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Quote: 51363; Rating: 171; [+|-]
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<Sloan|Eat> Aquaman's ancient nemesis is Captain Highliner.
<Goonigoogoo> Aquaman's ancient nemesis is sand
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Quote: 51372; Rating: 178; [+|-]
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<ragnarok2040> @_@, i have a mouse scratching directly above my head
<Uzzab0x> trailer mice O_o
* _absent 0_o CKY - Shock and Terror [3:07]
<ragnarok2040> :/ and i can't beat on the ceiling cuz it messes up the ceiling fan
<ragnarok2040> so i have to ignore it
<Uzzab0x> I pity j00 rag :D
<_absent> haha your trailer is infested with canadians
<_absent> *mice
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Quote: 51382; Rating: 626; [+|-]
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* magicsmoke returns with a mug of coffee that is still almost black after adding milk
kiri : lol
kiri : that's some heavey coffee then
magicsmoke : i could say that the spoon is standing up in it..
magicsmoke : but i can't see the spoon. i think it's dissolved
Alpha1 : There is no spoon
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Quote: 51393; Rating: 348; [+|-]
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<essex-> man that was no fart
<essex-> brbrb
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Quote: 51403; Rating: 276; [+|-]
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<ChineseElite> there is nothing wrong with using linux..
<Threeboy> if that's the lifestyle you wanna live, i wont judge you.
<Threeboy> i just wont support you at the parades.
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Quote: 51418; Rating: 162; [+|-]
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<NyseriA> i think i should inform you that i am totally naked at the keyboard.....and i just sat on a box of screws :(((((((((((((
<Weebl> is your webcam on nys?
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Quote: 51424; Rating: 132; [+|-]
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<mikaru> cumshots are amusing.
<autistk> bukkake isn't however.. it's just odd
<autistk> fuckin japanese have to always take a decent idea and then totally fuck it up
<mikaru> scary part with jap porn is the girls are yelping and yet the guys arent exactly well endowed, almost as though it's a porno and not real, but i refuse to belief that.
<autistk> they probably put wasabi on them or something
<mikaru> ahahah
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Quote: 51425; Rating: 8; [+|-]
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<mikaru> thinkgeek.com has some l33t a55 tshirts.
<mikaru> literally/
<autistk> mikaru: dude, I think you'll find they are, in fact, g3y455 shirts
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Quote: 51432; Rating: 64; [+|-]
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Kaji: "i think willingly putting your child in a porno comes under the catergory of unfit parent"
Jallil d'lil 'anonen: depends on the kind of porno...if it were snuff yeah, but the real classy kind is okay
Kaji: ...mmk
Jallil d'lil 'anonen: pretend I didn't say that
Kaji, Maelthra D' Llaren: i will..
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Quote: 51436; Rating: 288; [+|-]
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<@i386> NEXT Year, me, skool. pointelss educational films. susicide
<BenZor> Dude
<BenZor> if you spell like that, it isnt pointless.
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Quote: 51463; Rating: 247; [+|-]
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<chadamir> I was gonna call my band 'trebek is god' but we decided that was a better album name and then we decided not to use it at all
<kolby> and then you realized there was no band
<kolby> it was just you and a karaoke machine
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Quote: 51467; Rating: -16; [+|-]
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<Champion> id never admit to being homosexual
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Quote: 51496; Rating: 624; [+|-]
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<webby_g[work]> some guy just forgot his login and NEEDED to print out some work, so I let him login into my account and print it off, aren't I NICE?
<Zarei> no now all your bases will belong to him
<webby_g[work]> he was supervised, so if he did try to me up me the bomb, he would have had no chance to survive make his time.
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Quote: 51498; Rating: 460; [+|-]
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<meyowith> almost done cleaning my room :D
<meyowith> now to untangle my wires..
Quit: Meyowith (connection reset by peer)
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Quote: 51517; Rating: 174; [+|-]
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<Khey> There was this soap opera on the TV in the customer lounge at work and there were these black people on it
<Khey> And I thought to myself
<Khey> "Man, why don't they get 'real' black people in soap operas?"
<duffey> Haha
<Khey> I'm not talking about some upper-middle class light-skinned 'nigga' either.
<Khey> Some dark-skinned, thugg'd out, bling-blingin', grill'd up guy.
<Khey> With cornrows and a stocking cap
<Khey> I'd watch soap opera's then.
<Khey> "Oh no, Johnny's mom was kidnapped"
<Khey> "AW SHIT NIGGA I'S FUNNA CAP ME SOME CRACKAS"
<Khey> or something
<Khey> Anyways, enough of Stereotype Theatre with Mr.K
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Quote: 51519; Rating: 861; [+|-]
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* Feren considers quitting his job and starting a small ISP in the yukon by strapping wireless access points to grizzly bears.
<JenWolf> That seems only slightly less dangerous than you current job.
<Feren> I suppose.
* JenWolf can imagine the help desk calls you'd get. "Help, my access point ate my little brother."
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Quote: 51528; Rating: 200; [+|-]
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<Karp> Who am I to judge myself?
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Quote: 51537; Rating: 220; [+|-]
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<eqnox> I need ddr to unlease my full power
<kingBooze> ddr?
<eqnox> dance dance revolution
<kingBooze> I've never played
<kingBooze> is it as fun as everyone says it is?
<bennid> no
<bennid> just gay
<DSmooth> kingBooze: ddr is for ghetto kids
<DSmooth> at the arcade
<DSmooth> and their white trash girlfirends watch them play
<DSmooth> until they've had enough
<DSmooth> then they take them home and beat them
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Quote: 51551; Rating: 255; [+|-]
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* Joins: rock ([email protected])
<rock> hey
<Capn_Panic> hey
<Shockster> hey
<Capn_Panic> it's fat albert!
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Quote: 51590; Rating: 211; [+|-]
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<DA_BUTCHER> Annie will you marry me?
<DA_BUTCHER> I don't care what gender you are!
<|Annie|> shizz
<DA_BUTCHER> I'm Greek
<|Annie|> that's like the 6th time someone's asked me that in here
<|Annie|> I'll get back to you k ._.
<Scotch> It's your own fault for making your gender so obvious in your nick
<DA_BUTCHER> yes but the others would freak out if you turned out to be a 30 year old wrestler named Bernard
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Quote: 51597; Rating: 166; [+|-]
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<b1u3^t3rr0r> bash.org; yet more proof there are people more fucked up than me.
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Quote: 51612; Rating: 158; [+|-]
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<DrZaius44> pc load letter? What the fuck is PC load letter??
<CharCoal69> a letter that says "I shot my load. Sorry. -- Your Computer"
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Quote: 51615; Rating: 411; [+|-]
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<TunkeyMicket> HOLY SHIT MY COMPUTER IS BROADCASTING AN IP ADDRESS
<TunkeyMicket> HOW DO I MAKE IT STOP
<TunkeyMicket> THIS WINDOW CAME UP
<TunkeyMicket> TOLD ME THAT IT WAS DANGEROUS
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Quote: 51616; Rating: 48; [+|-]
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<CharCoal69> and I made 2 dollars selling cigarettes to children in third world countries. I told them it was food.
|
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Quote: 51623; Rating: 1155; [+|-]
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<EmpressMay> When I was 5, I was in Radio Shack's battery club.
<RegEdit> The first rule about battery club is you do not talk about battery club.
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Quote: 51627; Rating: 146; [+|-]
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<DracoDanMP> i spent all day reading on www.bash.org
<@MalHavoc> and that is why you fail.
<DracoDanMP> then i realized that only a true geek would even get 99% of the jokes, much less think they were funny
<@MalHavoc> I bet you laughed your ass off all fucking day :P
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Quote: 51637; Rating: 4; [+|-]
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<Tiberiumsun01> I am so lonely, I wish a girl would look at me <maq> maybe you should wait around in parking lots at night until one comes by and stuff her in a potato sack
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Quote: 51641; Rating: 221; [+|-]
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denisbaldwin: I think I love you...
denisbaldwin: So what am I so afraid of...
denisbaldwin: I'm afraid that I'm not sure of...
denisbaldwin: A love there is no cure for.
alexusslave: like herpes?
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Quote: 51669; Rating: 1970; [+|-]
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<BlackHawk> LULU: I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got no titties
<LULU> You wear pants don't you?
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Quote: 51716; Rating: 182; [+|-]
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<@pork> whats best buy
<@Al> pork: it's a store, they're kind of like the trading posts you have in australia only with carpet and fewer cured crocodile hides.
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Quote: 51746; Rating: 105; [+|-]
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<Samantha> What bird was named for what was wrongly thought to be its country of origin?
<Kevyn> Turkey
<Samantha> Kev is da man
<Kevyn> It was either that or the Mexican
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Quote: 51753; Rating: 529; [+|-]
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<Kevyn> Ooh PeeTree has his webcam on, and he has GIRLS in his room. I hope they get naked.
<Uncle_Tobias> WOW GIRLS? WHAT ARE THESE STRANGE THINGS AND DO THEY COME WITH MAC OS 6?
<Kevyn> That'd be awesome if he left the room for a minute and the girls started making out, unaware that the webcam was on.
<NuttO> I think it'd be funnier if they pissed in his shoes when he left the room.
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Quote: 51758; Rating: 301; [+|-]
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<LADYCHUMY> rebooting everyone
*** LADYCHUMY has quit IRC (Quit: U asked me whom I luv d most , i said my life, u cried n turned away, tears fell coz u left abt 2 say ur my life...)
<Viggo> hmmm
<Viggo> that sentiment was ruined by AOL slang
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Quote: 51765; Rating: 175; [+|-]
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<wanman2> c++ is so much more intuitive than any language i've learned
<wanman2> that's my thought of the night
<wanman2> and with that, good night.
<fib> let us bathe in its profundity
<wanman2> and lather ourselves with its wisdom
<lbandit> and watch it flow down the drain
<lbandit> amidst our pubic hairs and semen
<lbandit> and urine
<wanman2> and vaginal discharge
<fib> my bishop delivers no sermons in the shower
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Quote: 51783; Rating: 139; [+|-]
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<@Daybreaker> bah
<@Daybreaker> i got sick oF that bin laden game the first time i played it
<@Daybreaker> like a year ago
<@Daybreaker> fuck flash games
<@Blur> hentai?
<@Daybreaker> shush
<@Daybreaker> i caN't stand a game where the difficulty levels are "poorly made" "badly made" and "free 15 day macromedia preview"
<@Blur> lol
<@Daybreaker> fuck all that
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Quote: 51807; Rating: 304; [+|-]
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<Bretty> A 16yr old boy asks his dad what a pussy looks like before sex...he says " well son it looks like a nice rose petal" Boy replies.."well what does it lookl ike afterwards?"
<Bretty> Father says....."have you ever seen a bulldog eating mayonaise?"
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Quote: 51823; Rating: 336; [+|-]
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<Myst> It would, however, be funnier.
<Myst> Since Canadians are funnier by nature.
<WTM2K> just because we laugh at you doesn't mean you're funny
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|
Quote: 51825; Rating: 616; [+|-]
|
* Nazgul thinks it's amusing when people are soooo anal retentive that they can't even pass up a single mistyped letter.
<Rico||Sleep>: Anal-retentive is hyphenated...
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|
Quote: 51830; Rating: 499; [+|-]
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<Red_Sky> We'll call it "Shut the hell up", and you'll go first.
<Red_Sky> Now, the object of this game, Deos, is to shut the hell up.
<Red_Sky> You're doing exceptionally well for a beginner.
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Quote: 51861; Rating: 449; [+|-]
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<Red_Sky> It must have been a slow newsday. The headline for today's paper is 'Suicide Bomber Killed'.
|
|
Quote: 51890; Rating: 529; [+|-]
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<bllllll> The instructions said to install Microsoft Windows(tm) XP or better, so I installled OpenBSD.
|
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Quote: 51899; Rating: 320; [+|-]
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<Cow> the night is young! so young that If I were to have sex with it, it wouldn't know what I was doing, would be scarred for life and develop multiple personality disorder to evade the shock!
<Cow> ....
<Cow> ...
<Cow> seriously.
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Quote: 51904; Rating: 204; [+|-]
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<orion> i was like MAN CHECK OUT THIS HOTTIE
<orion> he's all SLOW DOWN SCROLLING MAN SHE'S FUCKING HOT
<orion> OH MAN SHE'S EXTREMELY HOT
<orion> he complimented her more than any other female i've ever heard him talking about
<orion> even models and shit
<orion> then BAM i went to the dick shot
<orion> "WHAT TEH FUCK I HATE YOU MAN THAT'S SO PHOTOSHOPPED"
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Quote: 51915; Rating: 1119; [+|-]
|
<MerryXmouse> My mum and dad were just yelling at each other and I walked up and said "Can you two stop being wankers?" and my mum hit me on the head and goes "I'll wank you!...... No I won't..."
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Quote: 51990; Rating: 92; [+|-]
|
< gimbgoth> Fatal-Err: yeah, that's a bummer huh
< Fatal-Err> bummer? what means bummer?
<+insight> damn
<+Moak> it's fuck in the "okay-to-say-at-mom's-table" version
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|
Quote: 51991; Rating: 66; [+|-]
|
<Area-51> wanna know a good one?
<AOLuser> a good one what?
<Area-51> i mistyped the "yes | rm ..." command and deleted my entire home directory, including the eggdrop :P
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|
Quote: 51994; Rating: 257; [+|-]
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* animosity`snow`boardin is now known as animosity`FUCKING`PARENTS
<tP-InfamousGadget> ewww
|
|
Quote: 51996; Rating: 147; [+|-]
|
Joe Fox : you know in multiplayer FPS', how in multiplayer their names go above their heads
Nanaki_ZPilot_assassin : yeah
Joe Fox : they need that in real life
Nanaki_ZPilot_assassin : LOL
Joe Fox : and you know how you can veiw peoples pings
Joe Fox : well, life needs that too, but for IQ not ping
Darth_Bowser : shit
Darth_Bowser : most of the IQs would be very low
Joe Fox : and life needs respawning too
Darth_Bowser : =P
Joe Fox : damnit, life needs to be a FPS
Darth_Bowser : heh
Darth_Bowser : that would be amusing
Joe Fox : where i have like a "cable" brain and everyone else has "56k" brains
Darth_Bowser : *cough* =P
Joe Fox : and you have a 128k brain
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Quote: 51999; Rating: 481; [+|-]
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<Tak777> I have returned
* Feops disbelieves
<Feops> 1d20+1
<Ragnaar> Feops: 1d20+1 (6)
<Feops> damn
<Feops> fine, you're here.
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Quote: 52000; Rating: 210; [+|-]
|
<_pLaGueD_> do you know a cheat for invincibility?
<Dead_One> yeah
<_pLaGueD_> how?
<Dead_One> type bind "mouse1" "kill"
<Dead_One> it blows up what ever you are looking at
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