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Quote: 52967; Rating: 560; [+|-]
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<Mike_Works> There should be holes in massage tables so if you get an erection when you're getting a massage, you can just put it in the hole, so you don't have to stick your ass in the air.
<Mike_Works> There should also be midgets under the tables. Midgets who need the money.
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Quote: 52969; Rating: 156; [+|-]
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* @[b]elitE is away, bored [Pants:OFF] [Hands:ON]
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Quote: 52977; Rating: 252; [+|-]
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<FLB> GRRR
<FLB> I put moisturizer on my hands in the washroom
<FLB> and couldnt turn the door knob to get out
<Hawk--> lol
<FLB> and there were no towels or anything
<FLB> Then I remember I could use my undershirt
<FLB> close call though
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Quote: 52978; Rating: 340; [+|-]
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<FLB> once sex tv showed a room full of women masturbating
<FLB> it was an "orgasm class"
<FLB> and they all go there
<Kamikaze_Watermelon> did you tape it?
<FLB> and in a group
<FLB> finger themselves.
<FLB> Umm
<FLB> No.
<Kamikaze_Watermelon> bastard
<FLB> I was uhh....
<FLB> taking notes?
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Quote: 52980; Rating: 256; [+|-]
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<Bodom83> dir NEW KORN SLIPKNOT DVDS!!
<Nvrmr> cd wrong window
<Nvrmr> dir
<Nvrmr> get dumbass.txt
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Quote: 52989; Rating: 449; [+|-]
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<flawed> i bet #mensa is like #lesbians .. except it's a bunch of retards pretending to be smart, instead of a bunch of guys pretending to be lesbians.
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Quote: 52990; Rating: 937; [+|-]
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<|404notfound> They need to make keyboards without the caps lock button, and then give the buttons to martial arts masters.
<|404notfound> "Only when you can snatch the caps lock from my hand may you yell incessantly like an idiot."
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Quote: 53020; Rating: 97; [+|-]
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<Hot_Guy> Fentom: you're a girl?
<Fentom> -{Hot_Guy}- depends how desperate you are and how much money you will pay for me to come down there
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Quote: 53026; Rating: 184; [+|-]
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<deim0s> I'm all about discrete mathematics and multivariable calculus!
<virt> that sounds like a sad theonion.com personal ad
<virt> let me twiddle your integers, baby :(
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Quote: 53029; Rating: 293; [+|-]
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<Yukanojo> Man, dyn.optonline.net just took a massive shit
<SPOONprez> Yukanojo: too much fiber in the network? :D
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Quote: 53046; Rating: 179; [+|-]
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<sazeMaster> exuse me!
<+joshua> the only excuse for you is your mom wanted another child support check
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Quote: 53061; Rating: 187; [+|-]
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<Rory> I once saw on an import Gundam toy "Dont break steamy translucent fabric or new one will come"
<Rory> wait that was a pack of Japanese condoms
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Quote: 53070; Rating: 532; [+|-]
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<Warhead> call off, everyone: boxers or briefs?
<Enargy> depends
<Warhead> ......control problems?
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Quote: 53080; Rating: 1097; [+|-]
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<Foxie> "My family was asking me all these nosey-ass questions, 'When are you going to find a woman?', 'When are you going to get married?', 'When are you going to have childeren?', then my grandmother was like "Maybe he donesn't like chochate..." and I was like "it's not like I don't like chochlate, it's that I don't
like it without nuts."
<Foxie> "So my uncle was like "You're gay?! You don't look gay!!", so I said "Yes, I'm one of the newer models, I'm a stealth fag."
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Quote: 53081; Rating: 785; [+|-]
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* Hotaru dances more.
<Hotaru> o-<
<Hotaru> o-<
<Hotaru> o-<
<Hotaru> I suck at dancing.
<Vulpes> God help us if you ever try breakdancing.
<Hotaru> o/`>-
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Quote: 53083; Rating: 548; [+|-]
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(doggie^): i remember using morpheus ages back
(doggie^): everytime i searched for something i would get !!!!!!!!preteen sex piss fuck shit animals ......................... .avi
(doggie^): was very annoying
([olly]): lol
(slippy^): yeh :/
(slippy^): that movie sucked
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Quote: 53085; Rating: 401; [+|-]
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<epx> Some hacker is trying to hack into my computer for the last couple of days. Norton firewall blocked the hacker everytime. I know it is from the same person because the same IP address (192.168.1.100) keeps poping up. How do I locate his location using his IP address? What can else can I do?
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Quote: 53096; Rating: 118; [+|-]
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* koin freaks.
<koin> Harry Potter porn X_x
<koin> Not what I was looking for. Well, not HP anyway. :P
<Solaris> Been there, done that, bought it.
<koin> You have HP porn?
<Solaris> No.
<koin> I was about to say...
<koin> ...Why aren't you shari- I mean <_< >_>
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Quote: 53103; Rating: 263; [+|-]
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Cypher: well i think i got everything packed
Owen: + 1 packing skill (Cypher)
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Quote: 53125; Rating: 188; [+|-]
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*** Keyser is now known as Keyser|driveby
<Keyser|driveby> brb
<Keyser|driveby> crawling on floor for a while :\
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Quote: 53138; Rating: 74; [+|-]
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<Jeeeeebus> wtf
<Jeeeeebus> when I click the minimize button, it is minimizing my cursor to the other side of the screen
<Yawgmoth> its a feature, not a bug.
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Quote: 53160; Rating: 184; [+|-]
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<DrLickies> Anyone who wants to fight me, I'll be at Yonge and College in like 25 minutes
<capitan0> don't homos hang at yonge and college ?
<DrLickies> No, I think they hang a couple of blocks east
<DrLickies> But maybe some homosexuals hang there
<smackhead> DrLickles- homosexuals will be hanging there in 25 minutes, apparently
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Quote: 53166; Rating: 307; [+|-]
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<`Apoc`> i blew a load inside my girl
<Shiv[0utz0r]> LOL
<Shiv[0utz0r]> welcome to the club
<`Apoc`> whats the chances of her becoming pregnant
<Apocalypse_DFA[spam-eater]> if she wants to be pregnant, 50%. If she doesnt want to be pregant...100%
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Quote: 53173; Rating: 47; [+|-]
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*** User Jezus has logged off the chat for idle time (13293 seconds).
[PlanetBob] Wow.. we've been visited by Jezus.. the new..and HIP jesus..
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Quote: 53179; Rating: 1861; [+|-]
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<@TheRef>My girlfriend caught me sleep-wanking last night
<hoochy>lol, typo. i'm a post that to bash
<@TheRef>Dude, that wasn't a typo.
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Quote: 53181; Rating: 385; [+|-]
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<Eku{MY}> Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink what ever comes out"?
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Quote: 53186; Rating: 487; [+|-]
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<testify> i hate the CLI which i have been using for 5 dam years
<testify> like i said, its the year 2003 not 1984
<snaund> testify: umm, it's 2002 here
<snaund> must be a timezone thing
<testify> well its near 2003
<snaund> testify: there's a special name for the year that's nearly 2003
<testify> taht is?
<snaund> testify: 2002
<testify> ok
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Quote: 53241; Rating: 232; [+|-]
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<bda> I need a job where I can get laid in the line of duty.
<beady> teacher?
<claws03> grade school?
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Quote: 53275; Rating: -6; [+|-]
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* odds5050 has sent you a Christmas greeting. Type /server mail to view the attachment
*** King_menthol has quit IRC
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Quote: 53284; Rating: 641; [+|-]
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<@Headlor> when i live somewhre less gay
<@Headlor> im getting a cat
<@Headlor> and calling it "Hitler Stalin Mao"
<@Headlor> or just stalin
<@Headlor> "whats your cat called?"
<@Headlor> "stalin."
<@Headlor> "."
<@Headlor> ill write on its littertray "human rights"
<@Headlor> and on its bowl "flesh of the capitalist pig dogs"
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Quote: 53285; Rating: 1367; [+|-]
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<Slime> I think in ten years time I will look back on days like this and cry.
<Slime> The times I spent at 2am talking about girls who have dicks and legs made of slugs eating each other whilst melting.
<Slime> My future wife will be all "Tell me what you did as a teenager" and I will say ".NOW IS TIME FOR SLEEP."
<MechaMrEd> And then you'll notice she has an erection
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Quote: 53299; Rating: 187; [+|-]
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<hobbs> SetiAtHome -- turn your laptop into a space heater. :)
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Quote: 53301; Rating: 65; [+|-]
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<Angelic> man who catch fly with chopsticks ... should eat in different restaraunt!
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Quote: 53320; Rating: 278; [+|-]
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<RedRabbit> guys does os/2 mean only half an operating system ?
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Quote: 53321; Rating: 352; [+|-]
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<IsamuDyson> i think they need to get out and meet some people
<BloodFromStone> Hey, I won't allow that kind of talk in here.
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Quote: 53327; Rating: 115; [+|-]
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<tokumei> green tea incense yo
<tokumei> and no pot for me today
<PFunk> Trying to quit?
<JeffreyAtW> Ooh, Toku's turning Republican and lying about his heavy drug use instead of admitting it
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Quote: 53338; Rating: 308; [+|-]
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<AL9000> hehe, I called up one of my female friends today while I was naked
<AL9000> I was actually slapping it around to see if she'd ask what that noise was
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Quote: 53346; Rating: 106; [+|-]
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<Kruge> I think there should be a seperate internet for ugly bitches
<Kruge> suuuure, if you wanna take amateur porn pics of yourself, you go right ahead. But post them on the Ugly Bitch Web
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Quote: 53353; Rating: 361; [+|-]
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<NightO> Jesus is coming, everyone, look busy!!
--- solicit sets ban on jesus!*@*
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Quote: 53382; Rating: 10; [+|-]
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<nuance> er s/./,
<cherub> don't forget to s/0,5/0.5/!
<nuance> regexp nazi
<cherub> s/nazi/victim/
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Quote: 53419; Rating: 143; [+|-]
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<Oliver> uni is too hardcore for me
<Oliver> spent 2 days there
<Oliver> could hardly walk
<teles> lol :)
<teles> that'll teach you to visit the toilets in the art school :p
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Quote: 53448; Rating: 133; [+|-]
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[@ToastyX] I almost typed cd / to try to leave a channel
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Quote: 53451; Rating: -4; [+|-]
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<Dave_The_Insane[depressed]> whats with all the netsplits?
<Rodzilla> J0 MAMA
<Dave_The_Insane[depressed]> o_O
<Rodzilla> SHE'S SO FAT SHE SPLIT THE FREAKING INTERNET IN HALF
<Rodzilla> AHAAHAHAHAHHAH
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Quote: 53456; Rating: 279; [+|-]
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<codewolf> I need a new toy, I've played with this one enough
<codewolf> maybe a Z4
<Teatime> Or a miata.
<Teatime> codewolf: A ferrari.
<Teatime> Or an RUF Porsche
<fluffy> Teatime: or he could just save a lot of money and get a sign that says "im insecure about the size of my penis."
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Quote: 53457; Rating: 79; [+|-]
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<TreeSquid> he's not foreign, just stupid
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Quote: 53462; Rating: 101; [+|-]
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<bunneh> he used to talk to my mate and he admitted to liking me and the next day we found out we were related...
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Quote: 53473; Rating: -11; [+|-]
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<Jesse> shit. i dont know wether i should anally rape you like a blonde ass whiteboy or beat you like a red headed stepchild
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Quote: 53478; Rating: 252; [+|-]
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<Marand> My girlfriend's parents are paranoid. They don't trust the internet and are extremely against chatrooms.
<Marand> if ($person == 'online') { $person = "pervert dograping kiddiefucker" }
<Marand> Maybe it's because they know me
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Quote: 53481; Rating: 141; [+|-]
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<SiZZuRp> this is from www.pk-hq.com
<SiZZuRp> Most users ever online was 138 on 02-14-2002 at 13:33.
<SiZZURp> a sad valentines day......... date much?
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Quote: 53482; Rating: 133; [+|-]
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<weebl> i might have a meet saturday morning
<weebl> cuz of that fucker
<weebl> who took a shit in wakefield's pool
<weebl> the remeet might be like, 8 in the fuckin' morning
<DoubleHelix> LOL!
<DoubleHelix> someone drop'd a deuce in the pool!
<DoubleHelix> lol
<DoubleHelix> wtf is that shit
<weebl> yeah
<weebl> and they didn't notice till after the divers had gone
<DoubleHelix> HAHAH!
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