + random windows system files = fun for the bored
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Quote: 238640; Rating: 1350; [+|-]
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<jimmiejaz> http://news.myway.com/odd/article/id/388409|oddlyenough|03-01-2004::10:26|reuters.html
<Jay1> fucking LINK
<Jay1> argh
<Jay1> you made me open it bich
<Jay1> and it opened in my insurance quote windows and fucked it up
<jimmiejaz> deal with it, I didn't tell you to click it.
<Jay1> it opens it self
<jimmiejaz> so links in your IRC window open all by them self?
<Jay1> yes
<jimmiejaz> http://www.tubgirl.com
<Jay1> I HATE YOU
<jimmiejaz> get a real client, one that doesn't open www.tubgirl.com when it sees it.
<jimmiejaz> www.lemonparty.org
<Jay1> U GAY POOF
<Jay1> i HATE YOU
<jimmiejaz> www.lemonparty.org
<Jay1> FUCK SAKE
<-- Jay1 has quit (Client Exiting)
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Quote: 238718; Rating: 249; [+|-]
|
<ShajJee> i am muslim and i never belive on sex
<jackfig> oh, that's good
<Dormir> congrats
<ShajJee> and a muslim can never do sex with anyone
<jackfig> ummm, then why are there so many of them?
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Quote: 238734; Rating: 1224; [+|-]
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<shortigo> I can't find my enlightenment configuration files
<BedMan> look in ~/.enlightenment
<shortigo> I don't seem to have one
<hazard> 'the path to enlightment is hard to find'
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Quote: 238749; Rating: 196; [+|-]
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<Ransome_LightHawk> You know, I heard "The Passion" I so good they are going to make a book about it
<Jaffar> Yeah. I think they're calling it "The Bible" or something
<Jaffar> I dunno, sounds kind of silly to me.
* Ransome_LightHawk nods
<Jaffar> I mean, who'd read a book called "The Bible". Psh.
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Quote: 238766; Rating: 310; [+|-]
|
[ExCal]: hey andre, do you live on welfare?
[ANDrEY]: NOO, BARRINGTON AVE.
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|
Quote: 238771; Rating: 2416; [+|-]
|
Tetramaster3k: Omg.
Tetramaster3k: My mom was just outside my room, and she saw me chewing on the chords to my headphones
Tetramaster3k: She goes
Tetramaster3k: "If you keep doing that, you'll reach wire and electrocute yourself"
Tetramaster3k: So I stopped
Tetramaster3k: Then she goes
Tetramaster3k: "I didn't tell you to stop"
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Quote: 238812; Rating: 745; [+|-]
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<raindog> I'll ring you when I head out...
<morgamic> <3
<raindog> lol
<morgamic> want me to pick you up?
<raindog> nice testicles
<morgamic> it's a heart you jackass.
<raindog> oh
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Quote: 238827; Rating: 307; [+|-]
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<Bobman> Im gonna take the catalytic converter off my car, bend the muffler to the side and rig a spark plug on the inside
<Bobman> Drive-by flamethrower
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Quote: 238837; Rating: 463; [+|-]
|
* @Falco|LAN goes to kick his sister's ass
<@pandairo> heh
<%hurricane> just beat her boyfriend up, its more satisfying
<@pandairo> isnt she too young for boyfriends?
<%hurricane> i dunno how old is she
<@Falco|LAN> she's 12
<@Falco|LAN> well
<@Falco|LAN> I couldn't get her to get off
<%hurricane>....
<%hurricane> please tell me you mean the phone or computer
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