|
Quote: 466117; Rating: 843; [+|-]
|
wertis: im going to go pick up my brother
ubermensch: i perfer to pick up chicks but suit yourself
wertis: fuck you
|
|
Quote: 466122; Rating: 573; [+|-]
|
<SPEEDing|VoNK> you cant use knoppix as a server can you?
<bob> why not? people use windows as one.
|
|
Quote: 466257; Rating: 1134; [+|-]
|
<vrit> oh god damn, that beer just suddenly snuck up on my bladder all special-ops style
<vrit> it was all metal beer solid
|
|
Quote: 466283; Rating: 254; [+|-]
|
A78Gamer: BEFORE YOU DIE, YOU SEE THE RING
A78Gamer: Just like Owen Hart.
|
|
Quote: 466405; Rating: 1181; [+|-]
|
(@Phaysis) anyone here ever taken yoga classes?
(@tesko) yes, and i stopped when i learned i couldnt breathe fire
|
|
Quote: 466531; Rating: 768; [+|-]
|
* Bassfiend flicks to "The Avengers" for a bit of Uma...
< planetWayne> nah - shes a bit ... ugly..
< planetWayne> although I liked killbill#
* Bassfiend doesn't want to talk to planetWayne ever again.
< Bassfiend> Uma is my love!!!
< planetWayne> her eyes are not set properly.
< Bassfiend> Correct ...
< Bassfiend> ... they should be four inches above the level of my penis.
|
|
Quote: 466715; Rating: 1787; [+|-]
|
<[56k]holtzboy> who hates metallica's st. anger cd? me me me me me
<cockmonster> geez, 56kers, you even lag in real life
<cockmonster> we all got done bitching about that CD months ago
<Frenchman`> cockmonster, he just finished downloading it
|
|
Quote: 467125; Rating: 1086; [+|-]
|
pinano: The angle of the dangle is directly proportional to the
pinano: heat of the meat, as augmented by the thrust of the bust,
pinano: and inversely so to the mass of the ass, so long as the
pinano: bore of the whore remains constant.
pinano: God, I love being an engineer.
|
|
Quote: 467252; Rating: 1524; [+|-]
|
Mandy: The baby's kickin'.
Adam: well kick that little fucker back.
Adam: gotta start early with discipline
|
|
Quote: 467485; Rating: 868; [+|-]
|
<|an> ok so whos got some nice anagrams of their name then?
<|an> ian hamilton
<mark-> him into anal
|
|
Quote: 467640; Rating: 794; [+|-]
|
<MickXII> Spider-man creator Stan Lee awarded 10 percent of profits from movies. With 10 percent profit, there must come 10 percent responsibility
|
|
Quote: 467883; Rating: 504; [+|-]
|
* Amon rocks out to Guns N Roses - Sweet Child O' Mine
<Amon> this song owns
<r0bz0r> It does
<Amon> ;)
<r0bz0r> I'm surprised michael jackson didn't do a remake
|
|
Quote: 468705; Rating: 633; [+|-]
|
<Moltar> jesus says turn the other cheek
<YouAgain> thats why jesus is dead
|
|
Quote: 469064; Rating: 2083; [+|-]
|
Anonymous-san: okay so there's these two strings, right
Anonymous-san: They walk into a bar
Anonymous-san: The first string says
Anonymous-san: Hello, I'd like a rum and cokerhe7954454gh2kjn.,.43>>[][]21?24
Anonymous-san: The second string says
Anonymous-san: You'll have to excuse my friend, he's not null-terminated
|
|
Quote: 469107; Rating: 2372; [+|-]
|
<RvLeshrac> <Terrorists> Shit, maybe we shouldn't take hostages from countries whose people are more insane than us.
<RvLeshrac> <China> You give back hostages, or we kill all muslim.
<NegaDuk> i think if they piss off china too much, they'll find that china, the US, and britain will turn the middle east into a big walmart parking lot
<RvLeshrac> <China> We use nuke. What we care you nuke us? We have billion more people.
<NegaDuk> <China> nuke beijing. we tried sars. it no work
<RvLeshrac> <China> We stop birth restriction, we make billion more. Three day.
<NegaDuk> i think china's just being antisocial so someone will thin their population
<RvLeshrac> Seriously.
<RvLeshrac> China's answer to anything should be "We stop birth restrictions"
<RvLeshrac> <US> Stop flooding our markets with cheap goods, or we stop selling you soybeans. <China> We stop birth restriction! <US> Fuck. OK, OK! You can have the damned soybeans!
<RvLeshrac> I bet that was the real reason Clinton gave them our satellite codes.
<RvLeshrac> <China> You give us code, or we flood world with chinese!
<RvLeshrac> <China> All your shirt shrink up like penis in arctic.
<NightStar> damn those bad chinese laundry places
<RvLeshrac> <China> You never get decent haircut. You explain to women why no manicure.
<RvLeshrac> <China> We own you like Hong Kong.
|
|
Quote: 469543; Rating: 1067; [+|-]
|
<tanuki> FunkyMonkey: I have a friend who tried shitting out of a tree stand while hunting
<tanuki> he dropped his coveralls, hung his ass over the side, and let fly... but when he was done, he went to zip up the coveralls, flipped the hood up...
<tanuki> *thwack*
<tanuki> he ended up shitting in the hood of his coveralls without realizing it
|
|
Quote: 469974; Rating: 1479; [+|-]
|
piratebot4: oh man
piratebot4: my friend
piratebot4: this really nice black girl
piratebot4: her name is regina
piratebot4: well, in class they were writting their names backwards
piratebot4: and she realized
piratebot4: regina
piratebot4: a niger
|
|
Quote: 470021; Rating: 1300; [+|-]
|
<ptp`R-N-C`efegege> how many emo kids does it take to change a lightbulb?
<The_only_Vanilla_Willy> HOW MANY?!
<ptp`R-N-C`efegege> none they just sit in the dark and cry
|
|
Quote: 471055; Rating: 1851; [+|-]
|
<Lyme> I got Fight Club for 6.98 at walmart.
<Black_Bishop> I am Jack's low price guarantee
|
|
Quote: 471421; Rating: -8; [+|-]
|
DorianB81: jesus was a humble man
DorianB81: hed drive a ford focus
|
|
Quote: 471438; Rating: 457; [+|-]
|
<Superlan> Cannabis brownies: the breakfast, second breakfast, brunch, lunch, tea time, dinner, dessert, and midnight snack of champions.
|
|
Quote: 471449; Rating: 2112; [+|-]
|
<ppg> if guns kill people
<ppg> then pencils misspell words
<ppg> and cars make people drive drunk
<ppg> and spoons made rosie o'donnell fat
|
|
Quote: 471643; Rating: 621; [+|-]
|
<jiffy> you ever squeezed your penis really hard and watch it change colors?
<Illusory> I seem to be missing a penis. Can I try yours?
|
|
Quote: 471819; Rating: 983; [+|-]
|
bag0fice: man they need to add a pothead difficulty to games
swindLer: x;
bag0ice: where you cant lose and the music never stops
|
|
Quote: 472471; Rating: -239; [+|-]
|
<NASDAQbastardo> Black Mesa is nothing but a Gungan minority
|
|
Quote: 472858; Rating: 743; [+|-]
|
<dan> this one dude made a raytraced monopoly board, and it looked just like a photo!
<GreenPenInc> url?
<dan> i forget =[
<GreenPenInc> ok I'll find it
<GreenPenInc> ...heh
<GreenPenInc> i'm googling for monopoly and all I get is people bitching about microsoft :D
|
|
Quote: 472869; Rating: 793; [+|-]
|
* X sets mode: +b *!*@68.68.*
* s0ur was kicked by X ((collindavis) you were warned)
<@SJr|Tecra> Right now, with cbdavis's latest ban about 3/65536th of the net is banned from this channel.
<@SJr|Tecra> doesn't banning a /16 raise ethical and moral issues about prejudice, stereotyping, and netmaskism, descrimination against people based on there network address? How can we as moral human beings condone such activities? Whats the difference between banning someone who thru no events but fate is given
68.68. as an ip address, versus someone who thru no events as fate is given dark skin? In the latter we did
<@SJr|Tecra> but no longer condone such activites such as prejudice. It would be incorrect to say that one is more likely to commit a crime based on the skin color, but doesn't society move so slowly that we still find it ethical and moral to say that based on someones netmask they are going to be a spammer.
<@cd|work> it's IRC bitch - stfu
<@cd|work> you're about to see a *.ca ban if you don't shut up :)
<@SJr|Tecra> didn't hitler say that about Germany, cd|work?
<@SJr|Tecra> Hitler to Chaimberlain: it's germany - stfu
|
|
Quote: 473246; Rating: 2492; [+|-]
|
<JustinArthur> I used to surf up the interweb and IRC in Windows 3.11 on a an AMD 80386DX 40MHz edition.
<skyfire> JA: after walking three miles through waist deep snow, up hill, when it was -40 outside just to get to your computer :P
<JustinArthur> Shit, back then, we had to use TCP/IP over smoke signal protocol.
<Nikolai> Why the hell was your computer on top of a hill in waist-deep snow? O.o
<Lorentz> Why not?
<skyfire> smoke signal protocol!?!
<skyfire> in my day, we used a log and two sticks
<JustinArthur> Yup, someone would be at the fire on the hill with a blanket and yell out the 0s and 1s to the guy whose turn it was to be demodulator.
<skyfire> we just pounded them out on the log with our demodulator writing it down with charcoal
<skyfire> of course, noise was always a problem
<skyfire> lousy october gales
<skyfire> we were droping smoke packets like there was no tomorrow
<skyfire> then we came up with the idea of broadband over forest fire
<skyfire> that didn't work very well
<skyfire> I mean, we got the blazing speed we expected
<skyfire> unfortunately, we had a tendency to burn out the modems =/
|
|
Quote: 473330; Rating: -247; [+|-]
|
< pigeon> what does "half chest" mean when it comes to t-shirt measurement?
<@raster> they had breast cancer?
|
|
Quote: 473599; Rating: 5967; [+|-]
|
Mjordan2nd: If you could be any fictional character, who would you be?
Chris: Spider Man
Tim: batman
Sidd: batman
Mjordan2nd: I'd be god
|
|
Quote: 474123; Rating: 913; [+|-]
|
mdvb: Matt, you not watching the State of the Union?
strestout1: ill tell u the state of the union
strestout1: we're losing jobs, the economy is going to shyt, the whole world hates us
strestout1: god bless america
strestout1: the end
|
|
Quote: 474527; Rating: 116; [+|-]
|
Grotw8: whats strong enough for a man but built for a woman?
Grotw8: the back of my hand
|
|
Quote: 474559; Rating: 1719; [+|-]
|
<Spazz`> I know that I'm supposed to respect my neighbors' culture because they're hispanic, but I wish that wifebeating was a little quieter.
|
|
Quote: 474894; Rating: 1073; [+|-]
|
<Sefy> Dude, if the FBI ever came to my door
<Sefy> Im just gonna put in my other harddrive and boot in ME
<Sefy> Just so i look like a complete retard
|
|
Quote: 475174; Rating: 574; [+|-]
|
<Ashpool> I have offically reached full bachelorhood. Use a plate...then chuck it out.
<SirPNut> sif need plate.. eat it straight from the frypan
<@Agg> plate? pfft, amateur. when you eat directly off the table, magazines, chairs, etc..
<SirPNut> then throw the frypan out
<@aftahours> cook everything in the one pot, drain the pot then eat outta the pot :) tastes better that way
<@Agg> or with my cooking, pour the food out of the pot and eat the pot, it's more tasty
|
|
Quote: 475199; Rating: 3206; [+|-]
|
<Korras> friendship among women: one doesn't come home one night, and tells her bf that she spent the night with a female friend of hers. bf calls 10 of her friends, and none know a thing.
<Korras> friendship amongst men: same thing happens. man says he spent the night at a friends place. gf calls 10 of his friends. 8 confirm he has been there, and the two others say he's still there.
|
|
Quote: 475913; Rating: 2218; [+|-]
|
<Insomniak> ow owow
<Insomniak> ow
<Insomniak> i hit myself in the nuts playing air guitar
<Insomniak> again
<nxn> darwin is hard at work
|
|
Quote: 475919; Rating: 2242; [+|-]
|
<Stryyp> im never stopping for small animals crossing the road again
<Stryyp> i hit on the brakes and almost wrecked.
<Stryyp> the little bastard sits there and stares at me for a minute, then continues to cross the road
<Stryyp> and out of nowhere a truck comes from the other direction and pancakes the sucker
|
|
Quote: 475920; Rating: 1677; [+|-]
|
<Kira> Tuesday was Groundhog Day and the State of the Union Address. As Air America Radio pointed out, it is an ironic juxtaposition: one involves a meaningless ritual in which we look to a creature of little intelligence for prognostication and the other involves a groundhog.
|
|
Quote: 475930; Rating: 1221; [+|-]
|
The Great Ookami: you mad with me pup?
Kyouto Hasuki: i dont think so
Kyouto Hasuki: lemme check my log
|
|
Quote: 476045; Rating: 703; [+|-]
|
anotlwonk: I have a whole bunch of web designs and no one to give them to
crazyc0der: i smell an emo song brewing
|
|
Quote: 476276; Rating: 866; [+|-]
|
UltimateGuidoAnchovy: Livejournal recently realized that it could save bandwidth by eliminating all mood emoticons but "angsty".
|
|
Quote: 476571; Rating: 1582; [+|-]
|
<MacMantis> oh christ. a friend of mine just got another of his mothers world breaking text messages.
<MacMantis> 'GDAD DIED 5AM -MUMX'
<MacMantis> I honestly do wonder what is wrong with the woman.
|
|
Quote: 476808; Rating: 748; [+|-]
|
<Khabi> Night. Don't let the bed bug bite.
<Groverton> Bed bug?
<Khabi> Yeah, there's just one, but he's FUCKING HUGE!
|
|
Quote: 477397; Rating: 1525; [+|-]
|
<Vash> /ctcp Bot doit passwd <command>
<Vash> try it!
<Kao> okay
-> [Bot] DOIT passwd msg #scripting I love babies
<bot> I love babies
-> [Bot] DOIT passwd /run shutdown -r -t 3 -c "byeeeee"
<Vash> ohhh
* Vash has quit IRC (Connection reset by peer)
* Bot has quit IRC (Connection reset by peer)
|
|
Quote: 477474; Rating: 1425; [+|-]
|
<Dashiva> i wonder if crips get pissy if someone picks out the wrong shade of blue
<Dashiva> 'I know you ain't frontin' with that periwinkle'
<^Asphyx> "Cyan? Niggah please."
|
|
Quote: 477771; Rating: 1281; [+|-]
|
(ArmanyGirl) Impuro, describe yourself to me
([Impuro]) well, I have 2 arms, 2 legs, a torso, a head with a nose and eyes and etc...
(ArmanyGirl) duhh, i mean phisically
|
|
Quote: 477843; Rating: 501; [+|-]
|
<@LZ|5133p> gonna have to rebuild my fish tank tomorrow
<@LZ|5133p> getting a new filter
<@LZ|5133p> and fish
<+Toba> pkg_delete fish-tank-1.0.23b
<+Toba> cd /usr/ports/fish/fish-tank-1.2.43c
<+Toba> make all install clean -WITH_FILTER -WITH_FISH
|
|
Quote: 477879; Rating: 151; [+|-]
|
<sme> i want an easier girlfriend :(
<sme> it's too hard
<sme> its on nightmare atm
<sme> need an 'i can win' girlfriend
<Kamikazee> /god
|
|
Quote: 478173; Rating: 862; [+|-]
|
<RaveZeroX> stupid me put the square root of 50 as 25 instead of 7.1......
<GuiltySpark> o.O
<GuiltySpark> Temporary retardation?
<RaveZeroX> i guess u can call it that.... >_>
<GuiltySpark> That would SO be a good card for a "Hax0r: Teh 1337 trading card game"
<GuiltySpark> Temporary Retardation: Target creature becomes AOLer
|
|