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Quote: 5779; Rating: 182; [+|-]
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<dk> im trying out tantric peeing
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Quote: 5782; Rating: 103; [+|-]
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<djm> irc's my anti-drug
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Quote: 5784; Rating: 185; [+|-]
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<onTheReal> evb = fagget?
<evb> onthereal: No, I'm just fabulous.
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Quote: 5785; Rating: 0; [+|-]
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<scar_> what was the fastest vehicle in ww2?
<Hatter> ?
<Hatter> Jet
<Hatter> ww2 saw the first jet engine
<scar_> no, silly
<scar_> a jew on a bicycle through berlin
<Hatter> :\
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Quote: 5786; Rating: 640; [+|-]
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<OneiWilly> i hate games that are always go get the red key
<OneiWilly> open the red door then get the blue key
<delay> yea
<Auger> yeah, i mean, what the fuck
<delay> thats why i didnt play resident evil
<delay> it was horrible like that
<OneiWilly> yea but there were zombies
<delay> I was like "damn i'd hate to live here and have to go to the bathroom"
* delay runs down the hall, grabs the blue gem, opens door one, runs back to get SHIELD EMBLEM makes it to the bathroom door... wets himself
<Auger> no you pee inside the emblem and it opens up a secret passage
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Quote: 5791; Rating: -5; [+|-]
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(skankman) apparently i have tasty jizz
(skankman) i heard paper crumpling in the hallway
(skankman) and i went to check it out
(skankman) and my dog was licking a piece of paper with my jizz on it
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Quote: 5793; Rating: 164; [+|-]
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<]SpIkE[> HELP ME!!! my 120 chipset monitor 17 inch with Gforce 4 doesn't support the internet!
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Quote: 5804; Rating: 581; [+|-]
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<+mirkin> does anybody know if it is possible using ms access to create a report which shows the records of a table
<+mirkin> but shows 3 columns across the page
<+mirkin> i.e
<+mirkin> record 1 record 2 record 3
<+mirkin> record 4 record 5 record 6
<+GoodScrat> That is impossible
<+GoodScrat> Computers are not that far advanced yet
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Quote: 5805; Rating: 236; [+|-]
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<evenpar123> I am so going to be moderated for that last comment...
<mightyflo> console wars are stupid. people that get involved with console wars are even stupidder
<evenpar123> Console wars? I was just giving some information, and making fun of the fact that his parents don't love each other anymore
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Quote: 5808; Rating: 421; [+|-]
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<GreetServ> [A|exander] l44t
<notrino> laat ?
<A|exander> yeah
<A|exander> its one better than l33t
<notrino> err..yeah better than
<notrino> l33t :D
<A|exander> you're getting it
<notrino> than , why not 99 ?
<A|exander> small steps man, small steps
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Quote: 5810; Rating: 307; [+|-]
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<A|exander> i bet aguilera would be as dirty as fuck
<DarthJesus> I dunno'
<DarthJesus> I think she'd be too self involved to want to do anything for you
<A|exander> not if i knocked her unconscious first.
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Quote: 5819; Rating: 239; [+|-]
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[Synoptica] Just when you thought porn spam couldn't stoop any lower...
[Synoptica] 'DOGFART SLUTS!'
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Quote: 5823; Rating: 193; [+|-]
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<mendel> now that I think of it, O'Reilly is to a system administrator
<mendel> as a shoulder length latex glove is to a vetinarian.
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Quote: 5836; Rating: 411; [+|-]
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<PhantomOfTheRouter> never got another call from them till they bought a new accounting package that needed Win95
<PhantomOfTheRouter> and Novell for the servers..
<PhantomOfTheRouter> went in to upgrade the machines..
<PhantomOfTheRouter> moved the first 2 workgroup servers to Novell 4.11
<PhantomOfTheRouter> couldn't find the third
<PhantomOfTheRouter> asked them where they moved it to...
<PhantomOfTheRouter> umm, moved ?
<PhantomOfTheRouter> yeah, where did you move WKG3SRV to ?
<PhantomOfTheRouter> ummm...
<PhantomOfTheRouter> we didn't change anything
<PhantomOfTheRouter> You had to have moved it when you remodelled the office! The wiring closet in the hall is gone...
<PhantomOfTheRouter> oh shit!
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Quote: 5853; Rating: 577; [+|-]
|
<Spooooky> Ever notice how straight guys, when making a "Hell, I'd fuck him" joke always say they'll do the fucking?
<Spooooky> They don't say "I'd take a shot in the eye from him"
<Spooooky> Like it's LESS gay to be the pitcher than the catcher
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Quote: 5856; Rating: 127; [+|-]
|
<charon> <danybear:#bearcave> danybear is a six one, 210 lb, hairy leatherbear in Toronto, 50 years old, 6 uncut
<charon> whatever you do, don't join #bearcave asking for warez
<FishBulb_> charon: uncut means 0-day you tard
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Quote: 5862; Rating: 468; [+|-]
|
<SDHawk> I tried to go to dictionary.com, but I can't spell it right.
|
|
Quote: 5863; Rating: 2860; [+|-]
|
<mp> i am convinced i am a woman
<Oreoboros> mp: Why's that?
<mp> cuz i went to bed bath and beyond for a shower curtain and left with $700 worth of shit
<mp> and i had to go back because i realized after i checked out that i forgot to buy a fucking shower curtain
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Quote: 5869; Rating: 514; [+|-]
|
<Synoptica> holy fuck
<Synoptica> i like
<Synoptica> almost swallowed an aaa battery
<Synoptica> (dont ask)
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|
Quote: 5872; Rating: 629; [+|-]
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<Kuiburetsu> I feel betrayed
<Kuiburetsu> denied
<Kuiburetsu> and... and...
<Kuiburetsu> erm...
<Kuiburetsu> about to be kicked for flooding
*** Kuiburetsu was kicked by Quiby (flood.)
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|
Quote: 5874; Rating: 767; [+|-]
|
<Synoptica> having some major sound issues with gta
<Synoptica> cant think of why either
<bytraper> prolly because your gay
<Synoptica> yeah that's right
<Synoptica> gta has detected that i'm gay and adjusted it's performance accordingly
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Quote: 5876; Rating: 226; [+|-]
|
<straylight> Y'know, I just realized something... why the fuck are we
sending in the NORMAL armed forces against Osama bin Laden? Isn't this
right up GI JOE's alley?
<straylight> I mean, what the hell are we paying THEM for?
<straylight> Hell, the theme song even says "GI JOE is there!"
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Quote: 5883; Rating: 418; [+|-]
|
<illz> "hypothetical ?: your best friend is seeing somebody. shes not around,
he wants to fuck you and comes on to you. do you fuck him?"
<defz> wait
<defz> are you a guy?
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|
Quote: 5885; Rating: 336; [+|-]
|
<splurge> i wish i had amazing powers of telekinesis
<splurge> i would be able to fondle boobies with my MIND!
<purenergy> ya
<purenergy> u can do that now
<purenergy> use ur imagination
<splurge> but i mean, imagine being able to stimulate a girl in a bar
<splurge> just stick a finger of telekinetic force up her spatch
<splurge> wiggle it around
<splurge> vibrate
<splurge> all sorts of crazy shit
<splurge> then get a good grip and gently lead her over to a seat beside you
<splurge> you'd get so much play it wouldn't even be funny
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Quote: 5888; Rating: 715; [+|-]
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<DooD> my stalking skills have left me with her phone number to 100% accuracy.
<DooD> along with her home address.
<DooD> you should always pay the extra $2.00 to keep your phone number unlisted.
<Wronski> maybe she is playing "easy to stalk"
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Quote: 5895; Rating: 75; [+|-]
|
<ackbar> marriage is like buying a car. Its better to lease them and get a new one next year
|
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Quote: 5900; Rating: 203; [+|-]
|
<madvirii> you gotta wake up with a certain "attitude" to face the day and lick some asshole
<CoMBo> yeah or grow up eating some really shitty cooking to acquire a taste for anus
<madvirii> yes anus would be an acquired taste
<madvirii> not something you instinctively put to your mouth
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Quote: 5902; Rating: 771; [+|-]
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<The_Roach> I hear you're pissed.
<A|exander> who told you that
<The_Roach> Anton said you went to the pub.
<A|exander> does it necessarily follow that i'm pissed?
<The_Roach> ...
<The_Roach> Well, yes.
<A|exander> well, it turns out you;'re right
<A|exander> but don't be so presumptious in future
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Quote: 5903; Rating: 147; [+|-]
|
<Gir> Final Fantasy: The Bible Adventure Coming to DVD
<Toen> what the hell is that?
<Gir> hehe
<Toen> "Cecil, deliver baby Moses! Please do not throw him into the water!"
|
|
Quote: 5914; Rating: 131; [+|-]
|
<kriticall> i can fold the $20 to look like two naked chicks
|
|
Quote: 5918; Rating: 443; [+|-]
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<base2> linux people think of windows more times a day than I think of sex
|
|
Quote: 5920; Rating: -18; [+|-]
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[Wz0Ds] hello i want some root i got a lots of CCs (verified) and 2 or 3 virgins /msg me (I HAVE TO VER/RIP FIRST)
|
|
Quote: 5921; Rating: 211; [+|-]
|
[dj-fieX] why is everyone so scared of the y2k? isnt it a kind of jelly or something?
|
|
Quote: 5922; Rating: -7; [+|-]
|
[idlez-] > trik: why doesn't anyone have your pic
[idlez-] [Trik] idlez-, no scanner
[idlez-] [Trik] faggot
[idlez-] > no
[idlez-] > when you scan it
[idlez-] > your hard drive reports bad sectors
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|
Quote: 5923; Rating: 245; [+|-]
|
[mad] WHAT KINDA PRESIDENT DO WE GOT ANYWAYZ
[mad] HE SMOKES WEED AND DONT INHALE
[mad] GETS A BLOW JOB AND DONT CUM
[mad] I MEAN CMON.
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Quote: 5926; Rating: 1; [+|-]
|
<k|aNk> everyone loves phillipino women
<Acidfreak> i prefer tai or chinese women on philipinos
<k|aNk> i heard somewhere philipino women can contort theyre bodies into all kids of positions for sex
<k|aNk> especially when they wear those big hoop earings, theyre good for sticking their ankles through
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Quote: 5927; Rating: 1016; [+|-]
|
<@wickedsun> I dont know the difference between games and reality anymore
<@wickedsun> I jsut used a shotgun on my mother and she's not respawning
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|
Quote: 5934; Rating: 550; [+|-]
|
<FutabaAoi> attractive girls like computers, i carry my case around town because it attracts chicks
<R0SC0E> no, attractive girls think guys that think girls are attracted to guys with computers are cute in a hurt puppy kind of way
<FutabaAoi> dont most people put down hurt puppies?
<FutabaAoi> does that mean attractive girls shoot computer nerds?
<R0SC0E> god i don't mean puppies with like missing limbs or exposed viscerals
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Quote: 5937; Rating: 100; [+|-]
|
<hypr> i rolled once when i saw oakenfold a year ago he played really gay house and 5 trance songs at the end and my e dident even work
<matts> your e didn't work? did you read the manual
|
|
Quote: 5942; Rating: 596; [+|-]
|
<DrWoody> Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves. After marriage, the 'y' becomes silent.
|
|
Quote: 5956; Rating: 1039; [+|-]
|
<@Bojangle> My mom tells me I need to get laid
|
|
Quote: 5967; Rating: 607; [+|-]
|
<ToiletDuk> you're an idiot
<Lucent-H> you have a job!
<Lucent-H> okay, now you tell another lie
|
|
Quote: 5971; Rating: 403; [+|-]
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<Pseudonym> I got my mom addicted to GTA3 by accident ><
|
|
Quote: 5980; Rating: 208; [+|-]
|
[10:11] <meiso> ok guys im loading up mozilla 0.9.1
<meiso> time how long before it crashes
[10:18] <meiso> ok mozilla just crashed
|
|
Quote: 5985; Rating: 3; [+|-]
|
<Foggi> french are good for 2 things
<Foggi> art
<Foggi> and surrendering
|
|
Quote: 5986; Rating: 9; [+|-]
|
<c> remember the 3 most important letters in u'r education isn't abc, but rather ftp
|
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Quote: 5987; Rating: 145; [+|-]
|
<Foggie> i wish i could buy shares in hot women
<Foggie> then i could go to ashley judd and be like "you gotta sleep with me since i own 2% of you"
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|
Quote: 5988; Rating: 259; [+|-]
|
<rmalink> are you feeling any better?
<dep01> no... not really..
<rmalink> you know what it is? allergies...
<dep01> no, you know what it is? the crippling depression..
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Quote: 5990; Rating: 427; [+|-]
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<zer0man> i wish someone told me that having a girlfriend was going to be difficult
<zer0man> or if they told me that, I wish i listened
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Quote: 5995; Rating: 162; [+|-]
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<Fntc> Has jetchan exploded yet?
<JetSki> yes... thank goodness for duct tape
<Fntc> Wow I never thought of using duct tape for masturbation
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