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Quote: 14350; Rating: 108; [+|-]
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<malcolm> c pointers work just like laser pointers
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Quote: 14351; Rating: 306; [+|-]
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<malcolm> I would appreciate it more if I didn't have to set JAVA_HOME and ANT_HOME and HILL_DEPTH and AVERAGE_LIFESPAN_OF_INSECT and NUMBER_OF_LEGS and DIRECTION_OF_PREVAILING_WIND and BIRTHDAY
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Quote: 14352; Rating: 396; [+|-]
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<SophiesCat> my room is making ominous popping sounds.
<malcolm> ghost popcorn
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Quote: 14355; Rating: 348; [+|-]
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<Shelstra> :((
<Shelstra> my poor fishie
<|KazzA|> :o what happened
<Shelstra> nothing but...
<Shelstra> one of his eyes is black
<Shelstra> i think he might be blind :(
<|KazzA|> aww
<Shelstra> we only just noticed it
<Mousey> like it cares anyway
<Mousey> theres not much to see
<staticx> every three seconds it will say 'holyfuck, i can only see out of one eye...'
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Quote: 14357; Rating: 114; [+|-]
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<Farnarcle> why are you helping her to knock you?
<GruMM[GruMM[Away[GruMM]]]> coz if it is going to be done, it should be done right'
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Quote: 14359; Rating: 161; [+|-]
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<^_-> DICK SMELLS LIKE PICKLES.
<^_-> PARTIALLY BECAUSE OF THE DRIED SEMEN.
<Funk> My dried semen doesn't smell like pickles
<Funk> :/
<Funk> It smells like bleach
<^_-> THAT'S WHAT MINE SMELLS LIKE WHEN IT'S WET
<^_-> IT'S LIKE BLEACHY-CHLORINE
<Funk> That was my excuse for jacking off in the swimming pool
<Funk> "But I thought it would make the pool cleaner :( :( :("
<wildkarrdex> THAT WAS YOUR COURT DEFENCE?
<wildkarrdex> YOU COULD HAVE CLAIMED IT WAS AN INVOLUNTARY SPASM
<Funk> An involuntary spasm that made me hold a 6 year old underneath me for the duration?
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Quote: 14361; Rating: 71; [+|-]
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(@Xit) a mad script would be: "you have been caught mastubating 6 times today by your webcam, this makes an average of 3 times per day."
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Quote: 14366; Rating: 440; [+|-]
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<^_-> oftentimes i'll be looking at porn and feel the urge for movies
<^_-> so i'll go on random filesharing programs and start downloading some
<^_-> but by the time i orgasm the movies still aren't done
<^_-> and i delete all of the movies.
<Funk> That happens to me too
<Funk> You want to know what's worse?
<Funk> I have a 2Meg/sec LAN connection.
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Quote: 14367; Rating: 135; [+|-]
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<Krogzar> !8ball may i kick you?
<SDs8ball> Krogzar : YES IN DUE TIME
*** SDs8ball was kicked by P ((Krogzar) ta time is due)
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Quote: 14369; Rating: 541; [+|-]
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<_aa_> ebay just bought paypal
<tezzO> they did?!
<tardmac> what was their winning bid?
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Quote: 14373; Rating: 288; [+|-]
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<Despot> I just had a dream about cheese and eating it
<Despot> the cheese had eyes and kept looking at me
<Despot> thats all go back to work
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Quote: 14374; Rating: 244; [+|-]
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<@jaffy> how the fuck does my moniter get so dirty, its like some cunt eats his meals off it while im asleep
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Quote: 14375; Rating: -8; [+|-]
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Che`work has joined #sh
<Che`work> who's alive?
<lord_kro> about 12 million towelheads in the pakistan india area...but for how long WHO CAN SAY
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Quote: 14382; Rating: 342; [+|-]
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<Kharn> D'ya think colouring my eye ball with a permanent marker will hurt?
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Quote: 14388; Rating: 9; [+|-]
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<Shyster> pikachan, hentai scared me =(
<@PikaChan> well uhh
<@PikaChan> what am i supposed to do about that? :/
<@PikaChan> oh btw shy remind me to kill you later
<Shyster> k
<@PikaChan> thanks
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Quote: 14389; Rating: 182; [+|-]
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<PrincessLeia2> caffine is much less deadly tho'
<MykBev> not if you smoke it!
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Quote: 14399; Rating: 195; [+|-]
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<radii> i'm unRARing, listening to an MP3, AOLing, useing FlashFXP, Serv-U, AIM, mIRC and going to that wepage
<baloo_> aoling = molesting 13 year-old girls online?
<pagan> baloo: no it means your messaging them to come over and get molested
<radii> yeah, duh!
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Quote: 14402; Rating: -36; [+|-]
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* Tsukiyo buys a cake for TC but instead of some woman popping out...some old man does
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Quote: 14403; Rating: 310; [+|-]
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<PrincessLeia2> i woke up this morning all dressed, and in bed with my keyboard
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Quote: 14404; Rating: 135; [+|-]
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<Rubicant> one day Im going to have a real woman over
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Quote: 14405; Rating: 379; [+|-]
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<Thrawn> i want to die and go to a place where i can screw tons of chicks.
<Thrawn> actually
<Thrawn> fuck dying
<Thrawn> i just wan tto go to a place where i can screw tons of chicks.
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Quote: 14407; Rating: 7; [+|-]
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<Syntopicon> see, thats Ash's problem
<Syntopicon> she was trying to swallow the snortable
<Syntopicon> prolly snorts the swallowable
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Quote: 14408; Rating: 302; [+|-]
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<brak> hey bro, heard you were...cooking
<Time> fire engines gave it away?
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Quote: 14409; Rating: 407; [+|-]
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* Mephisto is impressed of PrincessLeia2's knowledge of the Faustian religion
<PrincessLeia2> actually.... I just play Diablo 2
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Quote: 14414; Rating: -11; [+|-]
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<[s-fury]> windows .net is the plot to take over the world.
<KittyBoy> the computer world?
<[s-fury]> no, the WORLD!
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Quote: 14418; Rating: -4; [+|-]
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<ZoNeSeeK> *twists arms around, crouches on knees* GUESS WHAT ?!?
<ZoNeSeeK> aha ! ive morphed into crouching-person from standing-person.
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Quote: 14425; Rating: 103; [+|-]
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(united_as_one): what would happen if i installed linux on windows
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Quote: 14426; Rating: 546; [+|-]
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<PrincessLeia2> yeah we wrote linux install directions for Unreal Tournament, and I made the cuteyist UT Tux image for it on my webpage!
<PrincessLeia2> ...
<PrincessLeia2> wow, i just managed to be totally geeky and very girly in the same sentance O_O
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Quote: 14429; Rating: 145; [+|-]
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<DownstairsVex> we need mirc for unix
<PrincessLeia2> i think mirc for unix would be a sin %)
<DownstairsVex> but i'd rather laugh with the sinners then cry wit the saints
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Quote: 14431; Rating: 216; [+|-]
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<antix> im bored
<antix> i think i might go mod my toilet
<Shady> what are you going to do? :S
<antix> i think i might add some little flashin lights so i can read the paper in the dark...
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Quote: 14439; Rating: 9; [+|-]
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<AmaroK> LoL, this quote thing is probly the best bed time reading matterial since the bible
<AmaroK> Infact, im some satisfied i might even have a ciggarette now
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Quote: 14441; Rating: 141; [+|-]
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*** Meeko has joined #Animorphs
<Meeko> ennnik!
<Meeko> I've been pantsed while commando!
<Meeko> "What an interesting turn of events." "THEY'RE FLESH COLORED UNDERWEAR." "God, I wish."
<Meeko> So now I'm holed up inside for the rest of today, nurturing my wounded pride.
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Quote: 14443; Rating: 281; [+|-]
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<Ria> Type in the search word,
<Ria> apply pressure to button,
<Ria> then read the results.
<Ria> it's a haiku!
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Quote: 14444; Rating: 206; [+|-]
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<tokage> im a pathetic fanboy when it comes to king
<tokage> I'd read tampon labels if someone told me he wrote them
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Quote: 14448; Rating: 322; [+|-]
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<@harb> Andy: 01:16 < Danelope> http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view.php?id=30319
<@kitten> JESUS FUCK
<@kitten> THERE ARE NOW SEVEN FUCKING POPUP WINDOWS
<@harb> Oh yeah.
<@harb> Andy uses IE.
<@harb> Sorry about that.
< Danelope> Hahaha.
< Danelope> IE is for cocksksksk.
<@harb> <cypher> I don't even see the popups anymore.
<@harb> <cypher> Just blonde. Brunette. Redhead.
< Danelope> <cypher> Just viagra, penis enlargement, 581% more cum.
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Quote: 14449; Rating: 1143; [+|-]
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<@harb> Sith are like the script kiddies of Force users.
<@harb> They all have silly handles.
<@harb> "Darth Maul", "Darth Sidious", "Darth Tyranous".
<@harb> "d00d ur most l33t l3tz g0 own sum j3di lol"
< mdxi> <ObiWan> Do not turn ot the Dark Side, Anakin
< mdxi> <an4k1n> STFU F4G
<@harb> <tyr4nous> d00d j0in m3 w3 c4n pwn 2gether!!
<@harb> <ObiWan> I'll never join you, Dooku.
<@harb> <tyr4nous> suk
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Quote: 14453; Rating: 373; [+|-]
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<griffin> im disappointed in my mom
<pagan> me too
<pagan> she did a bad job
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Quote: 14454; Rating: 246; [+|-]
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<gweeds> wow
<gweeds> i am now completely out of credit card debt
<gweeds> time to dive back in
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Quote: 14456; Rating: 505; [+|-]
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<cix> they're outside aren't they?
<s> what is "outside"?
<cix> it's that place they show on "Discover"
<cix> I think it's near Montana.
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Quote: 14460; Rating: 159; [+|-]
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<[oQp]> anyone ever used Delta Airlines here?
<alec_eso> i have
<[oQp]> how is it?
<carlsb3rg> They always come down
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Quote: 14462; Rating: 168; [+|-]
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<@Breathe> I hurt my back last week, and it is still hurting. >:(
<SirPrux> Maybe you sprained a muscle
<SirPrux> I sprained a cucumber once
<@Breathe> ...
<SirPrux> man did it hurt
<@Breathe> you sprained a cucumber?
<huzyrdadi> I think he means he sprained his asshole /using/ a cucumber
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Quote: 14466; Rating: 274; [+|-]
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<Amante> Do you guys know how many 24hr porno shops they have going down 75?
<@Breathe> 138.
<@Breathe> And you don't want to know how I know that.
<Amante> I thought I recognized your picture :)
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Quote: 14471; Rating: 284; [+|-]
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<marlais> for i am no longer a stranger in the ways of the woman :P
<SoulSteal> marlais: you finally killed one, eh?
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Quote: 14475; Rating: 119; [+|-]
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[Nothingface] fuck, I can't type
[@PMV] its easy
[@PMV] step 1: bang head on keyboard
[@PMV] step 2: repeat
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Quote: 14482; Rating: 166; [+|-]
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<clay> i heard joey submitted the first rfc for irc
<clay> something along the lines of D00D WE NEED WAREZ TRADING 2 ORGANIZE N SHIT
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Quote: 14485; Rating: 286; [+|-]
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<jodaro> hmm, my mom just invited me over for dinner
<jodaro> mm, free food
<stu> you mean your mum doesn't charge for dinner?
<jodaro> no
<stu> damn
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|
Quote: 14486; Rating: 3; [+|-]
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<infra> yeah I got it now, thanks.
<EarthWork> infra: Don't thank us. Thank lil' baby Jesus.
<FilthyM> I keep baby Jesus in my shoe.
ominous watches a lightning bolt energize above infra's house....
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Quote: 14490; Rating: -8; [+|-]
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<TeamXtrem> i must suck
<Ly> TeamXtrem, you would know how it works :)
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Quote: 14492; Rating: 1610; [+|-]
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<PinkShirt> jt has a handicapped plate, because his penis is so small.
<PinkShirt> it's classed as a "sever disability"
<jtstocker> ha ya
<jtstocker> HEY! i dont have a fucking car
<jtstocker> asshole
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Quote: 14500; Rating: 345; [+|-]
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@(F|uid) candlelight dinners suck
@(F|uid) i cant see my food
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