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Quote: 44892; Rating: 526; [+|-]
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<htedrom> o youz b3 1 d3d m0th4fuck4
<Cyrus> ladies and gentlemen, i point out the product of today's society
* Cyrus points to htedrom
* nullroot slaps a "As Seen On MTV" sticker on htedrom
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Quote: 44900; Rating: 275; [+|-]
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<Marvin> I've found one, and only one practical application for "13375p33k"
<Marvin> secure passwords
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Quote: 44906; Rating: -280; [+|-]
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<uiop> go read a book with that guy from star trek
<pork> which one
<pork> DOUG MULRAY DOUG MULRAY
<uiop> that black one, who was always reading on PBS
<uiop> take a look, its in a book, a reading negro.
<pork> oh him
<jre-la> CONCLUSION: there's only one negro that can read
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Quote: 44916; Rating: 170; [+|-]
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<Thamwlad> i'll attempt to disbelieve the floor
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Quote: 44917; Rating: 132; [+|-]
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<Kosta> I'm paying for 4 different hot chicks' EQ accounts in the hopes that one of them will put out.
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Quote: 44922; Rating: 365; [+|-]
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<j4yj0hn> oh, a kid in my class got called to the office for stalking a girl
<Threeboy> strange kids.
<j4yj0hn> she caught him in her yard with a camera
<Threeboy> just say it was a project.
<Threeboy> unless he was naked.
<Threeboy> then say it was an ART project.
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Quote: 44923; Rating: 217; [+|-]
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<sm4k> i wish you could record dreams
<sm4k> i'd have the best porn
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Quote: 44931; Rating: 763; [+|-]
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<NapkinEater> I had a dream about a game show where parents compete to see who can keep their baby in the freezer the longest.
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Quote: 44932; Rating: 245; [+|-]
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<Ophiel> someone asked me if LOL was a different version of AOL :O
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Quote: 44938; Rating: 28; [+|-]
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<StoneColdSpider> YAY IM FINALY BACK ON FFS!!!!!
<k> worst 5 mins of your life eh scs
<k> you missed
<k> [16:30] *** Spazz ([email protected].***) has joined #NV
<k> [16:35] *** Spazz ([email protected].***) has left #NV
<k> ;p
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Quote: 44940; Rating: 8; [+|-]
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surfichris: hey, do u know c++
surfichris: or c
Kasper_2010: well, i can see, i dont know about the ++ bit
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Quote: 44953; Rating: 104; [+|-]
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<wolfstg> I stopped watching wrestling when i got gay.
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Quote: 44964; Rating: -32; [+|-]
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<Musc> hm
<Musc> a dog with a fatty p00n would clearly be preferable to assraping a male dog
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Quote: 44969; Rating: 249; [+|-]
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<nroklost> your life is a lie
<somery> dood i'm just talkin' about your mullet, don't get all existential on me
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Quote: 44977; Rating: 336; [+|-]
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<LARZ_GOD_ME> lets see back 2 gta3 or back to studing
<LARZ_GOD_ME> which one
<darque9> considering your spelling, i'd say "studing"
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Quote: 44983; Rating: -6; [+|-]
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<eDRoaCH-nothere> akuma noticed me
<Nariz> "noticed" you? so you were hiding and he saw your big ass behind the curtians?
<Nariz> you should never hide behind the curtians
<Nariz> i've tried it before, it doesn't work...
Nariz was kicked by eDRoaCH-nothere (/notice Nariz ur an idiot)
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Quote: 44985; Rating: 993; [+|-]
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<LieparDestin> i challenged god to a duel once
<LieparDestin> the next day my rabbit died
<LieparDestin> i guess i lost :(
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Quote: 44990; Rating: 139; [+|-]
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<je> my PC died completely as it booted tonight .. lights come on but nothing happens
<je> now I'm stuck with ye olde PC that doesn't even have a good enough vid card to show flesh tones
<reverend> stop looking at pr0n
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Quote: 44999; Rating: 310; [+|-]
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<HSOK> my dad just came up stairs, he said i was playing my music too loud
<HSOK> im using headphones
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Quote: 45007; Rating: 360; [+|-]
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<fats> whats a kernel?
<_astrodz_> kernel is the man who made kfc!
<fats> huh?
<_astrodz_> his chicken is built from source
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Quote: 45009; Rating: 452; [+|-]
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<fireslide> i turned the windows narrator on
<fireslide> it funny as hell :)
<Tolkien`> what does it do?
<fireslide> it narrates stuff man
<Tolkien`> like the text on the screen?
<fireslide> yes
<Tolkien`> is it for deaf people
<Tolkien`> or something?
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Quote: 45013; Rating: 169; [+|-]
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<comet_11> efnet's just like dalnet except no services and we have 'servers' instead of 'occasional connectivity emulators'
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Quote: 45018; Rating: 354; [+|-]
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[Sober|wrk]: Christina Aguilera's Nipple Tweaker Goes on Strike
[pHluid-]: This dude *quit* being Christina Aguilera's nipple tweaker?
[Sober|wrk]: hehehe
: pHluid- is away: Making a resume.
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Quote: 45029; Rating: -84; [+|-]
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<kolby> I'm up at UT and my friend fucked Chris Simms but would never give me his number, she left her phone here...I'm so gonna get laid
<KenKaniff> Who
<KenKaniff> Wait
<kolby> Chris Simms is the QB for U.T. I don't know, he's famous here
<KenKaniff> Are you a girl?
<KenKaniff> Because if you arent
<kolby> and he's also a douche bag
<KenKaniff> You're talking about getting fucked by a guy
<kolby> im a guy
<KenKaniff> And that would make you gay
<kolby> you're talking about little boys
<KenKaniff> I'm Ken Kaniff.
<KenKaniff> Thats what I do
* kolby was kicked by timmo (GAY KICK)
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Quote: 45030; Rating: 363; [+|-]
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* typobox43 looks for life
<Marie> try out of IRC :p
<typobox43> WHAT?!
<typobox43> :P
<Marie> lol
<typobox43> you mean there is such a place?
<Marie> you know, close the IRC screen and sign offline? :)
* typobox43 shudders at the though
<typobox43> *thought
<Marie> lol
<typobox43> my vocal organs are underdeveloped... i don't think i'd get very far
<typobox43> although i think i'd win a thumb war in a heartbeat
<Craig> join #reallife
<Craig> ?
<typobox43> --- Cannot join #reallife (Channel is invite only).
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Quote: 45037; Rating: -7; [+|-]
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<@WSBN-MeBaD> Why doesn't Osama bin Laden have sex with his five wives?
<@WSBN-MeBaD> Because every time he spreads their legs he sees Bush.
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Quote: 45059; Rating: 7; [+|-]
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<wild`> Afghanistan Quick Facts: Life Expectancy 46.62 male, 45.1 female (2000 est.) <<<soon to be revised
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Quote: 45062; Rating: 149; [+|-]
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<beamz> do they sell penis warmers like those 9volt handwarming gloves/
<Nik> yea, they are called "hookers"
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Quote: 45063; Rating: 1381; [+|-]
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<saloo> hey wanna chat;)?
<Nataliehotgurl16> yeah hot guy
<saloo> a/s/l
<saloo> u thr
<Nataliehotgurl16> 16/f/ca
<saloo> 29/m here
<saloo> wanna talk sex;)?
<Nataliehotgurl16> STATUTORY RAPE
<Nataliehotgurl16> STATUTORY RAPE
<Nataliehotgurl16> STATUTORY RAPE
<Nataliehotgurl16> STATUTORY RAPE
<Nataliehotgurl16> STATUTORY RAPE
<Nataliehotgurl16> STATUTORY RAPE
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Quote: 45070; Rating: 419; [+|-]
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<pubatch> my night was much less exciting, I had to explain to my xgirlfriend why I gave her mother the finger last night. it was a big misunderstanding, but i didnt handle it well. "Did you give my mom the finger last night??" 'HAHAH, YES! HAHA'
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Quote: 45077; Rating: 112; [+|-]
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<pubatch> any idea how to find out a phones phone number?
<pubatch> i cant call my regular line, my parents are in bed
* verve thinks
<pubatch> its not written on the machine, or on the phone it goes to either
<verve> i know, just call the operator and ask :P
<pubatch> hah, 'where am i!?'
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Quote: 45079; Rating: 743; [+|-]
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<pubatch> i saw the funniest fucking thing last night
<pubatch> i was driving home and this guy walks out in the crosswalk when im barreling towards it
<pubatch> it turns out to be a blind guy with his big gay white stick, and a yellow jacket with SECURITY written on the back
<pubatch> i donno what the fuck he was guarding but im pretty sure its stolen by now
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Quote: 45089; Rating: -12; [+|-]
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<Tispie> Well..Iam formatting my computer..so i want to save my quake files..but they are way too big for a disk
<Sulyspa> Use a CD?
<Lyssa> Gahhh its Tisp
<Tispie> stfu Lyssa. Iam not in the mood
<Lyssa> haha
<Tispie> Suly, do I not need a burner? I dont know how to put it to a cd lol
*** Quits: Pati` (nukkumahan)
<Thogart> formating always puts people in bad moods..
<Thogart> its like loosing a part of your soul..
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Quote: 45097; Rating: 137; [+|-]
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<@Mi3Z> and im only on 56k
<@Mi3Z> takes about 2 hourse for win2k SP3 on this
<@Mi3Z> hours*
<@Cheez> 2 horses for a service pack?
<@Cheez> doesnt sound like a fair deal to me
<@Mi3Z> yea i know
<@Mi3Z> they rip you off like fuck, you know what MS are like
<@Cheez> still, winXP SP1 checks to see if the horses are stolen :o
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Quote: 45101; Rating: 713; [+|-]
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<Ethrakus> is partitioning your HD that risky?
<Ceiri> partitioning a hard drive is like cutting a pizza into slices
<forvrin> With a baseball bat
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Quote: 45104; Rating: 765; [+|-]
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<The-Pretender> I'm passing judgement on FF8 because I dont like the fucking eye candy. Too many damn graphics
<Golbez> too .. many .. damn .. graphics .. ?"
<Golbez> what the fuck do you want, pong?
<Golbez> "Fight! White Paddle hits Red Paddle for 4 HP!"
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Quote: 45109; Rating: 201; [+|-]
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<_overkill> how do you eat high protein
<EnchWORK> bukkake
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Quote: 45112; Rating: 365; [+|-]
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<`KArmA> and now, an Ode to Redhat 8, in free verse
<`KArmA> I heard that you were cool
<`KArmA> I read the reviews which said you were
<`KArmA> I downloaded your isos and burned you to CD
<`KArmA> The install was beautiful
<`KArmA> You loaded just fine
<`KArmA> But your network configuration sucked and you lied to me about my soundcard
<`KArmA> Then you wouldn't update your software like you said you would
<`KArmA> you lied repeatedly to me about my kerberos 5 libraries
<`KArmA> the sound still won't work despite your assurances
<`KArmA> and I'm left rage hating you, your company, the development community that spawned you and Linus Torvalds himself
<`KArmA> Fuck you Red Hat 8, if you are the example of what Linux Desktops are supposed to bbe
<`KArmA> then I will continue to use OpenBSD
<`KArmA> . . .
<`KArmA> thank you
* JaG cheers
<phr0work> hehe
<phr0work> that was pretty nice karma
<DesScorp> ha ha ha ha
<`KArmA> see? poetry does not suck r0b
<`KArmA> it just has to hit you in the right spot
<phr0work> hehe
<`KArmA> and if anyone posts that to bash.org I'm going to jam my Redhat 8 install CDs up your ass sideways
<DesScorp> you could've just done a Haiku......"Red Hat sucks my cock......OpenBSD rolls over the penguin......As I shave Linus Torvald's Mother's back"
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Quote: 45113; Rating: 426; [+|-]
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<phr0work> redhat really fucked you in the ass
<`KArmA> not yet it hasn't, but its definitely giving me a bit of a rimjob and whispering it suggestively
|
|
Quote: 45115; Rating: -7; [+|-]
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<Rhyos> Anyone wanna hear a bad geology joke?
<Midknight> go on, humor us
<Rhyos> Ok. A bit of background.
<Rhyos> Everyone know what halite is?
<Midknight> if it fails then you will have to be killed a most imaginative and horrible way :)
<Rhyos> It's just a big block of salt.
<Rhyos> *not the joke*
<Rhyos> Anyways, basalt is the stuff that's on the ocean floor.
<Rhyos> So... what do geologists call the stuff on the ocean floor?
<LordJD> fish shit
<Rhyos> Sheep halite. *it was on a test* Fish shit is probably even funnier.
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Quote: 45124; Rating: 179; [+|-]
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<Quik> Quake is the mother of all games!
<fridaY13th> yes... a very old and ugly mother.
|
|
Quote: 45126; Rating: -3; [+|-]
|
<SI-pHluid> so I had to go to the bathroom with a face full of fucking cum and wash that shit off
|
|
Quote: 45130; Rating: 186; [+|-]
|
<BlackComb> any 1 have 04-ja_rule-leaving_(always_on_time_pt_ii_ft_ja_rule)-brm.mp3
<DvsG> ja rule featuring ja rule?
<DvsG> that's twice the gayness
<DvsG> woohoo
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Quote: 45131; Rating: 135; [+|-]
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<DarQ> Just think about it... Who would know better how to please a man ? A man or a woman ?
<Sway> damn right
<Sway> a man
<Sway> a rough and hairy man
<Sultan> Your sick, lol
<DarQ> That's not sick...
<DarQ> That's being realistic.
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Quote: 45132; Rating: 87; [+|-]
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<Vel> 9th graders are in 8th grade or 7th grade
<Vel> err 13 year olds*
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Quote: 45137; Rating: -41; [+|-]
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<Xiautau> my nose is running like a negro out of a convinence store
|
|
Quote: 45138; Rating: 190; [+|-]
|
<Cringer> By an 8-1 vote Monday, the members of the U.S. Supreme Court collectively resolved to lose their virginity by Dec. 31, 2002.
<danhon> Who gave the dissenting opinion?
<Cringer> I bet Scalia.
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Quote: 45139; Rating: 208; [+|-]
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<Phreak407> why the fuck is there purple m&ms in this bag?
<Anti-Social> Because they're tryin to tell you you're gay
<Phreak407> oh
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|
Quote: 45143; Rating: 295; [+|-]
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<_ry0suke_> CRANK DOESN'T KNOW ANYTHING
<VgameT> I'VE BEEN NOTICING THAT RECENTLY
<craNKGod> RYO I KNOW A LOT OF STUFF
<craNKGod> GO AHEAD
<craNKGod> ASK ME
<VgameT> CRANKGOD WHAT'S THE LAST DIGIT OF THE IP REPRESENTATION OF A /28 NETMASK
<VgameT> IN DECIMAL
<nondescript> DASH OFF TO GOOGLE, BEFORE ANYONE GETS SUSPICIOUS THAT YOU DON'T KNOW!
<craNKGod> 0
<VgameT> AS YOU CAN SEE
<VgameT> CRANK ONLY KNOWS TOTALLY USELESS SHIT
<craNKGod> WHAT'S GOOGLE
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