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Quote: 40125; Rating: 256; [+|-]
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<KingV> whats the time difference between utah and arizona right now?
<Fico> 100 years of bad moral judgement
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Quote: 40139; Rating: 79; [+|-]
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<Graey> aw hell yeah. the olsen twins in bikinis
<Sasquatch> Pervert!... url?
<Graey> newsgroups
<Sasquatch> bleh
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Quote: 40143; Rating: 2; [+|-]
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<pricky> is there a way to auto-op users in mirc?
<pricky> score
<pricky> wildcards work!
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Quote: 40155; Rating: 202; [+|-]
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<Gwindor> I like how horses can shit and walk at the same time. what an achievment! must have taken centuries of adaption.
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Quote: 40171; Rating: 1163; [+|-]
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tom: why do girls get grossed out when you say you've tried to suck your own dick?
Kanddak: lol
Kanddak: are you saying you've tried to suck your own dick
tom: today in journalism these girls tied my shoelaces together
tom: so I bend down to untie them
tom: and she pushes my head down
tom: and I'm like "believe me, I've tried about a million times, it's not going to work"
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Quote: 40187; Rating: 426; [+|-]
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<Error_404> i swear to god... the next time my mom approaches me about my drinking, i'm gonna fucking come out of the closet...
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Quote: 40193; Rating: 2285; [+|-]
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<MARSHALL> CAN YOU SPEAK IN BM
<Nikari> wtf is bm?
<MARSHALL> BM MEANS BAHASA MALAYSIA
<Nikari> Does everyone yell in Malasyia?
<MARSHALL> ARE YOU GIRL OR MAN
<Nikari> a very girly man. you?
<MARSHALL> YOU FIRST
<Nikari> ... that would make you a girl, then
<MARSHALL> I AM MAN
<Nikari> HEAR ME ROAR
<MARSHALL> WHAT YOU MENAS
<Nikari> It's an american joke. Do you have jokes in malaysia?
<MARSHALL> YES.IN MALAYSIA HAVE MANY JOKE.
<MARSHALL> ARE YOU WANT CAME TO MALAYSIA
<Nikari> Are you offering hot malaysian sex?
<MARSHALL> WHAT YOU MEANS
<Nikari> Well, when a man and woman love each other very much, he sticks his woo woo into her waa waa. And in very special circumstances, if two men love each other very much, he will stick his woo woo into the other guy's uh oh.
<MARSHALL> I CANOT LOVE NOW.I STILL STUDY
<Nikari> They're always time for love!
<MARSHALL> ARE YOU STILL STUDY?
<Nikari> When I'm not love.
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Quote: 40201; Rating: 216; [+|-]
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<BigSkippy> everybody forgets to turn /away off.
<BigSkippy> I was gone for 3 days once masturbating if you listen to my /back
message
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Quote: 40210; Rating: 274; [+|-]
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<SiFL> wow i was just looking at something and thought to myself, this is kool, i better get a screenshot, then i realized i was just looking at it.... it wasnt on my comp
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Quote: 40218; Rating: 178; [+|-]
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<pix[word]> anyone know how to search for 'c++' on google? + is an operator, and doesn't search for that
<cam[home]> search for "c++"
<pix[word]> i did
<pix[word]> does a search for "c "
<cam[home]> not when I did it
<cam[home]> http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&q=%22c%2B%2B%22
<pix[word]> damn
<pix[word]> i did 'c++'
<pix[word]> not "c++"
<pix[word]> yarrr
<cam[home]> I'm e-mailing your boss telling him you can't even use a search engine, so he needs to hire me
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Quote: 40225; Rating: 206; [+|-]
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Nuclear Veasel: That's on the same island as Pearl Harbor, right?
LiveThLfe: yes, it's all on Kaui (I think that's how you spell it)
LiveThLfe: No wait...
LiveThLfe: Oahu
Nuclear Veasel: That's one hell of a different spelling...
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Quote: 40228; Rating: 536; [+|-]
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<JiggyNiggy> soul u ever been caught wanking behind the shed?
<Soulfly-> no
<JiggyNiggy> Good Spot isnt it :D
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Quote: 40233; Rating: 125; [+|-]
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<Pigs> so our network guy is a cock smoker
<Joes_meat> I so wanna be one of those.
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Quote: 40235; Rating: 141; [+|-]
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<Celestar> I'm just disassembling the notebook, the battery contacts are dirty and need cleaning.
<Celestar> I think I overdid this disassembling. *holds LCD panel in hand*
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Quote: 40247; Rating: 93; [+|-]
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<^Jenn^> hard to find good landlords that work with you
<Glyolis> Your landlord works for McDonalds?
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Quote: 40252; Rating: 475; [+|-]
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<fRaz0r> there was a guy who ran into a bank with a gun and shouted freeze mother stickers this is a fuckup
<JennyRae> did he get any money?
<fRaz0r> all the people in the bank just laughed and he ran off embarrased lol
<JennyRae> darn... he didnt get any money.....
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Quote: 40253; Rating: 99; [+|-]
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<ishmal> im so naiive sometimes, for a while, i thought "Dubya" was some russian guy
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Quote: 40256; Rating: -13; [+|-]
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<Hogan> hah some asswipe went to support to ask how to open iso files
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Quote: 40260; Rating: 211; [+|-]
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<Bloodshedder> HEY YOUR PENIS IS MISSING
<macvilewhore> HEY I FOUND IT
<macvilewhore> ITS IN YOUR ASS
<Bloodshedder> must be small, i don't feel a thing
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Quote: 40268; Rating: 326; [+|-]
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<|YoShi|> FBI just came to my house
<Shorty> when they held up their fbi badge didn't u say somethng heroic
<|YoShi|> yeah i said, hold on let me get dressed
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Quote: 40271; Rating: 384; [+|-]
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<luva_bd> i want a dick in my pussy
<luva_bd> oh and a puppy
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Quote: 40277; Rating: 437; [+|-]
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<torm_> fuckin gay school tommorow
<Avram`> There is school for that?
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Quote: 40293; Rating: 341; [+|-]
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<@CMX> got a speeding ticket the other day
<@CMX> and the fucking asshole cop
<+mootlife> how fast?
<@CMX> insulted my car
<%jdp> wtf... lol
<@CMX> 69 in a 55
<+mootlife> insulted your car?
<@CMX> fucker asked if I had any dead midgets in the trunk implying I have a little car
<+mootlife> LMAO!
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Quote: 40301; Rating: 2; [+|-]
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<spookshow-away> playing: Various Artists - Track 10
<FadeJade> good track
|
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Quote: 40309; Rating: 161; [+|-]
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<@LordZERO> I used to think a girls butt was forbidden. I was so young, and naive...
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Quote: 40312; Rating: 218; [+|-]
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<bbyhewie> my roommate just asked me how to change the font of text in a picture he just downloaded
<PhsyCon> tell him to drop it in notepad :P
<bbyhewie> no, i told him to shut up and stop talking to me
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Quote: 40313; Rating: 199; [+|-]
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<Shut^D0wN> one time i called office depot and asked "What kind of RAM do you guys have?" and the guy said "We dont have RAM just memory..."
<Wario64> So what kind of memory did they have?
<Shut^D0wN> I dunno... I think i had an anyerism
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Quote: 40326; Rating: 151; [+|-]
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<p1astik> i think i should just dry shave, i mean, the razor is just right here and it saves me a trip to the bathroom
<bugster> but you could get a beer at the same time
<p1astik> tempting...very tempting....oh..the decisions i have to make
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Quote: 40345; Rating: 184; [+|-]
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*** Melchior ([email protected]) has joined #allniterz
*** Ass-Mastah sets mode: +a Melchior
<Orlyx> lol
<Melchior> what
<Orlyx> ur hostmsak
<Tripper> Melchior you, my friend, are gay
<Orlyx> what happened?
<Orlyx> *** Melchior ([email protected]) has joined #allniterz
<Orlyx> lol wtf
<Orlyx> whyd u get that as ur vhost
<Melchior> lol wtf!
<Orlyx> lol
<Melchior> i have no idea
<Orlyx> i bet if u quit and come back itll go away
<Melchior> i never saw it
*** Melchior ([email protected]) Quit (Quit: )
<Orlyx> lmfao
<Orlyx> god i love him
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Quote: 40353; Rating: 314; [+|-]
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*** Ashy_Boy has joined #rpgfan
<KeeperX> ashton: http://www.goatse.cx
<Ashy_Boy> ?
* KeeperX waits
<Ashy_Boy> (^#*&#(*^$*&^$#(*&^#(*&^$(*&^#(*&
<KeeperX> BAHAHAHHAHA
<Ashy_Boy> FUCK YOU
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Quote: 40360; Rating: 263; [+|-]
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<MegamanX2K>yeah, the best thing Saddam could do now would be to go to the Un and hold a conference in which he tells then plainly, "The only place you need to send weapons inspectors to is...MY PANTS! Cuz baby I've got a big one stowed away there, ready to launch! Ohhhhh yeah!"
<MegamanX2K>...it's not like he's actually respected to begin with...
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Quote: 40376; Rating: 351; [+|-]
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<souletr> god i hate fucking stupid bitches
<souletr> er
<souletr> *hate stupid fucking bitches
<souletr> i'd fuck stupid bitches
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Quote: 40378; Rating: 536; [+|-]
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<masttime1> i gotta pee
<masttime1> brb
<masttime1> SHIT
<masttime1> IM SO KILLING MY BROTHER
<masttime1> he put saran wrap on the toilet
<masttime1> and i peed all over my foot
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Quote: 40380; Rating: 213; [+|-]
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<Zeuxy> I have to take all the dead small children out of my walls.
<Zeuxy> Cable guy's coming on monday.
<Kayin> Zeuxy: so you're a pedonecrophiliac?
<Zeuxy> Kayin: I never said I fucked them.
<Zeuxy> .. well.. just the chicks
<Zeuxy> But usually while they're alive
<astral> 'usually.'
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Quote: 40388; Rating: 798; [+|-]
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<[CSI]X-Crispy> bagging groceries is like tetris in real life, I realised
|
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Quote: 40392; Rating: 162; [+|-]
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[+Badtz] good sex = the best shit out there
[@orion] what's the bandwidth requirements?
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Quote: 40393; Rating: -10; [+|-]
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<oneshadow> hi there, im looking for a guy under 25 to severely and permanently damage my penis, im from ny and will travel, also offering $500 maybe more, lets talk private!!!
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Quote: 40416; Rating: 423; [+|-]
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<phr0work> using linux is like using windows, except every time you try to do something like install a program or a driver or set a different resolution, a big black dude runs in and kicks you in the side of the head
|
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Quote: 40419; Rating: 391; [+|-]
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<bell-chan> i got the little mermaid on dvd
<bell-chan> dude, if you pause it just right when she just gets her legs
<bell-chan> BOOM
<bell-chan> you see nothing
<bell-chan> the only sad thing about that is i tried
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Quote: 40426; Rating: 32; [+|-]
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<Claud> when you've got enough people pressed up against you so you're reaming someone in the ass, someone's reaming you in the ass and the 3 people on your sides are fondling your testicles, people sweat regardless
|
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Quote: 40430; Rating: 146; [+|-]
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(matthardy) mxlbody: i have been in trouble for irc'ing @ work
(matthardy) mxlbody: like my fat boss came in and there was someone on IRC
(matthardy) going "YOUR FAT BOSS"
(matthardy) and she saw it
(matthardy) she didn't let on , but i saw she was hurt
(matthardy) and i was laughing inside but scared
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Quote: 40437; Rating: 11; [+|-]
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* beady husg plastering
<DC_Sniper> husg?
<Guilty> I wish I was plastered
<beady> its like hugs, but hornier
<kalypso> in the leg humping sorta way?.
<beady> kalypso, yes
<beady> i hold the leg
<beady> and hump like a bitch :)
<kalypso> tmi! tmi!
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Quote: 40441; Rating: 211; [+|-]
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<@CC-Myshra> (Your Mom) + (Your Dad) + (Your Dog) = You
<@p24t> haha
<+[PQ3]UlTiMaTeP> wierd...
<+[PQ3]UlTiMaTeP> no wonder i like to drink out of the toilet
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Quote: 40443; Rating: 94; [+|-]
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<mdl> i think nec uses aperture grille tubes
<mdl> and mitsu
<mdl> yeah
<AlmtyBob> there ar ea few I believe
<RevMarcus> afaik nec and mitsumi both do invar shadow mask
<AlmtyBob> if I wasn't masturbating I'd look on the back of my monitor and tell you
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Quote: 40456; Rating: 309; [+|-]
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<PuffinFreshWog> Lord_Lamb: a cop came to our school and said that if two underage ppls fuck, they are, strictly by law, raping eachother
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Quote: 40460; Rating: 269; [+|-]
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* SexySam has joined #avision
<Jasper> SexySam: Leave now, while you still can :|
<SexySam> what's up?
<CY666> We talking about first time mastrubation experiences.
<SexySam> thx
* SexySam has left #avision
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Quote: 40461; Rating: 131; [+|-]
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<CY666> Yeah, I sticked multiple things in my ass in my life.
<CY666> I even went to look for a virbrator in my GF's stuff once, since I was somehow convinced that she had one. :|
<BUBA_kiNG> fuck.. i never gotto try out a vibrator
<CY666> Me neither, because she didn't posses one.
<CY666> I dried a force-feedback psx controller though.
<CY666> Kind of hard to do...
<CY666> You had to summon those Guardian Forces in FFVIII without the view on your controller, holding one side of the thing firmly, and laying in a weird position on your chair.
<CY666> Didn't give me much satisfaction.
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Quote: 40463; Rating: 745; [+|-]
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<Bulbareon> Avalanche prevention goggles.
<Bulbareon> Battery powered battery charger.
<Bulbareon> Braille Drivers' Manual
<FlareonAtma> helicoptor ejection seat
<FlareonAtma> submarine screen window
<FlareonAtma> iMac
<Bulbareon> lol
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Quote: 40466; Rating: 72; [+|-]
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<DrNick668> man, a volvo hit me yesterday
<DrNick668> the volvo hit me and it's gunna cost me like 200 bucks or some shit coz it was my fault
<Warkha> was it an old person in the volvo?
<DrNick668> nah, fat chick
<DrNick668> i turned across the traffic and couldn't see her comin
<Prozzy> at least the fat chick didn't hit on you, you woulda had to pay another $200 to make her go away
<Warkha> or throw food
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Quote: 40470; Rating: 450; [+|-]
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<billa> rock climbing == need a partner
<billa> maybe ill just join #gym
<billa> err
<billa> join the gym
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