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Quote: 54474; Rating: 543; [+|-]
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<Dreaded_Fist[using_AOL]> I've had the internet since I was 9
<Dreaded_Fist[using_AOL]> course back then, when I looked for porn, I'd type "pictures of men and woman having sex"
<rpliving> now u just type in "pictures of men" |
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Quote: 54490; Rating: 285; [+|-]
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<Rodzilla> -- 12 percent of Brazilian ladies have had sex with animals.
<Santa_Smith> ew those brazilian women have sex with anything
<Tessai|modeling> smith: THERE'S YOUR CHANCE TO GET SOME ;D!! |
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Quote: 54519; Rating: 170; [+|-]
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(shadow-ohki) I mean Cabbits are very teratoryatal animals. I cant help but dislike you.
(@Arrow) "teratoryatal"
(@Arrow) That is a horrendous bastardization of that word's proper spelling
(@Arrow) territorial
(shadow-ohki) sp what If I cant spell |
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Quote: 54520; Rating: 14; [+|-]
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<Trestkon> A girl got her tonsels (sp?) out, so we all sign the card, and someone gives it to her, and she's like "..."
<Trestkon> cause she can't talk yet:P |
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Quote: 54531; Rating: 515; [+|-]
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<HistoryHm> well, i could never date her
<HistoryHm> three strikes rule
<HistoryHm> republican
<HistoryHm> christian
<unga-work> conscious |
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Quote: 54543; Rating: 1000; [+|-]
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Tarja: TODAY in auto shop
Tarja: there was this giant spider crawling about in Penguin's engine and i insisted no one kill it
Tarja: then Penguin came back (it was his car) and i showed him it
Tarja: and he was like, oh yeah, that's the engine spider, he checks the oil and stuff
Tarja: makes sure everything's running ok |
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Quote: 54546; Rating: 159; [+|-]
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<Fogie> not a tivo, just a creative labs tv tuner card with tivo-like functionality
<AlienCrimeSyndicate> if i had that card fogie, i would rip the trinity broadcasing network 24/7
<Fogie> what is that, pr0n?
<AlienCrimeSyndicate> if televangelists for jesus = pr0n, then yes
<Fogie> to each his own
<Fogie> somewhere in America a man is jerking off to jesus |
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Quote: 54550; Rating: 280; [+|-]
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<nondesc> All I need's a basic optical mouse.
<nondesc> This Logitech is like $12 street price.
<Livewireo> Strret price? are you buying illegal mice from ugly mexicans on the street corner? |
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Quote: 54552; Rating: 279; [+|-]
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*** KeeperX ([email protected]) has joined channel #idle
<KeeperX>: ...
<KeeperX>: Why isn't anyone talking? |
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Quote: 54580; Rating: 197; [+|-]
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<Gobblin> this guy i know is getting like a microwave connection or something
<Gobblin> sounds pretty 1337x0rz
<avat> "damn you old man with your pacemaker, you are slowing my uploads" |
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Quote: 54582; Rating: 277; [+|-]
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<Throttle> man, farting in the shower kinda kills that whole clean feeling u get |
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Quote: 54588; Rating: 510; [+|-]
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<BalkanEmperorGlaug> Another flight attendant's comment on a less than perfect landing: "We asku00a0 you to please remain seated as Captain Kangaroo bounces us to the terminal."
<Schroe[Sleepies]> On my first flight ever, the captain came on over the intercom -
<Schroe[Sleepies]> "We aren't really a flight crew ... but we did stay at a Holiday Inn Express!"
<mike> :P
<mike> i wanna be a pilot
<mike> then i can come over the intercom, "What's this button do...OH FUCKING SHIT!!"
<mike> then after panic ensues, "Just kidding!"
<Glaug-Eldare> "The weather at our destination is 50 degrees with some broken clouds, but we'll try to have them fixed before we arrive."
<Glaug-Eldare> Then you can get fired!
<Glaug-Eldare> =D
<mike> then i can get a job that's on the ground!
<Glaug-Eldare> And throw wrenches at planes' windows while they're taking off?
<mike> i was thinking more along the lines of programming |
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Quote: 54652; Rating: 209; [+|-]
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<miz> man, you just pushed the geek meter right off the scale with the combined MS bash and LOTR reference |
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Quote: 54715; Rating: 153; [+|-]
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* +MegamanX2K takes out a freon thrower and freezes Sitara to the core
* +MegamanX2K then raises her body above his head and shatters it
<+MegamanX2K> FATLITY
<+MegamanX2K> err
<+MegamanX2K> FATALITY
<+MegamanX2K> ...damned typos
<Snow_Angel> fatlity?
<Snow_Angel> is that some sort of gamer geek word?
<+MegamanX2K> It's Mortal Kombat, but Scorpion let himself go |
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Quote: 54722; Rating: 1140; [+|-]
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<DawnG>I was forced to attend a seminar on leadership. We were broken into small groups and each was asked to state what skills a good leader possesses. I wrote, "Needs to be good with elephants and crossing Alps." The others at my table were amused, but the seminar coordinator didn't get it. I said it was a reference to Hannibal, known for his leadership qualities. Her reply: "What leadership qualities? He was a cannibal, and anyway, it was lambs, not elephants." |
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Quote: 54729; Rating: 350; [+|-]
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<Jessica> lol my grandpa has gay dogs Lol
<Jessica> he has two big dogs and they are both boys and they were umm lol
<Anthony> I SAW!
<Anthony> that's sick
<Anthony> heh
<Jessica> my day was boring
<Anthony> not that boring if you saw gay dogs! heh
<Jessica> I laughed and told them to get out of me
<Jessica> lol
<Jessica> OOPS
<Jessica> out of my room
<Jessica> not me
<Anthony> hahahahahahahaha |
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Quote: 54742; Rating: 269; [+|-]
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<kleitin> where are u guys from?
<Hyperbyte> I am from the Netherlands
<kleitin> netherlands is in usa ? |
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Quote: 54757; Rating: 282; [+|-]
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<TrouT> anyone know what this means:
<TrouT> python2.1: can't open file '/usr/local/sbin/RegisterVh3Service'
<+toad-> I think python2.1 can't open the file /usr/local/sbin/RegisterVh3Service |
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Quote: 54760; Rating: 460; [+|-]
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<DarkLich> DarkLich had his first homosexual encounter =(
<DarkLich> It was horrid. I'm not 100% straight.
<DarkLich> NOW
<DarkLich> NOW. I said NOW 100% straight. |
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Quote: 54791; Rating: 188; [+|-]
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<GregMoore> -v raxor
<GregMoore> FUCK
<GregMoore> lol
<GregMoore> -ox raxor
<GregMoore> -o raxor
<GregMoore> HOW DO I FUCK YOU OVER! |
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Quote: 54793; Rating: 228; [+|-]
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(rooster): So, are you hard at work
(rooster): or
(rooster): HARD, at work |
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Quote: 54794; Rating: 198; [+|-]
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<ChuckD> so i got a massive summer sausage today
<ChuckD> what happened
<ChuckD> is i was talking about summer sausage
<ChuckD> and my friend said "i can bring ya summer sausage! i have tons!"
<ChuckD> i thought he was joking
<ChuckD> sure enough, he shows up with a massive summer sausage
<ChuckD> people looked at me funny
<ChuckD> i was carrying around a summer sausage, after all
<Dancer_the_Reindeer> or were you just happy to see them? |
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Quote: 54801; Rating: 4; [+|-]
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<NIH> Dec 12 1917
<NIH> The worst train wreck in history, leaving 543 Frenchmen dead.
<NIH> Worst... or best? |
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Quote: 54802; Rating: 229; [+|-]
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<tak08810> Frostlion, that is the porrest splelling Iv'e ever seen
<Frostlion> no it'sn't
<tak08810> err, poorest, I've, spelling |
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Quote: 54809; Rating: 339; [+|-]
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<SpookyD> if ppl saw what was on my screen right now they would be shocked and disgusted ;)
<DanJ> SpookyD: So get some tissues and clean it |
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Quote: 54838; Rating: 620; [+|-]
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<Dekkon> SHE HAS DSL
<Killrbyte> Digital Subscriber Line?
<nyisles> is it from Speakeasy?
<Killrbyte> Tell her to get cable.u00a0 Its faster.
<Dekkon> DICK SUCKING LIPS
<Dekkon> DAMN NERDS |
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Quote: 54914; Rating: 440; [+|-]
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[Video] I've been watching the warez scene for like two months.
[Video] Nothing is worth DOWNLOADING
[Video] That's sad
[Ouija] i know
[Video] Is that their new anti-piracy technique?
[Video] Release shit no one wants? |
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Quote: 54933; Rating: 232; [+|-]
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*ph34rbot wonders where everyone ran off to
<Kur0Tenshi> We're masturbating to erotic asian art.
<Asmodeus> Is that a clever way of saying "Jerking off to hentai" :)?
<Kur0Tenshi> Bingo. :] |
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Quote: 54935; Rating: 164; [+|-]
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<^{[Dr-Dre]}^> Deos anyone know where i can host a site that supports ASP for free?
<ApoIIyon> insecurehosts.com
<^{[Dr-Dre]}^> ok thanks |
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Quote: 54940; Rating: 23; [+|-]
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zolex: do you call tabbaco a drug?
crummy: yes
crummy: of course its a drug
zolex: its a plant, its not a drug you idiot. |
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Quote: 54978; Rating: 242; [+|-]
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<IAmQueenLara> Oh yeah, I remember you... You disappeared one night after I sent you my photo |
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Quote: 54993; Rating: 253; [+|-]
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:: join #bitchx :: desane ([email protected])
:: mode #bitchx :: (+b *!*@*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*) by pheret
:: kick #bitchx :: pheret kicked desane (banned: If you match this, you have a lame host.) |
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Quote: 55020; Rating: 224; [+|-]
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<Foxxz> OMG! you know our dorm is nerdy when someone finds a math tv show and we all start watching. |
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Quote: 55034; Rating: 575; [+|-]
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<Dilbert> my dad owns a company "Incestors inc."
<Dilbert> investors*
<Dilbert> i meant |
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Quote: 55091; Rating: 269; [+|-]
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<@Megaman> All your base are belong to us
* Arrow sets mode: +b *!*Donnyku@*
* Megaman was kicked by Arrow (That joke is now 2 years, 6 months, 8 days, 5 hours, 30 minutes, and 8 seconds old. Let it die.) |
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Quote: 55095; Rating: 270; [+|-]
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* Cheez is now known as rwxr-xr-x
<MudBlud> ./Cheez |
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Quote: 55128; Rating: 27; [+|-]
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<The_Atari> I also hear they're making a Back to the Future 4
<[-FcG-]aawis> he goes back in time to fix his parkinsons desease |
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Quote: 55155; Rating: 334; [+|-]
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<[Piratez]> I think i'm allergic to porn, everytime I look at porn my cock swells. |
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Quote: 55167; Rating: 1249; [+|-]
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(@Li-Sonder) i'm going to build a castle from the empty soda cans on my desk
(@Li-Sonder) and declare myself king of this desk
(@Li-Sonder) and rule it with an iron fist
(@Li-Sonder) and make all the ants pay taxes
(@Li-Infinite) wow
(@Li-Infinite) you got way too much time on your hand.
(@Li-Sonder) you mean my iron fist. |
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Quote: 55170; Rating: 96; [+|-]
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<KevinIsOwn> An IRC user having sex with someone hot?
<KevinIsOwn> What is the world coming to
<RX> good things kevin
<KevinIsOwn> Yes... VERY good things :D |
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Quote: 55178; Rating: 376; [+|-]
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<#C++:Luggage_> guy in the #vb channel thinks vb is too hard.. so wants to learn assembly..u00a0 i advised him against it, but he thinks it looks easy "nice small words" |
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Quote: 55187; Rating: 357; [+|-]
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impOrted megAmi: life does suck, ya know. i mean, at the bad parts, naturally.
JimBob4554: words of wisdom
JimBob4554: "life sucks when its bad" |
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Quote: 55220; Rating: 94; [+|-]
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<WTM2K> what if i sodomized a priest while the priest is sodomizing an altar boy, WHILE the altar boy is sodomizing a blind 3-legged kitten?
<Meatball> then you tape it and sell it on the black market
<Gentleman> yes
<[N]> yes tape it
<Gentleman> that is hell material
<Livewireo> Only if the kitten was dead |
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Quote: 55229; Rating: 324; [+|-]
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* motionz climbs up the statue of liberty
<motionz> ....
<c-rOCK> JUMP COCKSUCKER
<threeve> jeez what did motionz do
<Video`> Do it, pussy.
<motionz> if that's how you all feel
*** motionz was kicked by c-rOCK (BIG WIND!) |
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Quote: 55231; Rating: 368; [+|-]
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<SO|Razor> treize do you believe in other intelligent life?
<SO|Treize> in the universe?
<SO|Treize> or on forums?
<SO|Razor> ............. |
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Quote: 55280; Rating: 338; [+|-]
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<@WoWMaN\\> this girl put her finger up my ass once
<@WoWMaN\\> I dont wonna sound gay , but it was the best feeling i ever had !
<@Bart\\> dude , that wasnt a girl
<@Bart\\> And it wasnt my finger either |
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Quote: 55328; Rating: 279; [+|-]
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<Steve> http://www.cnn.com/2002/WORLD/asiapcf/east/12/14/korea.nukes/index.html
<Jsangspar> I swear to god, CNN and the government are making everything up
<Jsangspar> and it's starting to fall apart
<Jsangspar> 'The Yongbyon nuclear facility in North Korea. Pyongyang says it will restart the nuclear reactor there '
<Jsangspar> "YONGBYON"? "PYONGYANG"? Now they're just making fun of asian people
<Steve> "Neighbor and potential threat FLIEDLICE has threatened to destroy any troops coming through their territory, be it from the western YELLOWSKIN or the east's SLANTEYEBASTIDS."
<Jsangspar> gahahah |
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Quote: 55337; Rating: 120; [+|-]
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<hajjs> a floppy just got stuck in the computer
<hajjs> htf do i get it out?
<Puppet-Master> force?
<hajjs> i sprayed hand lotion onto it
<hajjs> it got out.... but didn't look pretty |
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Quote: 55341; Rating: 833; [+|-]
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<whiskers> wtf
<whiskers> my sister just called me from her room
<whiskers> told me to turn down the music
<Spyder|TV> crank it
<torontotranceaddict> CRANK IT
<Kinuvan> CRANK IT
*whiskers turns up the music
<whiskers>i hear steps
*** Signoff: whiskers (Ping Timeout) |
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Quote: 55358; Rating: 25; [+|-]
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<garyttu> Dude you are not going to believe this... I played golf with my dad today and put my cell phone in my golf bag....well I started to play like ass and took a nine iron to the side of my bag....OOPS!!!!!
<banshee> Do i need to explain what a dumb ass you are??? LOLOLOL
<garyttu> yeah- it was so funny but at the same time I am sooo pissed at myself
<banshee> That is one of those things... where after you do it... you just know... that it was fate telling you to stop acting like a jack ass... |
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