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Quote: 146063; Rating: 896; [+|-]
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<Volksweasel> cool...there's a TON of cardinals on the tree outside my window
<enaz> cardinals are usually safe, it's the priests you have to watch out for |
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Quote: 146073; Rating: 1994; [+|-]
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<BChikapa> wan 2 cybar?
<Calisa> We have sex three times, it's fun, I get pregnant, Jimmy needs a daddy.
<BChikapa> I refuse to pay child support, and lengthy leagal battles ensue.
<Calisa> Jimmy becomes torn by his dashed hopes of having a father, so he murders you while you're sleeping on the job at the toll booth.
<BChikapa> All my family members despise me, and as a result no one has any money to pay for my disposal.
<BChikapa> I am unceremoniously dumped into the Hudson River, wrapped in a cheap plastic tarp. |
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Quote: 146075; Rating: 347; [+|-]
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<Fistandantilus> It's unpleasing, to see a bunch of xylophone ribs poking out the sides of a girl... I imagine it'd be like sticking my dick into a pillow sack full of greased coathangers. |
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Quote: 146190; Rating: 253; [+|-]
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<Shiv_TXS> are you having phone sex or something?
<Twiztid> no
<Twiztid> some girl answered |
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Quote: 146191; Rating: 244; [+|-]
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<FlypServ> ive only known two eq addicted people, one grew up and the other dumped me to work on her character |
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Quote: 146192; Rating: 69; [+|-]
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<Raptor> ---
<Raptor> very funny ad...
<Raptor> and is alien-homonoid coming to Gamecube or PS2 or both?
<Raptor> Because they are both very fine systems and X-Box,Well... It can rot in hell with Bill Gates, The evilest man to walk the earth.
<Raptor> ---
<Raptor> Yes, compared to Bill Gates, Ghengis Khan was a fucking saint, and don't even get me started on some Chinese Emperors and Stalin, they could be like fucking Jesus! God damn that Bill Gates is a plight upon man.
<Ross> Hey now, Ghengis Khan did a lot of good
<Ross> He made Russia rich, and re-opened the silk road
<Ross> AND he killed 800,000 arabs in a week |
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Quote: 146193; Rating: 648; [+|-]
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<I|O> goin off to college
<I|O> mom got me a dehumidifer
<I|O> dad got me a humidifier
<xiao> stick em in yer room for a night. let them fight it out |
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Quote: 146205; Rating: -190; [+|-]
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<BluePhoenix> I predict that in 500 years, everyone will be the same color.
<@Measure> well after we rocket all the blacks into the sun, sure |
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Quote: 146343; Rating: 719; [+|-]
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<[UMCP]TROGDOR> explain to me why i need to defragment my disk
<[UMCP]TROGDOR> whats the advantage
<[UMCP]commieboy> faster access speed
<[UMCP]commieboy> Saint Google may be to your aide.
<[UMCP]TROGDOR> it says its moving all my files
<[UMCP]commieboy> yessir
<[UMCP]TROGDOR> why
<[UMCP]TROGDOR> ill NEVER FIND THEM |
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Quote: 146402; Rating: 312; [+|-]
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(bigwurm) if your concerned about the ammount of cpu time an onboard sound card uses, you should really get a new cpu + mobo
(@|-ZenitH-|) or a life |
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Quote: 146425; Rating: 550; [+|-]
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<stray> i gotweed.net
<stray> im gonna gethigh.org
<drew-> havefun.com/youfuckingidiot |
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Quote: 146497; Rating: 7011; [+|-]
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<DemonEater> wtf
<DemonEater> ESPN is showing 2003 national jump rope championship
<DemonEater> who the hell watches jump rope competiti--- ooh bouncy |
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Quote: 146650; Rating: 426; [+|-]
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<HumanHead> :/
<HumanHead> I tried to pull a drew at Video Warehouse
<HumanHead> <me> Do you have any job openings?
<HumanHead> <guy> no positions are open right now
<HumanHead> <me> that only means one thing...SOMEONE MUST DIE
<HumanHead> *me is asked to leave |
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Quote: 146656; Rating: 1385; [+|-]
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<Errata> f y cn rd ths y cn gt gd jb n cmptr prgrmng |
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Quote: 146822; Rating: 1459; [+|-]
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(Bass_EXE): reminds me of this one time.. this girl said 'HA! and what would you guys do without us women?!' I just replied 'domesticate another animal.' |
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Quote: 146929; Rating: 142; [+|-]
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<@Oedipus> Hoe chit.
<@Oedipus> Another winning porno idea.
<@Oedipus> "The Crying Game"
<@Oedipus> We get some poor dude to come and do it with some chick.
<@Oedipus> When everything is getting all sexy and intimate they get naked.
<@Oedipus> BAM!
<@Oedipus> Shemale willy! |
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Quote: 146982; Rating: 311; [+|-]
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MasochisticAngyl: what i wouldn't give for some flesh or pancres covered in blood right now
XxJoeZeroxX: pancreas?
MasochisticAngyl: thank you for the correction
XxJoeZeroxX: wasnt intended as such, more as a question as to why this organ was singled out.
MasochisticAngyl: the sweetest one
XxJoeZeroxX: i somehow have the feeling being involved with you is going to get me in trouble one day. |
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Quote: 146984; Rating: 127; [+|-]
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<dsf> WHY DOSNT UNDO EXIST IN THE REAL WORLD ?
<dsf> or cut or paste or copy
<|M|R|> well that was my Question when my mom brought me to this world :D |
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Quote: 146989; Rating: 271; [+|-]
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<Entriech> Theatre tickets are 91$ at the cheapest?
<Entriech> Jesus Christ.
<Entriech> What do they think I am, made of money?
<Entriech> Cause even if I was, that's like sawing my dick in half for theatre tickets. |
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Quote: 146993; Rating: 218; [+|-]
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* Trust is back from "" (Away for 32330secs (08:58:50))
<elDiablo> O_O
* Trust is away "Upgrading Away Script" at Monday September 15th 2003 05:07:44pm GMT |
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Quote: 146994; Rating: 238; [+|-]
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<Monkey> Won't you take me to Funky Town?
<triple6> I'm not going that way, sorry. |
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Quote: 146996; Rating: 297; [+|-]
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<Ransid> i did tech support for a day before i quit when someone asked me whats double clicking |
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Quote: 147008; Rating: 242; [+|-]
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<curse|sleeeep> i think i'm calling in to work tomorrow
<curse|sleeeep> i'm coughing up things that aren't even mine
<Zomb-mar> next time spit and dont swallow |
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Quote: 147010; Rating: 299; [+|-]
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+icnocop> any advice on what program to use to compare two files like windiff or something?
@theForger> how aobut windiff
@Wyatt> huhuhu
@Wyatt> or something.
+icnocop> ok i guess it's good enough. thanks
+rottle> haha
+rottle> that was the most pointless thing ever |
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Quote: 147015; Rating: 273; [+|-]
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<Comanche> fuck off windows with your low dick space thing.
<Comanche> err. *disk :P
<Kim> LOL
<Comanche> typo :P
<xeon> lol, warning no dick found |
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Quote: 147016; Rating: 188; [+|-]
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<DAWg> AHHHHH!!!! hjorten kill my teacher....today's lesson is a intro to windows 2000
<DAWg> "this is a mouse"
<Hjorten> haha
<DAWg> "this is a monitor"
<DAWg> "ctrl+c copies"
<DAWg> fucking christ |
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Quote: 147017; Rating: 151; [+|-]
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<@ritual> life.
<@SharkDeath> Installed it about 20 minutes ago.
<@SharkDeath> Haven't played it yet tho.
<@ritual> got one hour 20 mins left on download |
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Quote: 147018; Rating: 323; [+|-]
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<x0b> hey
<@wrong> HI
<x0b> suh wrong
<x0b> everything alright
<x0b> or
<x0b> all wrong
<x0b> :P
<|iquid> haa haa
<|iquid> you're very funny x0b
<|iquid> painfully funny
<|iquid> I guess what I'm trying to say is that I want you to hang yourself. |
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Quote: 147020; Rating: 119; [+|-]
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<Pico> I might have to reinstall Win...I mean, GAYdows
<Killfrenzy> *snrk*
<Steve> Hey! I take offense to that!
<Steve> I have sucked MUCH less cock than Windows has! |
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Quote: 147026; Rating: 200; [+|-]
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Phazer: 24 Billion served?
Nic: Yeah, I'm that good.
Peter: Or, that easy. |
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Quote: 147027; Rating: 410; [+|-]
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*Isabel has entered #icybercafe
<whitemithrandir> OMG OMG OMG ISABEL ASL ASL ASL ASL
<isabel> Altitude: 6-52 meters above sealevel. Speed: 62 mi/hr. Location: Eastern seaboard.
<whitemithrandir> coo. wanna cyber?
*Isabel has left #icybercafe |
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Quote: 147029; Rating: 516; [+|-]
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<TriviaBot>u00a0 BIG.1372. Norse mythology: What killed Baldur ?
<TriviaBot>u00a0 1st Hint: *********u00a0u00a0 Question Value : 3 Points
<Darric> his gate
<kutuzov> a gate
<sheoul> lol
<Darric> lolol
<sheoul> NERDS! |
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Quote: 147182; Rating: 915; [+|-]
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<@Zero> adding an h next to an s in every word spices it up
<@Zero> shpanks, shandels, shaffire, shilly, shaddup
<Red_Baron> until you tell your dog to sit |
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Quote: 147236; Rating: 226; [+|-]
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<-yptosis> Hey, I took a picture of my wang like df did. Let me upload it.
<-yptosis> It'll take a bit, it is a 9 meg file. |
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Quote: 147245; Rating: 192; [+|-]
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BuXtonZer0: i dunno why its such a good combo
BuXtonZer0: the goldfish are crunchy and cheesy, while the coke is cold, refreshing, sweet, and breaks down the goldfish
Benihana420: and your teeth
Benihana420: at the same time
BuXtonZer0: another plus |
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Quote: 147249; Rating: 937; [+|-]
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<spender> listen gentlemen
<spender> i will tell you a tale
<spender> of an interesting proof
<spender> it came to me in a vision
<spender> it proceeds as follows:
<spender> Claim: The set of functions f : |N -> { 0, 1 } is uncountable
<spender> Proof:
* kronixx thinkz spender needs a gf
<spender> SILENCE |
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Quote: 147262; Rating: 162; [+|-]
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<Robotzombie> love is never having to say I wish you didn't have a nutsack
<Robotzombie> well, maybe it's not |
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Quote: 147265; Rating: 138; [+|-]
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<Firien> damn girls
* iBaller will never understand them
<Firien> they drive you round the bend
<Firien> and then charge you for the petrol :P
<iBaller> XD |
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Quote: 147270; Rating: 965; [+|-]
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<pronstar``afk> my kazaa preformed an illegal opperation
<cCCPehlet`> isn't that what kazaa is designed to do? |
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Quote: 147273; Rating: 388; [+|-]
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onkeybutt87: I have no work ethic
onkeybutt87: or ethics
onkeybutt87: in a related note, I'm going to go hit babies |
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Quote: 147274; Rating: 252; [+|-]
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Dieldo: Heh no way, the best is Tantric sex
AnalRetribuiton: well i am the master of something i have come to call
AnalRetribuiton: wtf'ing
AnalRetribuiton: it's where i have sex with a girl finish in 3 seconds and she goes "what the fuck?"
Dieldo: Lol |
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Quote: 147275; Rating: 446; [+|-]
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<{gy}IRONMAN> I don't think Arnold will be elected.
<{gy}IRONMAN> Being a movie star isn't enough. We saw that with Reagan
<Paralysis> Damn, and all this time I thought Reagan got elected |
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Quote: 147278; Rating: 681; [+|-]
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<bleak> ablsh vwls! vwls r spm!
<bleak> t's wll knwn fct tht vwls s t mch bndwdth
<Alanna> bleak: OMG, for a moment there I thought that you had learned Welsh |
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Quote: 147279; Rating: 185; [+|-]
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* hunterkll kneels and prays liek a good knight
<hunterkll> hunterkll: you have earned 10 virtue points and 5 strengthpoints
<hunterkll> and access to two hints
<hunterkll> heh :D
<jgannon> However, you still have -8 charisma. |
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Quote: 147320; Rating: 594; [+|-]
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<Crispy`> My teacher let me Clear the junk off the student computers in class today. Total AIM Buddy Lists cleared for good: 5 Total videos of kiddy porn deleted: 3 Total MILF Hunter videos deleted: 4 Total Virus games downloaded off kazaa in hopes it will be the right game: 7 Knowing I'm not alone: Priceless. |
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Quote: 147463; Rating: 1279; [+|-]
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<Zap> back from raev lol.
<Protected> raev?
<Gray|ogl> raev = a codename for gaybar, only gaypeople know about it
<Gray|ogl> doh. |
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Quote: 147493; Rating: 314; [+|-]
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<-yper-orse> mamma mia
<-yper-orse> my my
<-yper-orse> i cannot resist u
<-yper-orse> mamma mia
<Squeeks> "With Dragon Voice, you too can flood IRC Channels as you sing to ABBA" |
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Quote: 147497; Rating: 424; [+|-]
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<Suiko> how the fuck could a search for 'final fantasy 7 manga' bring up 'harry potter yaoi' |
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Quote: 147498; Rating: 306; [+|-]
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<mungbean> using VB is like masturbating with a cheese grater. |
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Quote: 147503; Rating: 589; [+|-]
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<Lisy-lis> ..am I a geek for trying to make the top quotes on bash have exactly 1337 votes? |
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