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Quote: 48433; Rating: 301; [+|-]
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<sprawd_> how do i delete the history in konquerer?
<RichiH> the smart way of saying "i've been browsing porn at my dad's computer" |
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Quote: 48435; Rating: 162; [+|-]
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<Nike> i swear, my MP3's get scratched
<Loop> probably nike
<Nike> like i got a really annoying little brother sim wandering around my home directory |
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Quote: 48443; Rating: 86; [+|-]
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<Smerdyakov> ... based _only_ one, I mean
<Smerdyakov> s/one/alshfsafa
<Smerdyakov> s/alshfsafa/afsaagagaskhaah
<Smerdyakov> s/afsaagagaskhaah/on |
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Quote: 48470; Rating: 189; [+|-]
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<Nazgul> my grandma got some pictures developed, and she was showing them to me, and said that they must have accidently one of someone else's pictures in with hers
<Nazgul> because there was a pic of a woman and man standing beside each other with their dog
<Nazgul> and I was looking at it, and thinking weird..then looked in the upper right hand corner and saw a flying saucer in the sky
<Nazgul> and was like "SHIT!"
<BloodFromStone> o_o
<BloodFromStone> Don't send them back.
<Nazgul> then flipped it over and it was a promotional advertisement thing for "Taken" on the scifi channel
* Nazgul chuckles. |
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Quote: 48472; Rating: 342; [+|-]
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u0095u0095u0095u00a0 abcdefg ([email protected]) has joined:u00a0 #geekissues
<datacide>[@] abcdefg
<datacide>[@] your nick sucks
<Soberguy> my friend has a cousin whose name is actually abcde
<Neon[UK]>[+] lol
<Neon[UK]>[+] bored parents?
<Soberguy> when you pronounce it like she does it actually sounds quite cool |
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Quote: 48488; Rating: 336; [+|-]
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cptchris F O O: i was measureing my dick and it said 10 in, i was happy till i realized the ruler was backwards |
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Quote: 48500; Rating: 281; [+|-]
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<@JeffRaven> I posted a question about putting a time limit on how long someone can be logged onto win2k
<@JeffRaven> and several people from IT departments of companies have emailed me wondering if I found an answer
<@JeffRaven> boy they'd be shocked if they found out I'm just a unemployed college graduate trying to limit the time of my brother on the computer |
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Quote: 48501; Rating: 515; [+|-]
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Phut: ooh
Phut: I just had an idea
Phut: I wanna save up a lot of money...... rent a billboard, and just simply put "www.goatse.cx" on it.u00a0 Nothing else but that.
Phut: that would own |
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Quote: 48504; Rating: 207; [+|-]
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<NinjaStu> ack! Scotch Irish on my keyboard!
<NinjaStu> if i start typing funny
<NinjaStu> my keyboard is intoxicated |
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Quote: 48505; Rating: 789; [+|-]
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Jigglyjuff: that's worse then that peanut, butter and jelly sandwich i hear all americans like
<CHAT MattDavis>u00a0 no
<CHAT MattDavis>u00a0 peanut butter
Jigglyjuff: oh! that makes much more sense |
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Quote: 48510; Rating: 96; [+|-]
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<leper> i'm a linux nub
<leper> so
<leper> do i edit that in... ?
<leper> notepad? |
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Quote: 48513; Rating: 588; [+|-]
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<Snoogans> oh man...I forwarded the goatse.cx site to a shitload of people at work
<Snoogans> heeh
<Snoogans> all I heard was OH FUCK
<Catcher80> lmao
<Snoogans> it was gold
<Catcher80> where do you work?
<Snoogans> a large internet security company
<Catcher80> haha
<Catcher80> "do your security holes look like this?"
<Snoogans> I sure hope not
<Snoogans> then any homo can get in
<Snoogans> HAHAHAHAH |
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Quote: 48519; Rating: 469; [+|-]
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<Pikaben> Dude. I just heard my little sister shout "I'm not naked!".
<Pikaben> Should I go check what's going on? |
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Quote: 48523; Rating: 497; [+|-]
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<Caffy> I was just in my Attic and I heard a few rat's run around and I was like, dad did you know there are rats up here?
<Caffy> And he replied with, "It's alright, Mortin doesnt bite"
<Caffy> WTF, MY HICK FATHER NAMED THE RAT MORTIN?!? |
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Quote: 48538; Rating: 265; [+|-]
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<Liza> but.. plis.. tell to everybody that in argentina we live.. with human rigths broken i dont know how to express because my english is not so good help us!
<divdiv> stop complaining, you get adsl, I'd gladly give up our human rights for adsl |
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Quote: 48548; Rating: 405; [+|-]
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<Vincent_T> natl: are you m/f?
<natl> Yes, I am. |
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Quote: 48566; Rating: 208; [+|-]
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<Saiy> Pringles is the new masturbation fad
<Splat> Which must mean that Pringles is AKIN to...
<Splat> ...
<Splat> CANNED SEX!
<Ed> Pringles is the new masturbation?
<Ed> I guess now it's "Once you pop the fun stops" |
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Quote: 48581; Rating: 372; [+|-]
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<alexs> documentation is like sex, when its good, its very good, when its bad, its better than nothing |
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Quote: 48582; Rating: 148; [+|-]
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<BenZor> I once kissed a guy for $20, but he wouldn't take $50 for a handjob :/ |
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Quote: 48590; Rating: 824; [+|-]
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(AnAcOnDa): www.goatse.cx
(sd3mon): been there done that
(blackanese): done that? |
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Quote: 48594; Rating: 544; [+|-]
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<VooDoo3dfx> She's a lesbian dude.
<Absolut> Really?
<VooDoo3dfx> Yeah.
<VooDoo3dfx> She's never had a guy though.
<Absolut> Once you go dick... you never go chick.
<Absolut> Oh shit
<Absolut> I didn't say that!!! |
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Quote: 48595; Rating: 207; [+|-]
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<orion> man
<orion> fuck pints
<orion> our corner store is selling QUARTS now
<Hat> Where do you live, Ireland? |
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Quote: 48600; Rating: 533; [+|-]
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*** d3 ([email protected]) has joined #blackskies.ca
<`brad> d3
<`brad> d3
<`brad> d3
<Hat> You sunk my battleship! |
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Quote: 48601; Rating: 69; [+|-]
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<+Black_Ninja> What's the difference between the catholic church and the national prison system?
<RedComet> you dont have to drop the soap to get it up the ass?
<+Black_Ninja> Ans: the prisions wait until the kids are over 18 before sending them to places where they can get raped |
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Quote: 48604; Rating: 91; [+|-]
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<Chubbzilla> omg
<Chubbzilla> MSN just offered me txt porn
<HKR|VC> !
<Chubbzilla> what the fuck is the world coming too
<Ruu> MSN isn't nearly as bad as ICQ
<Chubbzilla> no, but this is liek
<Chubbzilla> first one ever
<Chubbzilla> bcos i got the new msn messenger liek, an hour ago
<Chubbzilla> it has great new features, liek txt porn
* HKR|VC downloads |
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Quote: 48611; Rating: 199; [+|-]
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<Igatona> Seriously, the biblical club at my school only plays minesweeper and never do anything else
<+MegamanX2K> do they think the mines represent sin and your pointer is jesus |
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Quote: 48613; Rating: 112; [+|-]
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<KiLLaKoW> http://www.discountbabies.com/cgi-bin/ebaby/auction.cgi?afterdinnermints&1077202666
* APE_ wonders if u can actually buy them
<SonicRageX> ape do you know how many people there arethat want babies but cantu00a0 have them
<APE_> yeh
<APE_> something like a few million
<KiLLaKoW> that is such a retarded figure
<KiLLaKoW> there are probably more than twice that number up for auct...err, adoption |
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Quote: 48616; Rating: 28; [+|-]
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<Ear> andy: but Methodists think jebus and god are one.
<Ear> Which means he impregnated his mother with himself.
<andy> hahah.
<Ear> :D
<andy> he was jerking it in the womb |
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Quote: 48621; Rating: 953; [+|-]
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<DarkSpork> rock
<Mal> scissors
<Mal> ...
<Mal> DAMN! |
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Quote: 48629; Rating: 450; [+|-]
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<Xellos-san> don't confuse barbecues with hookers
<Xellos-san> the only way you can tell them apart is to set them on fire
<Xellos-san> if it runs away, it's a hooker
<Xellos-san> if it stays, it's a barbecue
<Xellos-san> or a dead hooker |
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Quote: 48650; Rating: 321; [+|-]
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<+ariana_> good perl code is indistinguishable from line noise |
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Quote: 48654; Rating: 302; [+|-]
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<Tatws_> dammit!
<Tatws_> i typed "cg_draw2D 0" in the console to get rid of the 2D things and i dont know how to get them back!
<Tatws_> how to get them bak!?
<Buck> ehrm
<Buck> switch the 0 for a 1? dumbass
<Tatws_> ha that wil never work! you think im stupid? |
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Quote: 48673; Rating: 213; [+|-]
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<Scruffypoo> BaLLeriNNa: dunno about best friends.u00a0 me and the kernel aren't even on speaking terms at the moment.u00a0 i have to tell bash a message for the kernel, and it tells the kernel.u00a0 then, hopefully, the kernel doesn't get massively depressed and run away or anything. |
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Quote: 48676; Rating: 666; [+|-]
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* DuneBoy is fucking dead tires
<DuneBoy> d |
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Quote: 48684; Rating: 289; [+|-]
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<voyweiser> what's the record for the most blowjobs in one day? cause i think i broke it.
<LlnK> how many guys did you give head today?
<voyweiser> stfu whore. i guess i walked right into that one huh? |
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Quote: 48690; Rating: 394; [+|-]
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<Dashiva> "There comes a special time in every young woman's life when special things start to happen.."
<hibbert> every month, foru00a0 afew days, its ok to be a bitch
<Lanfear> ...you men dont know how easy you have it
<hibbert> whatever
<hibbert> you dont have to deal with carting around this huge piece of meat everywhere
<Dashiva> hahahhah
<dogma-> lol
<hibbert> its like im pregnant, and the baby is hanging between my legs |
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Quote: 48695; Rating: -184; [+|-]
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<orion> goh, despite your new image of being an intelligent nigger
<goh`> yup
<orion> you are still
<orion> a nigger. |
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Quote: 48696; Rating: 1004; [+|-]
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<xjeff> ok this is just the way I talk...I misspell because some word's I say arn't exetly proper so please Lay off I been real nice ever-since I came here because I did NOT won't to make enamey's out of STARS fan's
<xjeff> so there!
<Sotek> You talk with apostrophes in the middle of plural words? o_O
<xjeff> yes that's just the way I talk
<Sotek> ...
<Sotek> NO
<xjeff> ...............
<Sotek> IT ISN'T.
<Sotek> IT CANNOT BE.
<xjeff> it can
<Sotek> YOU CANNOT PRONOUNCE AN APOSTROPHE. |
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Quote: 48698; Rating: 443; [+|-]
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<cbf> oh that reminds me, I might've given your number out in a irc channel last night
<Mr_E> are you fucking serious?
<Mr_E> if you're the reason some cunt called me at 4 in the fucking morning I'ma throw bricks through your window |
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Quote: 48699; Rating: 163; [+|-]
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<lbandit> oh god
<lbandit> i'm in the "seattle gay news online" |
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Quote: 48712; Rating: 19; [+|-]
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<zephir> hm
<zephir> think my moms up
<Hesh> tell her i want peppers and eggs for breakfast
<zephir> should i dcc that to you?
<zephir> ./dcc send hesh peppersandeggs.food |
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Quote: 48713; Rating: 406; [+|-]
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<FreakingNeo> 20.u00a0 Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia is a fear of ____?
<Qualjyn> long words
<FreakingNeo> Winner: Qualjyn Answer: long words Time: 4.265 Streak: 1 Points: 114 WPM: 28 Rank: 2nd
<FreakingNeo> O_O |
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Quote: 48714; Rating: 183; [+|-]
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<chickenpotpie> i'm gunna make a porn rpg
<Spoon> what would happen when you leveled up?
<chickenpotpie> you'd get a better sex toy
<BlackRaven> Chrisetn...u00a0 Amarthdae..u00a0 Kardelian.. Erandir... and Zelendrile all go off and have fun in that cave that they were in before they went to the castle on the shore..
<Spoon> Ass_Master leveled up!u00a0 Ass_Master learned [Doggie Style]! |
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Quote: 48715; Rating: -19; [+|-]
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<+Azul_Leon2k2> <sigh>
<+Azul_Leon2k2> anybody know how to get cat blood off your suede shoes???
<+Azul_Leon2k2> nobody?
<+Azul_Leon2k2> u_u
<+Azul_Leon2k2> damn furry football |
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Quote: 48716; Rating: 215; [+|-]
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<APE_> ive only got 34mb free
<APE_> out of 1.18gb
<ibor132> hah, ape u need a bigger drive
<APE_> yeh i know
<APE_> my drive is slowly filling up with temporary internet files porn and irc logs
<ibor132> hah, at least its important stuff |
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Quote: 48717; Rating: 655; [+|-]
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<sacarna> okay. so i was in whitcoulls and i walked out and smacked into this guy and i was all ready to go grr and looked up and it was the guy i have the biggest crush on ever
<sacarna> and my face went white
<sacarna> and then i kinda managed to muster up a hey
<sacarna> and then scuttled away
<sacarna> hopefully he will think its all very cute and fuck my brains out.
<autistk> it's hard to fuck people when they're running away
<autistk> and you tend to go to jail for it |
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Quote: 48718; Rating: 9; [+|-]
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<ZeroHour> Descender: get a real mans gun
<brenden> hah
<Descender> your penis?
<ZeroHour> damn right!
<NoiZe> lol
<ZeroHour> put it in your eye!
<stupidnick_> lol
<ZeroHour> WATCH IT SHOOT! |
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Quote: 48719; Rating: 142; [+|-]
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<Saiy> Got a job yet Mr Blazey?
<BigGeorgieB> He's on irc. guess. : |
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Quote: 48720; Rating: 482; [+|-]
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<KenKaniff> Snow
<KenKaniff> MSH?
<kisama> sure
<kisama> only 15 minutes though
<kisama> i tricked my roommate into leaving
<kisama> so i could fucking wack it
<KenKaniff> HAHA
<KenKaniff> Dood
<KenKaniff> Whack it
<KenKaniff> Then we'll play
<kisama> already did
<KenKaniff> Oh
<KenKaniff> So why 15 minutes?
<kisama> he's coming back in an hour
<KenKaniff> So what?
<KenKaniff> Why cant you play when hes there
<jestuh> cause it's cuddle time then
<jestuh> ;x! |
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Quote: 48728; Rating: 139; [+|-]
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note: Jdun is from Moldova
<Puchu> www.manhole.com
<Puchu> go there jdun
<Puchu> lots of hot women
<Puchu> for all your underground slavic women needs
<Jdun> we are not slavic
<Puchu> whatever
<Puchu> balkan then
<Jdun> not balkan
<Puchu> must...give...label....
<Gin> commie
<Gin> :)
<Puchu> YES |
|