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Quote: 6512; Rating: 255; [+|-]
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<xorg> you know how you hang up the phone after talking to an asshole
<xorg> and you say "Asshole"
<xorg> well
<xorg> in my brain, that has superimposed "goodbye"
<xorg> i talk to that many assholes |
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Quote: 6514; Rating: 253; [+|-]
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<monami> hm, these girls sure are fat
<QJ> where where?
<monami> can you look at pictures of fat naked girls wherever you are?
<QJ> yes
<QJ> it's in my contract |
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Quote: 6515; Rating: 11; [+|-]
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<Debbie_UK> anyway bet you dont even know what Britain is you bigot arsehole
<alex> what's britain???
<xorg> its about 3 fags north of France |
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Quote: 6516; Rating: 837; [+|-]
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<bus> what can I help you with, xorg?
<xorg> well
<xorg> when uncle daddy touches my bathing suit
<xorg> i get all tingly
<xorg> but the bible says NO |
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Quote: 6518; Rating: 1785; [+|-]
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<QJ> your grandma opened the shower door
<QJ> while you were wanking?
<knox> yep
<knox> it was worse than that
<QJ> she finished you off? |
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Quote: 6519; Rating: 2017; [+|-]
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<monami> my boss is okay except for the following scenario that we have to play out four or five times a year :
<monami> Act I
<monami> BOSS: Do A.
<monami> ME: If we do A, B will occur.
<monami> BOSS: I don't care, do it anyways.
<monami> Act II
<monami> BOSS: OH MY GOD, B HAS HAPPENED.
<monami> ME: sigh |
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Quote: 6520; Rating: 319; [+|-]
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<halos> here's the thing about fucking pamela anderson:
<halos> it's been done |
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Quote: 6527; Rating: 158; [+|-]
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<CitizenC> The "P" in "#P-Raves" stands for "get the fuck out of our channel, bitch!" |
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Quote: 6530; Rating: 220; [+|-]
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<Zaph23> I am getting so sick of my underling
<Zaph23> He sucks ass
<Zaph23> Almost every time I come out of my office I catch him web surfing
<biggles> any good sites?
<biggles> i'd be pissed if he was only looking at fatchicksinpartyhats |
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Quote: 6531; Rating: 1087; [+|-]
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<Grumman> I got windows 200pro today.
<shithead1> windows 200? did marcus aurelius use that? |
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Quote: 6534; Rating: 269; [+|-]
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<SD-Washu> ST. LOUIS - A former Southern Baptist Convention president stirred interfaith tumult when he described Muhammad, Islam's revered founder, as a "demon-possessed pedophile." |
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Quote: 6538; Rating: 570; [+|-]
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<_404notfound> Best prank ever: while your male friend is sleeping, slip a condom on him, and get one of your female friends to lie next to him until he wakes up.
<BobTheMilkman> 404: or better yet, a male friend |
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Quote: 6545; Rating: 258; [+|-]
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<Goodlookinguy17> if anyone wants to cyber with a hot 17 year old male, message me
<Owaru> if anyone wants to hear desperate pleas of attention by a decrepit 17 year old weirdo, msg me!
<Owaru> i'll make you sound like you're normal! |
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Quote: 6546; Rating: 504; [+|-]
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<pimpDT> you need a nice phrase to tell women when they mention babies
<boXlor> "stfu" ? |
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Quote: 6547; Rating: 420; [+|-]
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<Soulphonat> My cat only speaks in analog
<Soulphonat> it's cute |
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Quote: 6549; Rating: 194; [+|-]
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* Lemieux doesnt do the menage-a-trois thing
<Lemieux> at least... not if there's 2 women involved
<skidd> so you're a multiple input woman?
* Lemieux is not a porn star
<JayByrd> you don't have to be a porn star
<JayByrd> dirties across the land are getting it at both ends, as we speak |
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Quote: 6552; Rating: 303; [+|-]
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* dagbrown *FINALLY* got licenses for his fucking Sun development environments.
<dagbrown> Sun's licensing department must have the slogan "WE HATE YOU AND WANT YOU TO DIE" |
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Quote: 6556; Rating: 359; [+|-]
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<Yawgatog> If I were two I'd try to eat everything in sight, just in case it's a boob in disguise |
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Quote: 6557; Rating: 272; [+|-]
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<barkode> firewire is the greatest thing since people started taking pictures of other people in thongs. |
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Quote: 6558; Rating: 438; [+|-]
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<zhixel> I'm starting to think I drive too fast.
<felix> nothing wrong with 80mhz.
<felix> unless a highway patrol officer tells you otherwise.
<felix> like one did to me today.
<zhixel> I'm sorry felix, my car isn't a 486.
<barkode> got a ticket?
<felix> i got a speeding ticket going work
<barkode> "sorry officer, i had my soda on the turbo button"
<felix> zhixel: fuck off.u00a0 80mph, too |
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Quote: 6560; Rating: 163; [+|-]
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<mistress> no throw nice laptops against wall.u00a0 p2-233, 192mb ram.
<mistress> (thats his. mine's a p200 with 32mb of ram.
<mistress> maybe his is a 266. i forget. but i remember what video chipset it uses.
<mistress> i guess its up to a girl to know a man's hardware better than he does. |
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Quote: 6562; Rating: 9026; [+|-]
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<skrike> I think the people above me are having sex
<skrike> either that or they're sleeping restlessly and agreeing with each other a lot. |
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Quote: 6563; Rating: 32; [+|-]
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<copernicu> Though it is the fourth largest city in the country, Houston's television market ranks 11th.
<WonkoSane> how does a tv market rank 11th if they're 4th in population?
<CubsWoo> Remember Houston is close to Mexico |
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Quote: 6564; Rating: 656; [+|-]
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<skrike> zhix: guess what Im doing
<zhix> skrike - what?
<skrike> zhix - Im doing the dishes, cuz sometimes thugs gotta tell the dishes whats up
<zhix> skrike - damn straight
<skrike> Im in the kitchen going "bitch you betta get clean" |
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Quote: 6565; Rating: 316; [+|-]
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<barkode> it's all about getting drunk at defcon, and waking up the next morning in a ditch, with a TRS-80, a wireless modem, a
sombero, a pair of high heels, an angry midget and you're dressed like a mariachi. |
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Quote: 6566; Rating: 106; [+|-]
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<goatbustar> the church sex scandal: what would jesus do
<goatbustar> turn the other cheek |
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Quote: 6567; Rating: -168; [+|-]
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(ubergash): i swear to jebus if one more fucking nigger uses the word jew or kyke or the, I'll shank you all |
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Quote: 6569; Rating: 257; [+|-]
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<skullY_> <-- Feels really bright now
<barkode> did you get a new lamp? |
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Quote: 6571; Rating: 540; [+|-]
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<felix> eek
<skrike> felix just screamed like a girl
<felix> no, I said "eek"
<skrike> girls say "eek"
<skrike> YOU GIRL
<oat`meal> guys say "oh SHIT, what the FUCK, BITCH" |
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Quote: 6572; Rating: 513; [+|-]
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(motardo): gay men are more likely to have homosexual sex than straight men |
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Quote: 6575; Rating: 264; [+|-]
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<@_uaioe> BITE THE PILLOW, KID... ITS GOIN' IN DRY! |
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Quote: 6576; Rating: 51; [+|-]
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<NMO> Instuructions to format: rip out hard drive, tie to back of car, drive on shit road, harddrive gone |
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Quote: 6578; Rating: 197; [+|-]
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<sE|PassePartouT`v> i can beat you like sgamer beats off
<sE|PassePartouT`v> and that's a lot
<sgamer> that is a lot, but i doubt you can |
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Quote: 6590; Rating: 450; [+|-]
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<continuum> is there anything sweeter than the first few downloads once you switch to adsl?
<continuum> first sex, first drugs, first drink... don't think any compare to watching 12Mb d/l in like a second or two |
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Quote: 6592; Rating: 69; [+|-]
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<desaster> why get a gf when i have volvo
<montz> yeah a volvo has enuf of holes |
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Quote: 6596; Rating: 50; [+|-]
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<Mr_Bandit> how come when ever i go in the sea it makes me scratch in my private bit |
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Quote: 6601; Rating: 301; [+|-]
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Fred> This computer deserves to go to hell
Max>u00a0 Dont you mean Siliconhell?
Fred> What ?
Max> Its the place where all dead calculators go to
Fred> Really? |
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Quote: 6605; Rating: 142; [+|-]
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<Lewda> no oral pleasure for JOO
<RB> ..
<RB> I do not understand
<Philgone> oh dear
* Philgone motions leeda to the private window |
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Quote: 6607; Rating: 451; [+|-]
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<niff|n> why do you have so much porn Greebo?
<Greebo> 'cos i like masturbating, niffin. |
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Quote: 6611; Rating: 202; [+|-]
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<@meiso> he was trying to secure his server and made the root filesystem un-writeable |
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Quote: 6612; Rating: 109; [+|-]
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<@meiso> ftp: 80921107 bytes received in 87.26Seconds 927.40Kbytes/sec.
<@meiso> man this modem turbo booster really helps |
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Quote: 6613; Rating: 321; [+|-]
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<@arioch> the UT chicks looked too manly for my tastes
<@arftron> serious
<@meiso> wtf she is sexy
<@meiso> her beard is pure ripe for stroking |
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Quote: 6615; Rating: 413; [+|-]
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<@amfeorgmloow> jon do chicks dig the C
<@Jon> amfeorgmloow: they scream preprocessor directives when I take em from behind |
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Quote: 6616; Rating: 465; [+|-]
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<@Jon^D> I used to pop on IRC at 13:37 for the pure novelty of it
<@Jon^D> and I'm not a loser |
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Quote: 6618; Rating: 799; [+|-]
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<Jon^D> I had to cat 8-9 seperate quote files, compare each line in each of them to make sure there weren't any duplicates then sort
<Jon^D> I wrote a nasty perl script to get it donw
<Jon^D> and it didn't work very well
<skank> cat quote*.txt |sort |uniq |
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Quote: 6619; Rating: 249; [+|-]
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<Jon^D> if I was gay and in ireland I'd score with gav
<Jon^D> he's my hero
<Jon^D> he'd probably have to be gay too mind
<arioch> those repressed homosexual tendencies are coming to the surface now
<Jon^D> I wish I was gay |
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Quote: 6622; Rating: 613; [+|-]
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<ScottO> How was your interview, meta?
<nietmeta> it's on monday
<nietmeta> i gotta wait!
<ScottO> How will it be, then?
<nietmeta> it will be awsome
<ScottO> Congrats, then. |
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Quote: 6625; Rating: 178; [+|-]
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<@Greg> how do i start apps automatically when i log into os x?
<@desnarf> hit it with a hammer
<@desnarf> but you need a robot arm for it to happen automatically |
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Quote: 6626; Rating: 480; [+|-]
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<BrantB> OMG!
<CecilPL> what?
<BrantB> I just used an acronym for Oh My God for the first time ever |
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Quote: 6627; Rating: 371; [+|-]
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<CecilPL> I have a life, I just don't do anything in it |
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