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Quote: 41652; Rating: 341; [+|-]
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<skwerrel> sigh...sometimes i really wish i could just ignore my brain and become a christian
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Quote: 41657; Rating: 47; [+|-]
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<Meowfaceman> I Gave NAMBLA Pictures of Your Kid.
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Quote: 41658; Rating: 194; [+|-]
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<daed> believe it or not, the robot on the cover of the queen album is real and he hates you.
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Quote: 41668; Rating: 46; [+|-]
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<Veers> I guess they don't teach bathroom manners in Africa
<Donitz> Veers, newsflash, they don't have bathrooms in Africa.
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Quote: 41678; Rating: -10; [+|-]
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<@dev> I just shit out a "family" of logs.
<@dev> There were two huge ones.. 2 smaller ones. and a tiny one.
<@dev> And then I killed them when I flushed!
<@r3v|ShenL0ng-P-> lol
<@r3v|ShenL0ng-P-> was the tiny one the dog
<@dev> It might have been a baby.
<@r3v|DeathZero> did you poke it.. maybe it was a fetus
<@dev> I left it alone.
<@dev> :o
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Quote: 41699; Rating: 483; [+|-]
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<Tofusensei> linksys routers can suck a cock, btw
<Justin> wow, they really should advertize that feature more. It would increase sales.
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Quote: 41701; Rating: 128; [+|-]
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<Hellspawn> Does anyone know a place where i can download Raymond E. Feists books because a) i have other things to spend cash on. b) Have run out of said cash and c) Kazaa doesnt have any
<Kura> eww, you would actually read that much off a screen?! o_O
<Hellspawn> there's a great new invention - schools printers
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Quote: 41703; Rating: 264; [+|-]
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<AnimeFreak> omg i just bought more ram today
<egg> how many sheep do you have now?
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Quote: 41707; Rating: 565; [+|-]
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Flaritter: "hit it" is an american term
DrSpaZZo: Yes
Flaritter: for examples: "I'd like to hit that"
DrSpaZZo: Brits must have their own thing
Flaritter: AND SO FORTH
DrSpaZZo: Like
Flaritter: ?
DrSpaZZo: 'I'd dip my crumpet in her tea'
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Quote: 41713; Rating: 125; [+|-]
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<Mr_Rabies> Spyware is Jewish
<'Wraith> I take offense to that
<Mr_Rabies> well spyware doesnt eat beef
<SKnight> technically, spyware doesnt believe in Jesus either :
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Quote: 41722; Rating: 269; [+|-]
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* }Phoenix{ has joined #haxxors
<}Phoenix{> Hey, everybody type in /beep 31337 if you wanna be super-leet
<@Tyreal> Dont do it
<jackle> /beep 31337
<redwing> /beep 31337
<GangstaUO> /beep 31337
<jackle> gah!!!
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Quote: 41724; Rating: -26; [+|-]
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<spiteful> the one day rule is when i get to "chill" with you because it only takes a day for you to get a new guy...
<S4L3M> you're such a lamer
<S4L3M> could you tell your brother i can't come on wednesday?
<spiteful> i could... *couch*onedayrule*cough*
<S4L3M> or i could just call him instead and tell him myself and ignore that last little attempt at blackmail
* S4L3M smacks you in the back of the head
<S4L3M> *THUNK* idiot
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Quote: 41726; Rating: 202; [+|-]
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<fuzzwad> theres like that one kid in every state that goes to best buy JUST to destroy the controller
<fuzzwad> you know the one that smells funny and follows you around
<fuzzwad> STARING at you...
<fuzzwad> I WANT TO SQUEEZE A LEMON IN THAT KID'S EYE
<Lazz> wow
<Lazz> how can you fit a lemon in an eye?
<fuzzwad> ILL FIND OUT!!!
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Quote: 41736; Rating: 104; [+|-]
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<Lisa_W> ah, vevery woman's fantasy, 1,000,000s of mindless drones doing what she says....and they call her queen
<Lisa_W> but we'll only want the one that acts like a jerk lol
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Quote: 41741; Rating: 658; [+|-]
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<Rodney> damn mom still on ebay
<territory> lol
<territory> ur selling ur mom?
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Quote: 41743; Rating: 168; [+|-]
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<+aisha-fan> dude
<+aisha-fan> my moms boss brougt in a "new" penteium I
<+aisha-fan> those things r so old their obsoleet
<@MewMew[WC3]> As is correct spelling, I presume.
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Quote: 41752; Rating: 150; [+|-]
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<Endura> Man, don't you just hate it when you are with your parents in front of important people and all of the sudden...you're hard and it won't go down?
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Quote: 41754; Rating: 436; [+|-]
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<Nark> anyone ever put a hole in your bed matress then, grease it up alot, then stick your joint inside and begine to thust? And then your shit got tangled in a spring and all of a sudden you realize that this was a REALLY fucking bad idea?
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Quote: 41756; Rating: 120; [+|-]
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<citrus-> hehe, some guy called me a few weeks ago, asking if I would like more TV channels to watch. (Obviously selling some cable stuff) so I said 'Yes I would' and hung up
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Quote: 41757; Rating: 22; [+|-]
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<Arno> damn 23 meg avi
<Arno> and it's not even pr0n
<ANSi5> then why waste your time? :P
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Quote: 41771; Rating: 546; [+|-]
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<naga> 'dixy normus' won for class princess this year at our school
<naga> at the assembly, they called her name, but she didn't come down to take the prize
<naga> took 'em 5 minutes to figure it out
<parnbl00d> sounds sexual.
<parnbl00d> was she absent or somethin?
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Quote: 41779; Rating: -4; [+|-]
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<[mN]Cracker> cept my smelly grandparents are in the kitchen
<[mN]Cracker> AND THEY SMELL SO BAD
<[mN]Cracker> THEY SMELL LIKE THEY SHOULD BE DEAD ALREADY
<[mN]Cracker> gawd
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Quote: 41781; Rating: 222; [+|-]
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<NoAzRk> So everyday I make my pb&j when I get home. One night I wake up for a snack and go to the kitchen. Moms smeared peanut butter and has the dog lapping.
<Argmyeye> sick! what did you do?
<NoAzRk> I made a fucking pb&j when she was done. I was hungry.
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Quote: 41784; Rating: -46; [+|-]
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<Y2Jesus> [Clone Scanning: #pokebattle]
<Y2Jesus> 6 Match(es) Found
<Y2Jesus> LavosPhoenix: *!*@*.ipt.aol.com
<Y2Jesus> red13n: *!*@*.ipt.aol.com
<Y2Jesus> MrTest: *!*@*.ipt.aol.com
<Y2Jesus> Platinum: *!*@*.ipt.aol.com
<Y2Jesus> SirChris: *!*@*.ipt.aol.com
<Y2Jesus> Xantrix: *!*@*.ipt.aol.com
<Y2Jesus> [End of Clone Scan for: #pokebattle]
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Quote: 41787; Rating: 328; [+|-]
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*** Joins: Pan`Da` ([email protected])
<Pan`Da`> clamp the area between my asshole and testicles with my fingers, the 'taint' as its often called, then i jerk off.. when im about to ejaculate, i can delay it for like 10 secs, then it flies across the room.
<JoanDeArc> Pan`Da`: was that a wrong window?
<Pan`Da`> WTF??
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Quote: 41789; Rating: 328; [+|-]
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* Fireball kicks his computer.. why won't you mount the ipod?
<nica> maybe it's not interested?
<William> :^D
<nica> maybe a bit of wine and some candle light? ;)
<Puppeteer> Fire- Uhm... it's not a Mac?
<nica> KillJoy says, "maybe it's having troubles... viagra?"
<William> Show it porn of Yum, the iMac girl?
<nica> =D
* Fireball grumbles... perverts
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Quote: 41797; Rating: 144; [+|-]
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<danicgross> hacking is very complex
<@Frakes> really?
<danicgross> do u hack
<@Frakes> goodness me no .....what tools would one need?
<danicgross> well
<danicgross> a computer
<danicgross> internet
<@Frakes> ah yes ......got both of those
<danicgross> and skill
<@Frakes> hmmm sadly lacking in the latter
<TheLurker> danicgross: you didn't haxor me did you
<danicgross> are u tempting me
<TheLurker> no
<danicgross> you tempting me arrentyou
<TheLurker> ok, tell you what, tell you what
<TheLurker> i have 2 hard drives, c and d
<TheLurker> on drive d tell me how many folders there are in the root
<danicgross> just a sec
* TheLurker drums his fingers
* @Frakes accompanies with the triangle
<TheLurker> look, just give up
<TheLurker> you obviously suck at this
<TheLurker> have you, in fact, ever hacked anything apart from your own penis?
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Quote: 41801; Rating: 254; [+|-]
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<zerg> if you ever got pregnant would you get an abortion?
<S4L3M> no
<zerg> adoption?
<S4L3M> no
<zerg> keep it?
<S4L3M> of course!! i prefer to know my spawns so i can bestow upon them all my evilness and evil ways and evil knowledge...
<S4L3M> how else will i ever rule the world? fool.
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Quote: 41803; Rating: 307; [+|-]
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<Fozie> XIRWW.
<Fozie> XJEE.
* harm reports foz to dept of anti american activities
* Fozie reports harm to the zoo, ourangutang enclosure
<harm> i got owned yet again :(
<harm> ok this is it its razorblade time for me
* harm has quit IRC
* harm has joined #Proghouse
<harm> wtf goddamn mach3 protective bars
<Fozie> haha you suck at the suicide
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Quote: 41814; Rating: 7; [+|-]
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<WillaCuz> i dont wanna ride solo though
<pagan> ya batman aint shit w/o robin :(
<pagan> just another nigga in an expensive car
<WillaCuz> yup
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Quote: 41820; Rating: -1; [+|-]
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<jonathans> i want to raise goats.
<@Neutral-> <3 goats and their tendency to push backwards when on the edge of a cliff
<synth3tic> So I guess you know why you put a goat on the endge of a cliff when you fuck it
<synth3tic> ....so he pushes back
<jonathans> 'he'
<synth3tic> yes.. 'he'
<@Neutral-> Position cock strategically
<@Neutral-> And wait for the push.
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Quote: 41821; Rating: 266; [+|-]
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<spritegoddess> I had some kid call me up at work today
<spritegoddess> (I work at TRU)
<spritegoddess> asking me for help in Vice City
<spritegoddess> and he sounded like he was maybe...10
<spritegoddess> I don't know why he was calling the place where he bought the game for in-game help
<Mank> Probably because his mom told him to, sprite.
<spritegoddess> "It's ok sweetie, ask the nice toys 'r us lady about the prostitutes"
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Quote: 41822; Rating: 138; [+|-]
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<gate> you're working on a degree in politics, dont call other people retarded =P
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Quote: 41823; Rating: -84; [+|-]
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* CHANFIX ([email protected]) has joined #asker-crew
* services.int sets mode: +o CHANFIX
* CHANFIX was kicked by A-Info (net: #asker-crew is closed)
* A-Info sets mode: +b *!*@services.int
* A-Virus ([email protected]) has left #asker-crew
* A-Virus ([email protected]) has joined #asker-crew
* CHANFIX ([email protected]) has joined #asker-crew
* services.int sets mode: +o CHANFIX
* CHANFIX sets mode: +o A-Virus
* CHANFIX ([email protected]) has left #asker-crew
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Quote: 41824; Rating: 314; [+|-]
|
<tigga> (_|_) (|_) (_|_) (_|) (_|_)
<tigga> thats u shakin ur (_|_)
<S4L3M> and this is you when i do it: 8=M==D 8===MD 8=M==D 8===MD
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Quote: 41825; Rating: 1873; [+|-]
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<mh_> str8 up mf i was afkin 4 a sec & that mutha goes all stfu on me
<mh_> wtf? 4 nothin at all
* harm consults Oxford's Non-Abridged Gangsta Abbreviations Explicator
<mh_> gtof
* harm consults harder
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Quote: 41845; Rating: 231; [+|-]
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<dyno> Anyone ever gotten the error "Network Cable Unplugged" ?
<kash[]> yea it means your network cable is unpluged
<dyno> at first I thought it was because of an IRQ setting, but we fixed that.. and I am still getting that error.
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Quote: 41851; Rating: 674; [+|-]
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*** joet ([email protected]) has joined #javascript
<joet> hey
<Object> hey joe
<yossarian> where you going with that gun of yours?
<yossarian> hey joe, i heard you shot your woman down
<[Roosta]> shot her down to the ground?
<joet> umm huh?
<impatient> hey joe, where you gonna run to now?
<joet> I think you have me mistakened with somone else
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Quote: 41855; Rating: 305; [+|-]
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* +abinnie has an english essay to do before his teacher realises the floppy disc he gave her has holes punched in the media
<@quip> :D
<+abinnie> and is actually a dos boot disc
<@FrozenFood> lol
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Quote: 41858; Rating: 790; [+|-]
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<Sober|wrk> heh
<Sober|wrk> lol
<Sober|wrk> my co-worker is throwing a ball
<Sober|wrk> up in the air to relieve some stress
<Sober|wrk> she just smashed it into a ceiling panel and knocked it down on her head
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Quote: 41882; Rating: 338; [+|-]
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<@Dza> you g/f's so fat her pic is ~3 megs?
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Quote: 41884; Rating: 225; [+|-]
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<Wayne-aw> 99.9% of the time, the problem lies between the keyboard and the chair.
|
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Quote: 41890; Rating: 673; [+|-]
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*** Drive_by_Banning has joined #x1
*** ChanServ sets mode: +o Drive_by_Banning
*** Drive_by_Banning sets mode: +b *!*@*.aol.com
*** Assassin was kicked by Drive_by_Banning (out!)
*** Drive_by_Banning has left #x1
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Quote: 41895; Rating: 357; [+|-]
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<0oyeaho0> Hey, i have a new boyfriend. hes so dreamy, and i'm so in love with him. Hes so nice and sweet. I just adore him. I feel like ive known him forever.
<oaklandfoo1> where's he from?
<0oyeaho0> uh, im not sure.
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Quote: 41896; Rating: 190; [+|-]
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(Sober|smk) 905-847-6000fuck
(Sober|smk) er
(Sober|smk) mental note
(Sober|smk) never use irc as notepad
(Sober|smk) u will forget and hit enter :)
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Quote: 41903; Rating: 532; [+|-]
|
<Denium> cassy do you mind if i delegate something to ya?
<Cassy> as long as i can do it in the morning ....i'm totally dead .....had a gig earlier tonight and i'm like a zombie lol
<Denium> wow
<Denium> i only do like 500mb/day
<Denium> at most
<Cassy> a SHOW
<Denium> ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
<Cassy> you know ....play music!?
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Quote: 41922; Rating: 163; [+|-]
|
<TNK> sweden is the most wasted land in the world- so many beautiful girls, and because it's cold there they wear too many clothes =]
|
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Quote: 41949; Rating: 496; [+|-]
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<Nago> JESUS IS A COOL GUY! I BET HE LIKED PORNO!
<Pete> I bet he liked bondage
<Pete> took it too seriousley one day though....
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|
Quote: 41955; Rating: 24; [+|-]
|
<Nago> i saw this sticker
<Nago> that said
<Nago> Got Jesus?
<Nago> and i was thinking
<Nago> got milk? i want a glass of jesus.
<Nago> Jesus h. christ.
<Nago> id like a glass of that.
<Venoman> frothy warm glass-o-christ
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Quote: 41958; Rating: 141; [+|-]
|
<@BloodNose> ooh, I could be getting cable in the next 2 months-ish
<@BloodNose> :D:DD
<@BloodNose> what's that WB of blender's that makes some reference to me getting cable, can anyone remember?
<@BloodNose> it's like "the day blood gets cable, I'll <something something>"
<@sevr> "quit sucking cock"
<@sevr> keep in mind tho he never thought you'd get cable :/
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