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Quote: 97901; Rating: 183; [+|-]
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<deepspring> well.. my car just passed it's blueslip inspection and I mean just...
<deepspring> the mechanic said that he found plenty of "minor" issues that I would have to fix... luckily he let them slide
<deepspring> minor oil leak from the automatic transmission
<deepspring> bad hatch alignment
<deepspring> one of my driving lights (little halogen addon ones) was buggered
<LrdShaper> bad driver behind wheel
<deepspring> my ignition key can drop out of the ignition while the engine is running
<LrdShaper> right front wheel held on by masking tape
<LrdShaper> but the cathodes and led fans are what made himover look the problems |
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Quote: 97911; Rating: 224; [+|-]
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:::: Now in #bearcave
* martraci slowly leaves; back against the wall |
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Quote: 97923; Rating: 546; [+|-]
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<ChangWufei> it was well funny when we all went in a gay bar, they all just stared at us
<ChangWufei> hehe
<loveya> u went in a gay bar???
<ChangWufei> yeah, we didnt realise at first
<astrotrain> what... that you were gay? |
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Quote: 97927; Rating: 141; [+|-]
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<Gav> Freshly reinstalled computers are a bit like a pair of new shoes - you're happy that you've finally got a new pair, but they're awkward to use for a little while :-) |
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Quote: 97931; Rating: 111; [+|-]
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<RugNug> naw......just reboot
<crak_pipe> that works
<RugNug> and fantasize about keeping the inventer of popups in my basement for a coupla years
<crak_pipe> hell yah
<crak_pipe> lemme beat on him for a bit as well
<RugNug> heheheh......i could make millions......with a cover charge |
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Quote: 97934; Rating: 132; [+|-]
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<Nush> im not racist, i had black friends, but my dad sold them all |
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Quote: 97939; Rating: 106; [+|-]
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<Tleilaxu[UN1]> I am soon to be my own corporation!!!
<Tleilaxu[UN1]> now to start the shady deals and insider trading
<BigSax[UN1]|aboot> send some stock tips my way
<Tleilaxu[UN1]> im the only stock owner... guess i shouldnt try to cheat myself
<Tleilaxu[UN1]> ill be a type-s corporation
<Tleilaxu[UN1]> tried for the faster type-r for the extra horsepower |
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Quote: 97942; Rating: 274; [+|-]
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<Dabz> u know i'm currently being paid to sit home reading bash
<FuzzBuzz`> lol
<Dabz> sick pay rules
<Dabz> mind u, i would usually be being paid to sit in work and read bash :/ |
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Quote: 97955; Rating: 379; [+|-]
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<Zer0_-X-> animeology - the study of japanese animation
<ecat> u must study it quite well
<Zer0_-X-> yah
<Zer0_-X-> i've got phd :D
<Goddess> permanent head damage? |
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Quote: 97963; Rating: 170; [+|-]
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<Gothic> I sound Lovecraftian backwards
<Gothic> Cithog, the black cloud of despair, hatred, and donuts |
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Quote: 97977; Rating: 813; [+|-]
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<manero> so our friend, she's in the part of med school whereu00a0 you do all the genital exams and shit
<manero> and prostrate exams, etc
<manero> and a couple weeks ago, they had to do it on a real person for the first time. and so she was very nervous
<manero> so she's doing the exam, she does the front and everything is ok
<manero> and she does the back door and she gets through it all
<manero> but at the very end, as she finishes
<manero> she didn't know how to tell the dude she was done, so she slapped him on the ass
<manero> i had tears running down my face for 10 minutes after she told the story
<blach> alright bitch, im done with your bunghole *smack
<manero> the funny part was the dude was like 60, too |
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Quote: 97980; Rating: 354; [+|-]
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<Knives-> MY MODEM KEEPS DESYNCING.
* Knives- kicks the modem
<Knives-> I'll call the ISP
<Knives-> They'll tell me "It must be something you've installed"
<Knives-> And I'll go "INSTALLING SOMETHING THAT DESYNCS A MODEM IS LIKE INSTALLING SOMETHING THAT BLOWS UP A PS/2 MOUSE!"
<Knives-> And then they'll blame the phone company.
<Knives-> And I'll say FUCK IT.
<Knives-> And wait until it fixes itself.
<Knives-> There - saved my self the bother and money of calling those pricks. |
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Quote: 97981; Rating: 614; [+|-]
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<Dave2> Had my french oral exam today
<Dave2> It sucked |
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Quote: 97983; Rating: 132; [+|-]
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<Japhro> cams: think you can try and mention e3 a few more times, I don't think I ignored you enough the first few times. |
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Quote: 97987; Rating: 28; [+|-]
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<rB> best part of waking up is vagina on your cock |
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Quote: 97989; Rating: 419; [+|-]
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<Scoteh> Im depressed
<wizzer> why?
<Scoteh> I realised I have more money in an mmorpg than in real life....
<wizzer> Ah...... |
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Quote: 97996; Rating: 329; [+|-]
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<Icedude> you know what pisses me off? when morpheus was jumping for the helicopter in the matrix, agent smith uses a wallhack! THIS IS NOT CS, ITS THE MATRIX! GET YOUR FACTS RIGHT AGENT! |
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Quote: 97997; Rating: 155; [+|-]
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<timovgod> Man, when I saw they said they were going to add color to the $20 bill I thought the meant they were replacing Jackson with Al Sharton |
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Quote: 98001; Rating: 252; [+|-]
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<[CMF]O-Face|wurk> uhm, I never thought that "I am BREADMAN!u00a0 With the POWER TO EAT A SLICE OF BREAD IN 1.9 SECONDS!!!u00a0 - would be a valued superhero power.
<Commando^> Superheros have gone downhill recently |
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Quote: 98002; Rating: 21; [+|-]
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<Ryan> Wind Waker sucks.
<Ryan> Seriously.
<Aduin> RYAN
<Aduin> DIE!
<Ryan> Aduin.
<Jesper> Ryan: You suck. Literally. Aduin told me all about it.
<+Legion> Ryan, you are incorrect.
<Ryan> Nevermind..
<+Legion> WW rules ass.
<Ryan> No, i'm not
<+Legion> Tell me why it sucks.
<Aduin> GO LEG!
<+Legion> And if you say graphics, you die.
<Jesper> I think the graphics look better.
<+Legion> Jesper, me too. :)
<Ryan> No, everything about the game sucks, not just the graphics
* Quits: Ryan ([email protected]) (Killed (Jesper (YOU SAID GRAPHICS))) |
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Quote: 98010; Rating: 28; [+|-]
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[+JM_LOL8] Good thing I have LOTS of HD
[@Tabitha] My penis is bigger than your HD.
[@Tabitha] We should all merge our penises into one big, superpenis. |
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Quote: 98014; Rating: 643; [+|-]
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<Gil_AFK> i hate stuff that works for ages without probs and suddenly dies without a single error message or anything.
<ElctroJkr> like senior citizens |
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Quote: 98015; Rating: 375; [+|-]
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<`Riku> nighty night, don't let the bed bugs bite your head clean off and shit into your neck. |
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Quote: 98016; Rating: 26; [+|-]
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<kszer0> OMG what is the teddy bear doing to that little boy 'O |
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Quote: 98017; Rating: 279; [+|-]
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<+HackerDragon>: uhmmm yeah I had some lube and "other objects" wrapped up in a towel under my bed.u00a0 My mom decided that she was going to be nice and do my laundry for me today cause she is home sick.u00a0 Yeah I just looked under my bed and the lube with objects is there but no towel... |
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Quote: 98020; Rating: 816; [+|-]
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<Blum> I was with a girl once and she pointed and laughed. She said "Who do you think you're going to satisfy with THAT?"
<Blum> I said "Me" |
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Quote: 98024; Rating: 165; [+|-]
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-|- mode/#pwot [+u Snoof] by ChanServ
<Umaro> * ChanServ sets mode: +fu Snoof
<Snoof> :'(
<Umaro> sorry =/
<Snoof> that's the most action i've seen all week |
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Quote: 98037; Rating: 139; [+|-]
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*** sonic_1 ([email protected]) has joined channel #perl
<sonic_1> can someone tell me whats wrong with this script?
<sonic_1> #!/usr/bin/perl
<sonic_1> for $x in 'ls --width=1';
<sonic_1> do 'mv $x ~$x/Mailbox;chown $x.mail ~$x/Mailbox';
<sonic_1> fi |
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Quote: 98039; Rating: 180; [+|-]
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<Tkil> chaos_ -- oh... and if you're a beginner... don't worry overmuch about efficiency.
<billn> if I wanted efficency, I'd put bigger tires on my truck, so I could get the whole cat in one pass. |
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Quote: 98040; Rating: 409; [+|-]
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<q[merlyn]> lem... know any good austin Perl hackers for hire?
<q[merlyn]> I'm on a hunt for one for a friend.
<archon> for a job?
<Stupid_> No, in his spare time merlyn bow-hunts for perl programmers by their scent. |
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Quote: 98042; Rating: 392; [+|-]
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* [petey suspects I-Que of not being 1337!
<I-Que> I'm only 22!
<I-Que> not 1337 |
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Quote: 98043; Rating: 198; [+|-]
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<Murr> DrForr, presumably the tank crew *knew* how to swim, but not how to escape from a tank with open hatch that had turned on its roof before sinking.
<DrForr> The tank flipped over -then- sank? Now that's rich.
<arkuat> what is this about?u00a0 cisco is building tanks now?
<Winkola> arkuat: If they do, you can count on a lot of drowned newbie net admins.
<Winkola> "To report a drowning emergency, press 1, and hold for 27 minutes." |
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Quote: 98045; Rating: 721; [+|-]
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<Mutiny> I'm having this teeny problem and I want to know if somebody can help me with it..
<mjd> mutiny: Sever the main neck tendons before cutting through the spinal cord.u00a0 That will allow you more opportunity to separate the vertebrae prior to removing the head. |
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Quote: 98046; Rating: 482; [+|-]
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<ROM_Man>u00a0 can anyone point me to a resource on how to deal with shadow passwords in perl?
<ROM_Man>u00a0 anyone alive?
<\mjd>u00a0 <rattle> Who dares to disturb my eternal rest?
<\mjd>u00a0 <clank>u00a0 u00a0 <clank>u00a0 u00a0 u00a0 u00a0 u00a0 u00a0 u00a0 u00a0 u00a0 u00a0u00a0 <clank> |
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Quote: 98048; Rating: 358; [+|-]
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<Pinkie2> some guy pissed me off today so i sat on my scanner to send him picture of my ass and the glass broke i just got back from getting 15 stictches
<Louey> pinkie you serious?
<Pinkie2> yup
<Dk__> lol
<Louey> and what was your excuse at the hospital?
<Dk__> you had a really bad day
<Pinkie2> sittin on one cheek right now
<Pinkie2> i told em i sat on a drinkin glass my kid put on chir
<Louey> ahhh
<Dk__> we'll probably be seeing flatbeds with weight restrictions now on
<Dk__> or warning labels, do not sit on glass
<Pinkie2> hehe
<Pinkie2> im gonna sue
<Louey> and now your out a scanner and no retribution for the fuck who made you sit on your scanner
<Pinkie2> next time i will just shit on the scanner and send that to him
<Dk__> ROFL
<Dk__> good idea
<Louey> haha
<|Korombos> Pinkie2 Sometimes man, it is best to remain quiet and thought a fool, than to do what you did, open your mouth and remove all doubt!
<Dk__> heh
<Louey> kor=confuscious
<Dk__> a inspirational quote from kor |
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Quote: 98050; Rating: 313; [+|-]
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<MEGA-Shrike> lat you off my xmas card list
<MEGA-Shrike> you now on another list
<LatinoReheat> list of "Who to make love to before im 30"?
<MEGA-Shrike> THE LIST OF ALMIGHTY PUNISHMENT, PAIN, DEATH AND GENERAL NASTINESS
<LatinoReheat> so shrike, the "Who to make love to before im 30"? then |
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Quote: 98054; Rating: 198; [+|-]
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<Latino_Reheat> where would us anime fans be without masturbation? probably married by now....... |
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Quote: 98056; Rating: 798; [+|-]
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<ironfrost> life sucks
<Majji-woo-woo> so do whores
<Latino|NotIn> but life sucks for free |
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Quote: 98059; Rating: 222; [+|-]
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<Innocent_ASK> Spike from Buffy is my ideal man!
<BishiGartt> he's the male version of Cher
<BishiLatino> only with less penis and more makeup |
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Quote: 98060; Rating: -139; [+|-]
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* yugi--moto[A] is now known as yugi--moto
<Candy> jsfd;'fd
<yugi--moto> hgfnkhgf
<Candy> klfsd;aiou;sda
<yugi--moto> gjfnhmgfhgf;hxfg
<Candy> klsdfj;asljfiosausfd
<yugi--moto> jknbjk
<Candy> lkjsafjl;dsajfsadfoiusafp
<yugi--moto> fm,gnhdkln ,dfznl,df hf
<Candy> asldkjfl;kdsa
<yugi--moto> jfgbhdfjbf
<Candy> Be Right Back
<yugi--moto> ok
<yugi--moto> = |
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Quote: 98061; Rating: 328; [+|-]
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Lawyer-Acidbuk has 11 fingers
<Lawyer-Acidbuk> 10 on my hand and one....*shuts up*
<LatinoReheat> up your ass? |
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Quote: 98063; Rating: 258; [+|-]
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<Guardian_Latino> manboobs give girls something to look at when they're talking to you |
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Quote: 98065; Rating: 154; [+|-]
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<Sugoi-Cless> Lat! what have I told you about eating packets of gravy you find in parking lots!?
<Latino|Working> the same thing you told me about peeing in the sink clessu00a0 <Latino|Working> "its fine if no ones around" |
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Quote: 98066; Rating: 38; [+|-]
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[ LopeDogg ] u know warren
[ LopeDogg ] he always talks about weed affecting him
[ LopeDogg ] questioning whether it does or not
[ LopeDogg ] then he said he went to muyi tai once
[ LopeDogg ] stoned
[ LopeDogg ] and took a piss
[ LopeDogg ] then as he walked away from the urinal he wanted to flush it
[ LopeDogg ] so he pressed his alarm remote
[ LopeDogg ] then when it didnt flush he was like what the fuck |
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Quote: 98067; Rating: 28; [+|-]
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<aBoijj> just realised I'd set the web cache on my proxy to 1TB instead of the 1GB I thought I'd set it to
<aBoijj> the machine only has a 4.3GB drive |
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Quote: 98071; Rating: 815; [+|-]
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<Shawn_Michaels> u no, the moon landing was fake, right?
<t3hpwn> Only in the US will you find people who think the moon landing was fake and wrestling is real...
* Shawn_Michaels kicks t3hpwn in the nads
<t3hpwn> The truth hurts, eh? |
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Quote: 98072; Rating: 395; [+|-]
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<The-Jim> Next time I fly British Airways I'm gonna steal the little knife, fork and spoon, they're like 2/3rd the size of normal ones, gonna keep them in my bag.
<xace> do it
<xace> then when people try to make you use a spork
<xace> be like
<xace> FUCK YOU I HAVE MINI FORK, KNIFE, AND SPOON |
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Quote: 98079; Rating: 1230; [+|-]
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<@Splodge`> I think there might be some incest in my family because my dad's cock tastes exactly like my sister's snatch. |
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Quote: 98080; Rating: 110; [+|-]
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Scarface8393: i was just looking at the bottle of cooking oil because im making spaghetti and i was wondering. what is extra virgin? is that like never ever gonna get laid? |
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Quote: 98097; Rating: 298; [+|-]
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<GodsJiva> cloning should be allowed!
<f0dder> cloning is bad
<f0dder> cause there's too many errors
<GodsJiva> but... if they dont practise, there will always be errors!
<f0dder> just stick to animals at least
<GodsJiva> yeah, to start with
<Koding_W> aye. stick to animals.
<Koding_W> thats my motto. |
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