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Quote: 40471; Rating: 266; [+|-]
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* Mike grabs a pitcher of ice cold water
* Mike then pours the ice cold water over narzy
<Mitch_Shrader> i did that to a skunk once. it was educational.
<Mike> LOL!!!!
<Mitch_Shrader> the skunk didn't like it much either.
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Quote: 40473; Rating: 465; [+|-]
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<Enrico> do you like your co-workers
<Thibster> I'd like them to leave me alone
<Enrico> have you tried shooting them... I bet you didn't.
<Thibster> no I tried
<Thibster> they respawn
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Quote: 40474; Rating: -73; [+|-]
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<Grimspoon> would you amputate an innocent babie's arm, skin it and use the baby arm skin as a condom in order to save 60 million lives?
<Destrox> you'd get to fuck somone with baby skin to become a hero for earth
<Grimspoon> i'd prolly not skin it, just jab the whole arm on my shlong and the little baby fingers would be like "ribbed for her pleasure"
<Grimspoon> i'd use the baby arm to ass fuck jessepence
<jessepence> ooooh yeah
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Quote: 40475; Rating: 1173; [+|-]
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<wirm> going to bed in 15 mins
<wirm> 10
<wirm> 12
<wirm> 14
<wirm> fucking download remain steady
<wirm> 13
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Quote: 40476; Rating: -14; [+|-]
|
<|-|p|> neko-kun
<|-|p|> amrit is a h8er
<|-|p|> and what do we do to h8erz in this chan?
<amrit> deop em?
* amrit sets mode: -o |-|p|
* karr sets mode: -o+o amrit |-|p|
<amrit> like that?
<|-|p|> no, we usually don't do anything to haters
<amrit> ooh, heh
* |-|p| sets mode: +o amrit
* karr sets mode: -o amrit
<|-|p|> haha
<amrit> ...
<|-|p|> j00 got revenged ;p
<amrit> faggot ass bot
<amrit> I AM THE FUCKING 0WNER
<|-|p|> that's what j00 get for hating, dawg
<|-|p|> got to be a lover, not a hater
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Quote: 40477; Rating: 5; [+|-]
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<chris> aaaaah this class never ends
<chris> i'm bringing headphones next class
<chris> and a zip dick full of oggs
<chris> er...
<chris> zip disk
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Quote: 40479; Rating: 247; [+|-]
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<Tajar> Just a heads up... I may be gone for a few days
<Tajar> Hurricane Lili is heading our way
<Tajar> and they evacuated the town next to us
<Guildenstern> Back up your harddrive just in case
<Tajar> Guildy, I'm unplugging it. And I have zip disks of the important stuff
<Guildenstern> bout 900
<Kiir> you know you are a computer geek when you have a hurricane headng your way and the first thing you do is backup your harddrive
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Quote: 40480; Rating: 581; [+|-]
|
* DarkScream watched some kid get hit by a car.
(DarkScream) On his bike too.
(DarkScream) The front end of the bike exploded, i almost got hit by the shrapenal
(DarkScream) I woulda helped.. but.
(DarkScream) I was laughing too hard and stuff.
(Sklathill) o_o;;
(DarkScream) I hurt my neck rolling on the ground.
(Vulpes) I feel less bad about laughing when I read about it, now.
(DarkScream) Laughing, of course.
(Riffraff) ...is the kid okay?
(DarkScream) Of course not.
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Quote: 40482; Rating: 228; [+|-]
|
<j03bl0w> I did a /ignroe *@* CHAN in one window earlier today and only just realised, it worked in every window, and i've had EVERY channel I've been in on ignore today ..
<j03bl0w> No fucking wonder I was bored
<j03bl0w> I just thought "strange, no ones talking today"
<j03bl0w> fucking hell.
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|
Quote: 40483; Rating: 239; [+|-]
|
<daimonic> i was standing in the kitchen waiting for my toast for about 2 minutes
<daimonic> stoned out of my head so i just stood there looking at the toaster
<daimonic> then when it finally was done it gave me some fright
<daimonic> fuck
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Quote: 40484; Rating: 134; [+|-]
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<Dude68> I just spent the last 15 minutes talking to an AI bot
<Homie22m> i think it was like 50 minutes
<Dude68> shhh.. I'm gonna pretend that it was only 15... so I don't sound lame...
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|
Quote: 40485; Rating: -11; [+|-]
|
<Tr1v14s3rv314m> 28. tegucigalpa is the capital of ______ ?
<Rive> wtfux
<Dr3w529> fuck that.
<Rive> Later
|
|
Quote: 40486; Rating: 177; [+|-]
|
<Soulfly-> come on simo we all know what u do on those long brisbane to sunshine coast train trips..
<Soulfly-> YOU THINK ABOUT SEX POSITIONS DONT U?
<simo> no
<simo> i wank
<Croew> oh god
* Croew has quit IRC
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|
Quote: 40487; Rating: -121; [+|-]
|
(CountZero) does anyone know where i can find the irc channel for bash.org?! plz help thank you
(Sunk) Hrmm..
(Sunk) I don't.
(turb0) no
(Val[AWAY]) Hrm. Can't recall.
(D3KK0N) #bearcave
(Badtz_brx) what is bash.org?
(Val[AWAY]) #microsoft, maybe?
*** Kick: CountZero was kicked by Amanda_ (Amanda_)
(Sunk) ROFL
(turb0) HAhahahahaha
(Xanor) lol
(turb0) that was classic
(madog) omg
(Val[AWAY]) :)
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|
Quote: 40488; Rating: 148; [+|-]
|
<CofeeVint> how do i d/l ?
<Konno_Asami> type "/quit i love you" without quotes
y2kenjination has Quit iRC (i love you)
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|
Quote: 40489; Rating: 183; [+|-]
|
<trife> past 2 days i been in the best mood dunno why
<far_away-> cuz u wante sex0rs
<trife> well i was about to get laid yesterday but my stepdad just fuckin got home
<trife> :(
<trife> as soon as i unbutton her pants my stepdad pulls in driveway
<far_away-> fuck him
<HSOK> yeah man
<HSOK> just go at her!
<HSOK> shoulda gone downstairs, gave him a twenty and said "go see a movie, i need a little time with the lady"
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|
Quote: 40490; Rating: 1197; [+|-]
|
<AMD_aTHLON_MP> mnajdi@microsoft.aint.nothing.but.a.system-crash.net
<C0ZMIC|WoRk> yeh
<C0ZMIC|WoRk> i work for microsoft
<AMD_aTHLON_MP> oh ok
<AMD_aTHLON_MP> to u know l cracked the windows xp home
<C0ZMIC|WoRk> heh so what
<C0ZMIC|WoRk> many people crack our software
<AMD_aTHLON_MP> do u know the trick
<C0ZMIC|WoRk> once you try and install service pack 1 your ip will be logged and traced
<AMD_aTHLON_MP> l work for the tnt2 cracker team
<AMD_aTHLON_MP> we cracked over 40 milon softwares
<AMD_aTHLON_MP> look man
<AMD_aTHLON_MP> we got a ip logging that gives u fake traces
<C0ZMIC|WoRk> microsoft already makes millions from coporate buyers
<AMD_aTHLON_MP> that how we cracked win xp home
<C0ZMIC|WoRk> i already got your IP from IRC
<C0ZMIC|WoRk> @acc6-ppp29.hay.dialup.connect.net.au
<AMD_aTHLON_MP> ok
<AMD_aTHLON_MP> l, joking
<C0ZMIC|WoRk> i can call your ISP and ask them who you are
<AMD_aTHLON_MP> l not evevn useing win xp home
<AMD_aTHLON_MP> l,m sorry
<AMD_aTHLON_MP> l was only jking
<AMD_aTHLON_MP> plz forgive me
<AMD_aTHLON_MP> l got a licesed copy of win98
<AMD_aTHLON_MP> plz forgive me
|
|
Quote: 40491; Rating: 130; [+|-]
|
<DevDuck> how can we you worry about a little speed difference when there's such huge problems in the world? like hunger and war and my mozilla crashing!?
|
|
Quote: 40492; Rating: 279; [+|-]
|
<datacide> i just wanted to type shutdown -r now
<datacide> and what i typed was stfu -r now
<datacide> and for a moment...it looked as though the damn machine was gonna do soemthing
<datacide> like a....stfu hidden binary
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|
Quote: 40493; Rating: 101; [+|-]
|
<Shafty> but you can't expect linux to hold your dick for you while you pee like windows does...
<Snapcase> I don't want it to hold my dick, but it would be nice if the toilet wasn't an unmarked cinderblock.
<Thraq> and you have to shake it yourself too....
<Thraq> just grab that root and shake it good
<Thraq> and say "Take that Microsoft"!!!!!
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|
Quote: 40494; Rating: 340; [+|-]
|
<Hawk> I'm gonna be tied up shortly...my brother and girlfriend are stopping by
<Roman> ...
<Monk> so which one's tying you up? your bro or your gf?
|
|
Quote: 40496; Rating: 362; [+|-]
|
<Posno> ne 1 h3r3
<Monk> is there a minimum level of l33tness needed to respond to that?
|
|
Quote: 40497; Rating: 209; [+|-]
|
<TK-Work> Don't know if I should get 1 1,000 watt fog machine or 2 700 watt fag machines.
<Ouroboros> Whoa.
<Ouroboros> fag machines?
<Ouroboros> What do those do?
<TK-Work> bend over the trick or treaters as they come to the door
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|
Quote: 40498; Rating: 494; [+|-]
|
<cygnus> in windows
<cygnus> what it mean
<cygnus> if the folder has a hand underneaath it
<Sephiroth> means it is shared
<Sephiroth> across your network
<cygnus> how did you know that
<cygnus> i thought it meant it was heavy or something
<cygnus> like
<cygnus> it's got 10 gigs in it
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|
Quote: 40499; Rating: 161; [+|-]
|
<RunNHide> women should be computers - then you could re-configure their mouths to be input-only devices
|
|
Quote: 40501; Rating: 118; [+|-]
|
<Guilty> In my politics class, my teacher said the reason crime is dropping today is because the abortions started in 1973 of single mothers of ethnic backgrounds
<Guilty> Hence all the kids who were never born, arent here today to be criminals
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|
Quote: 40502; Rating: 225; [+|-]
|
<Perryman> my vacuum blows
<DooMStalK> Perryman: You know, a lot of people have ended up in the hospital with embarrassing injuries because they thought their vacuum "blows"
|
|
Quote: 40503; Rating: 681; [+|-]
|
<stat_`> we thought about catching a duck and cocking it :P
<Spartak> cocking
<Spartak> you sick fucks
<stat_`> cooking
<stat_`> COOKING I SAY
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|
Quote: 40504; Rating: 466; [+|-]
|
<DamianMor> On the Top 50-100 page, is it possible to scroll down further? say top 200 etc
<datacide> no
<DamianMor> Thought not
<maff> top one jillion
<datacide> take random :-)
<DamianMor> Random ones are not as high scored ;)
<McMoo> maybe you should stop letting other people decide what's funny
<McMoo> you son of a bitch
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Quote: 40507; Rating: 224; [+|-]
|
* Siren changes topic to 'Is it considered oral sex if my pc goes down on me???'
|
|
Quote: 40508; Rating: 1896; [+|-]
|
* rabid_si is going AFK.
* rabid_si is now known as rabid_si[AFK]
<DopeHat> Rabid is going to anally fist Kao.
<rabid_si[AFK]> Rabid_Si isn't here right now DopeHat.
* because_he_is_busy_wanking has joined #infinity
<because_he_is_busy_wanking> Rabid
<rabid_si[AFK]> Rabid_Si isn't here right now because_he_is_busy_wanking.
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|
Quote: 40510; Rating: 581; [+|-]
|
<dilema> acronyms make this world a better place
<AswethinkweServ> lets have an acronym contest
<Lisa[NY]> stfu
|
|
Quote: 40511; Rating: 155; [+|-]
|
<rigel> maybe a few centuries from now, year 2k would be remembered solely for the goatse.cx homepage.
<rigel> "the dark rectum dilation century"
<avoozl> rofl
<avoozl> it'll probably be the only thing that survives the nuclear winter
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|
Quote: 40512; Rating: 57; [+|-]
|
<Catalyst> iMike: have you ever heard of a virus that corrupts the shit out of the registry...
<Catalyst> and really buggers with the kernel
<Catalyst> and rundll
<Catalyst> actually, everything.
<iMike> yeah ive heard of that virus
<iMike> commonly called 'windows'
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|
Quote: 40513; Rating: 289; [+|-]
|
*** Maquiavelo changes the topic to 'If you don't want to have kids, have sex with your sister in law and you'll have nephews'
|
|
Quote: 40515; Rating: 665; [+|-]
|
[BrntToast] #amish can't join channel (you're banned!) <------- they banned me when i asked for the secret as to how a computer runs without electricity :(
|
|
Quote: 40516; Rating: 224; [+|-]
|
<SK> Gift certificate ^_^
<TehEnemy> heh, yeah.. did that to my sis SK LOL
<TehEnemy> handed her a Target gift card.. said "Have fun"
<SK> Was it like, a $10 one? lol
<TehEnemy> She asked "how much" I said, You'll find out when you check out now won't ya
<TehEnemy> I think that short circuited her
<TehEnemy> Cashier: That'll be 149.99, Sis: Here's my card, Cashier: That'll be 159.99
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|
Quote: 40517; Rating: 160; [+|-]
|
<PureCaneSugar> was watching docmentry on TLC late nite.
<PureCaneSugar> roman soldiers did that.
<dan> what??
<PureCaneSugar> took piece of sheepgut. Tied a knot on one end...
<dan> o ya...
<dan> i remember sheepskin condoms
<dan> it's like fuking a sheep up the ass and a chick at the same time
|
|
Quote: 40518; Rating: 303; [+|-]
|
<Tamahome> Ryan: "here" being?
<mdew> .nz of course
<Tamahome> oh, Europe doesn't count :P
<mdew> europe?
<Tamahome> Europe is traditionally a *very slow* gaming market
<mdew> since when was .nz europe?
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|
Quote: 40519; Rating: 138; [+|-]
|
<@ant> With something that my hand spends more time on than my dick, I see no reason not to splurge on a mouse.
<@Scribble> Yeah, but I'd question whether my hand spends more time on my dick or not.
<@shrav> for me its a matter of which hand
<@shrav> i usually have one on each
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Quote: 40520; Rating: 559; [+|-]
|
<Nate> i have a big problem suddenly
<Nate> i just went to scratch myself
<Nate> had superglue on my hand and didn't realize it
<Nate> my left hand is now superglued somewhere very bad
<Weirdo_God_of_Insanity> Remember, twisting motions will overstress the glue, hopefully before it overstresses you.
Weirdo_God_of_Insanity is suddenly GLAD he cannot see Nate right now.
<Nate> .......
<Nate> oh god
<Nate> that hurt..
<Nate> cccc
<Nate> cccc
<Nate> dammit
<Nate> my fingers now glued to the c key
<Weirdo_God_of_Insanity> Well, that's gotta be an improvement, really.
|
|
Quote: 40521; Rating: 1138; [+|-]
|
TAAK24: you gamecube like yes?
gamecube4789: may i ask who you are?
TAAK24: i use aim
TAAK24: i find name in directory
TAAK24: you know where i get cheap gamecube?
gamecube4789: how much money do you have?
TAAK24: no much
gamecube4789: at least 100 right?
TAAK24: no :(
TAAK24: i need save for 3 months for 100 us dollar
TAAK24: i work at factory during week
TAAK24: money not good
gamecube4789: you talk like a baby
gamecube4789: lol
TAAK24: my english no good
TAAK24: why you make fun
TAAK24: i take this insult
TAAK24: i get factory friend slit throat
TAAK24: you no fuck with I!!!
TAAK24: YOU AMERICAN COCK
TAAK24: I KILL YOU FUCK
TAAK24: i ask friendly you make fun
TAAK24: YOU FUCK
TAAK24: DIE
gamecube4789: what? i don't understand what you are saying
|
|
Quote: 40522; Rating: 428; [+|-]
|
<ratsun> damnit i started a smallbox game but nobody came on the field so i exited and now i cant get in
<ratsun> what to do?
<super-radish> reboot
<ratsun> the computer?
<super-radish> no, i mean take your shoes off and put them back on
<ratsun> i'm not wearing shoes.....
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|
Quote: 40524; Rating: 318; [+|-]
|
*** Mode change "+b *!*@24CBE824.816AE85.502C52D6.IP" for channel #s*p by Spazz
<Spazz> Typo.
<amishjosh> typo? YOU BANNED HIM!
<Spazz> b and v, they're right next to each other
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Quote: 40525; Rating: 319; [+|-]
|
<@kikazz> anyone want a copy of Windows 3.1 in Russian?
<@Nfs> may i ask why you have it?
<@kikazz> because its 8 megs, and it looked better than the polish version
<@kikazz> my options were arabic, catalan, czech, danish, finnish, greek, hebrew, hungarian, japanese, korean, norweigan, persian, polish, russian, simplified chinese, traditional chinese
<@kikazz> .. no english in there :P
<@Nfs> hebrew!
<@kikazz> "shalom, new user"
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|
Quote: 40526; Rating: 83; [+|-]
|
krux [~krux@nixhelp-62585.somewhere.dsl-verizon.net] has joined #linux
<krux> yello
<krux> dsl is back buah :)
SignOff krux: #linux (Ping timeout)
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|
Quote: 40527; Rating: 373; [+|-]
|
-> -#tfc- [notice:#tfc] YOU HAVE RECEIVED A FATAL ERROR, PRESS ALT + F4 TO REPAIR THIS IMMEDIATELY
<Spearhead> should i try it? :-P
<Spearhead> oh here we go
<Cobrabat> go on tell me what happens
<Spearhead> nothin
<Spearhead> :-P
<VooDoo> press alt and F4 at the same time
<Spearhead> nothing happens voods :-P
<Spearhead> does it have to be a capital f?
<Spearhead> hmmm xp that dont work voods :-P
<VooDoo> F4 as in the buttons above the numbers
<Spearhead> ooooh like the F1 Help button?
<Cobrabat> do you hit F and 4 together?
<Spearhead> i tried that cob it didnt work
<Spearhead> unless you have to hold shift as well to make it a capital F
<VooDoo> like the F1 help button
<VooDoo> n00bz...
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|
Quote: 40528; Rating: 1637; [+|-]
|
<thcip> Answering Machine: Did you ever hear one of those corny, positive messages on someone's answering machine? "Hi, It's a great day and I'm out enjoying it right now. I hope you are too. The thought for the day is 'Share the love.'" Beep." "Uh, yeah...this is the VD clinic calling...Speaking of being positive,
your test is back. Stop sharing the love"
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|
Quote: 40529; Rating: 126; [+|-]
|
(Mase): who we playing italinas?
(DynamoDan): macedonian
(Mase): where r they from?
(DynamoDan): the macedonians are from macedonia
|
|
Quote: 40530; Rating: 154; [+|-]
|
<Cid{FYD}> B R to the B
<Navix{mp3}> Death to Cid for saying: <Cid{FYD}> B R to the B
* Cid{FYD} has quit IRC (Read error: Connection reset by peer)
<Lance> that was easy :P
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|