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Quote: 10764; Rating: 215; |
<Falcon> bk is your name turd mcturdburger. fuck you.
<bk> what why did you just go off on me
<bk> when we are clearly best friends for life
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Quote: 10767; Rating: 990; |
<angie> yea, finally finished moving all my stuff in today.
<guyen> can't be that bad, she's pretty hot. i could tap dat azz all day
<guyen> godamn i need a picture of her so i can at least jerk off to it
<angie> isn't she in your class, just stare at her with your photographic memory.
<guyen> believe me i do, she's got an azzzzzzz
<angie> she's also right behind me.
<guyen> are you serious?
<angie> yea. she says you're pretty cute too. says you should have the balls to ask her out though.
<guyen> um, will you go out with me?
<angie> she says yes. pick her up tomm 7:30 after her evening class, she wants to see kate and leopold or whatever.
<guyen> are you kidding me? holy shit! im calling your house now
<angie> no i'm just fucking with you.
<guyen> your're a bitch you know that
<angie> i know.
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Quote: 10768; Rating: 75; |
<@haleguu> I cant believe RKelly has more kids out
<@haleguu> err vids
<spookz[d34dNb3d]> what
<spookz[d34dNb3d]> lol
<spookz[d34dNb3d]> what vid does he have out now?
<@Tama|LongVacation> the one where hes humping little 13 year olds
<spookz[d34dNb3d]> is it called "i am a lolicon" ft 14yr olds
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Quote: 10769; Rating: 3; |
<Ozzy|> whoa, now i understand why its cheaper to build your own comp
<Rufio]LK[> explain your reason
* Rufio]LK[ drinks his milk so it can come out his nose :P
<Ozzy|> haha
<Rufio]LK[> hurry, i wanna hear why :P
<Ozzy|> ok, cuz i thought the motherboard costs the most... but i'm lookin at em here and its only around $30
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Quote: 10772; Rating: -6; |
<CiaAgent> if worldcom goes under they will have to close the internet
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Quote: 10774; Rating: 1869; |
<guyen> so she gets pulled over, and as the bike cop walks up to her, she asks "are you going to at least try to sell me a ticket to the highway patrolmen's ball?"
<guyen> then the cop goes "highway patrolmen don't have balls, ma'am"
<guyen> and she busts out laughing, he finally gets it and just turns around, gets on his bike, and rides away without another word
<guyen> she just sits in her car laughing for like five minutes before she starts her car again
<guyen> shit, if i'd try to say something like that he would have gone LAPD on my ass
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Quote: 10781; Rating: 269; |
<Jed_D`Lagged> I don' tknow, I really woulden't want a penis I coulden't hide under my desk.
<Jed_D`Lagged> Or one that would take more than one hand to masturbate
<Farnarcle> did i miss something
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Quote: 10783; Rating: 676; |
<gr0undh0g> I spent an hour and a half once trying to tie a hair to a fly
<kritical> whyd you do that?
<gr0undh0g> so I could have a pet
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Quote: 10785; Rating: 507; |
<rogers> hahah
<guyen> roger: i love you man
<guyen> and by "love" i mean that special "stab you in the face and shit down your throat" love
<rogers> i love you too man
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Quote: 10793; Rating: 92; |
<CrushWork> hes got that "im a barbarin caveman who eats snails and says ooga booga" style look to him
<Jed> "I'm a barbarian caveman that eats snails, says ooga booga and lays cable for a living"
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Quote: 10798; Rating: 1778; [+|-]
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<Sparky> My new years resolution is 1280x1024.
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Quote: 10805; Rating: 223; |
dsp/#nz2600 boggles at chick logic , "i know you're upset with me, and that
upsets me, which is why i'm bitchy at you"
-dsp, nz2600
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Quote: 10809; Rating: 384; |
<Leb> I'VE BLOODY WELL FORGOTTEN WHAT I HAD INTENDED TO DO
<Leb> though i have a sneaking suspicion that it involves an immense iron penis
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Quote: 10811; Rating: 648; |
<MadMax> I'm going to buy myself another 6 80GB Seagate Barracuda IV's :D
<MadMax> That way, I can set up a 1/2 Terrabyte array
<MadMax> Wouldn't that be incredibly cool?!
* Altariel looks at MadMax and shakes her head
<Altariel> thats a penis thing, isnt it.
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Quote: 10815; Rating: 229; [+|-]
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Topic is 'Your mom has sex with sharks.' *** <Drewtig> oh SHIT, that's fucked up =D * Drewtig 's mom read that, and said: "Yeah, but he was more like a weasel that thought he was a shark."
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Quote: 10820; Rating: 244; |
<mdgslve> Zeek the only good thing about sheep is if you get em close enough to a cliff they push back really hard :)
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Quote: 10822; Rating: 160; |
<deniro> Happy to hear that the french lost the world cup already!
<deniro> Next time football will pop up into conversation, those french bastards will pretend an urgent pee to go cry in the toilets instead of being arrogant as usual
<bloom> Aren't you french?
<deniro> Well... don't tell anyone ok?
<deniro> I don't want anybody to think I must have some kind of disease to go so often in the toilets for the next 4 years...
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Quote: 10824; Rating: 142; |
<Hellwarrior> I bet I can suck my own dick
<Hellwarrior> one sec
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Quote: 10828; Rating: 206; |
<MeTh|pizzza> ack! i think some1 is tryin 2 break into my house! i just saw a kladder go by the window...
<ddrfreak> really?
<MeTh|pizzza> in other chan...
<ddrfreak> somoene is trying to break into your house in the other channel?
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Quote: 10829; Rating: 9; |
<BLAiR`o_o> does anyone know how i can make it so that my keyboard permenently holds down p?
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Quote: 10834; Rating: 204; |
<Pikapi> but microsoft doesn't sell windows for macintosh?
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Quote: 10837; Rating: 215; [+|-]
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<Keeper> ooooh, another dead mouse
<Keeper> I think it was a radioactive mouse too, cos as soon as the mousetrap snapped, the TV reception died for a second
<Deke> keeper has mice?
<Keeper> not anymore :P
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Quote: 10842; Rating: 1800; |
<Aegis> Dude this chick said she wouldn't give me head because she doesn't do that
<Vyse> They still make those?
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Quote: 10844; Rating: 137; |
<Don Ravioli> you hear about [M]?
<Xav> you mean about how it's full of rampant homosexuals?
<Xav> yeah i heard, bad news man.
<Don Ravioli> haha
<Don Ravioli> why bad news?
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Quote: 10846; Rating: 744; |
<Saccy> My password is alpha numeric.
<Strife> Well mine's a mixture of numbers AND letters.
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Quote: 10848; Rating: 223; |
<Art`> Howabout you hold your racquet like your cock?
<Saccy> You mean double-handed?
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Quote: 10852; Rating: 132; |
<yuu_> Am I lagged?
<el_wado> hard to tell, maybe you're just slow
<yuu_> feh
<el_wado> try responding to this: are you gay?
<yuu_> are you not funny?
<yuu_> how about just pinging me.. that would be simple
<el_wado> hmmm your delay could be interpreted as lag or underlying homosexual tendencies
-> [yuu_] PING
[yuu_ PING reply]: 1sec
<el_wado> 1 second - I suggest blatent homosexual
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Quote: 10853; Rating: 810; |
<_orion> I love escelators, they can never break, only temporarially turn into stairs
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Quote: 10859; Rating: 138; [+|-]
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<BigTongue> man, look at this slut on the price is right... bob barker is having a viagra attack
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Quote: 10860; Rating: 859; |
<rds|squall> im italian plz help me
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Quote: 10862; Rating: 332; [+|-]
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<Danelope> This contract doesn't involve sodomy, does it?
<harb> actually
<harb> damnit
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Quote: 10868; Rating: 103; [+|-]
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<SimonB> .se servers have been quite stable lately
<luna_s> ok so swedish servers are the best ok ok ok
<SimonB> I like webgiro
<luna_s> demons fine most of the time
<luna_s> until a pissed up engineer spills his can on a router
<SimonB> :D
<SimonB> until? its more of a rule than an exception
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Quote: 10869; Rating: 615; |
<Stuckie> I had to sit through the Sound of Music for TWO FRIGGIN weeks.. bloody school shows... probably why I've cracked... lol
<Stuckie> The hiiiiiills are aliiiiiive with the sound of **BANG!!** DIE YOU BASTARDS!!! **BANG!!**
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Quote: 10877; Rating: 269; |
<Vod> that sentence is even more screwed up than even mine usual are
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Quote: 10879; Rating: 474; |
ZangTT> the earth IS flat. it just stuffs its bra.
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Quote: 10880; Rating: 259; |
<jorm> if you have to ally yourself with a subculture that likes bad music and shitty drugs, you might as well go with the one where you're more likely to get laid.
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Quote: 10881; Rating: 277; |
<jorm> it will be my favorite thing until i remember that i have a penis.
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Quote: 10882; Rating: 156; |
<jorm> i want to get laid. look out, world.
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Quote: 10883; Rating: 228; |
<jorm> fuck freedom. freedom is for weenies.
<jorm> COOL people want to be oppressed.
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Quote: 10889; Rating: 103; |
<nwinter> well, there are solutions to getting rid of nads, eric.
<nwinter> i have a fork and a rusty corkscrew. let's do it.
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Quote: 10890; Rating: 553; |
<gldnmean> I always thought "The sound of one hand clapping" would be good zen masturbation slang
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Quote: 10892; Rating: 449; |
<Random> "You're so sweet, and intelligent. What's your name?" "Jeremy." "Isn't that male?" "Yes." "AAAAH STAB STAB STAB STAB NEVER STOP STABBING I HATE YOU KILL YOU KILL MOMMY KILL KILL." <--- Online lesbians are fun.
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Quote: 10893; Rating: 196; |
<octal> i think meeting lots of cute/etc. girls is easier if you're deaf and thus can tolerate raves.
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Quote: 10894; Rating: 553; |
<Starscream> uh
<Starscream> i just accidentally told my credit card company i was smoking crack
<Starscream> shit.
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Quote: 10899; Rating: 71; |
<StrScream> there is definitely not NEARLY enough dick being licked.
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Quote: 10904; Rating: 319; [+|-]
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<StrScream> my pants are back up, after almost no downtime in the last 2 years.
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Quote: 10906; Rating: 21; |
<Helly> My sister is Jewish by injection, dammit! I mean...uhhh
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Quote: 10908; Rating: 263; |
<StrScream> jeremy: as long as you're going postal, can you find out why I haven't gotten any mail for 3 days?
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Quote: 10910; Rating: 1153; |
<LabMonkey> ok riddle me this
<LabMonkey> I open the pack of cigarettes
<LabMonkey> pull out one
<LabMonkey> pick up my lighter
<LabMonkey> put the cigarette back in the pack
<LabMonkey> then try to light my nose...
<LabMonkey> What the fuck, over.
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Quote: 10911; Rating: 113; |
<Xaotika> if i ever start a band, remind me to call it MY ASS.
<Xaotika> then you could all come watch MY ASS if we ever perform on stage.
<Xaotika> MY ASS will rock your world. i'm sure.
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