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Quote: 10409; Rating: 42; [+|-]
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<Encapsulate> "Sean, what's your department called?"
<Encapsulate> "I have a department now?"
<Encapsulate> "WE need to route these Skip books to you"
<Encapsulate> "I have a department?"
<Encapsulate> "Right, what is it called for the skip page?""
<Toast> heh
<Encapsulate> "A whole department?"
<Encapsulate> "Yes"
<Encapsulate> "You mean interconnect?"
<Encapsulate> "Yes! Ok, we'll put that down"
<Encapsulate> "I feel more important when I'm called 'Fixed Network'."
<Toast> heh
<Encapsulate> "More important?"
<Encapsulate> "Yea."
<Encapsulate> "Ok, You can be fixed network" |
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Quote: 10422; Rating: 180; [+|-]
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<nwinter> i am the king of EXCEL.
<nwinter> kinda.
<nwinter> i used staroffice to make an excel document.
<nwinter> and learn how to make a spreadsheet in the process.
<Lacroix> i bow to your mastery :)
<nwinter> i am now THAT MUCH MORE of a marketable unix admin!
<nwinter> what does all of this mean?
<nwinter> my boss is a retard. |
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Quote: 10423; Rating: 254; [+|-]
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<nwinter> i think i could've made a better spreadsheet with graph paper
and a crayon.
<hep>u00a0 hahaha
<nwinter> i had to put an audit i did into a spreadsheet because
apparently my boss doesn't like documents in the UNIVERSALLY READABLE
format known as ASCII.
<nwinter> he will soon receive my weekly status report as an attachment
named "micromanagement.txt" |
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Quote: 10426; Rating: 33; [+|-]
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<nwinter> i am personally more concerned about israel and palestine
cutting ties with each other than who's whipping who. :)
<nwinter> but perhaps i am being trendy in my concern for more interesting
issues. :) |
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Quote: 10429; Rating: 254; [+|-]
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<Toast> WASHINGTON (Reuters) - The Pentagon (news - web sites) has
received information indicating that U.S. warplanes on Monday might have
accidentally bombed a home for senior citizens near the Afghan city of
Herat, a senior defense official said on Tuesday.
<Toast> *sigh*
<dert> oh god
<Toast> I guess that's what happens when you round up the dumbest 10% of
society, give them really big bombs and let them go nuts 10,000 miles
away |
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Quote: 10430; Rating: 306; [+|-]
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* cj_ installs svgalib.
<cj_> gonna test quake2 on linux
<nwinter> nice.
<cj_> then i can play with myself
<nwinter> GRODEY.
<cj_> no seriously. my monitors face inwards at me, and both the mice are
within an arms reach. i can chase myself around. |
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Quote: 10434; Rating: 163; [+|-]
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<bizzy> great, i get TWO doomed projects
<bizzy> "hey, we canned the guy doing this stuff too. Can you start work
on re-inventing the wheel asap?" |
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Quote: 10445; Rating: 445; [+|-]
|
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<Lokonopa> you know what would be the funniest thing to see? when those spelling bee contests come on tv, and the announcer gives a kid a really hard word to spell...and at that exact moment a guy in the back screams "HOLY FUCK!" |
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Quote: 10456; Rating: 381; [+|-]
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<Starscream> okay, you guys suck and blow simultaneously, making you all
excellent trumpet players. |
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Quote: 10461; Rating: 224; [+|-]
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<melanarchy> I mean I don't want to be too mean
<melanarchy> but there are levels of acceptable IRC stupidity |
|
Quote: 10462; Rating: 195; [+|-]
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<jej> if you dated me, you would've recognized me, and stopped talking to
me by now. |
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Quote: 10464; Rating: 252; [+|-]
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<Mand> If I had to be an x-men, i'd be Gambit.
<Ithaqua> I thought you WERE an ex-man. |
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Quote: 10465; Rating: 386; [+|-]
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<Squinky> Are all Vietnamese people named Nguyen or something?
<Sopabuena> Yes
<Squinky> I know about 8 with that last name, but none with a different one
<Sopabuena> If you go to Vietnam and shout "NGUYEN" everyone will look at you |
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Quote: 10468; Rating: 382; [+|-]
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<Seros_work`> :|u00a0 <--- this is my interested face
<Ithaqua> 8=====Du00a0 <--- This is my penis. Suck it.
<deVoca_work> life-size |
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Quote: 10469; Rating: 267; [+|-]
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<hep> husbands girlfriend EXTREMELY annoying
<Ach|medicated> damn husbands, and their whiny girlfriends!
<Ach|medicated> (number 37 of The Big List of Things You Never Expected to
Say) |
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Quote: 10471; Rating: 186; [+|-]
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<hep> you told me!
<hep> all the e is going to your brain :>
<Acheron> isn't that what e is supposed to do?
<Encapsulate> No
<Encapsulate> It goes to your Pee pee
<Acheron> unless you keep your "frontal lobe" in your "pants", that is
<Encapsulate> and activates the secret Pee Pee Power
<Encapsulate> Or PPP
<Encapsulate> "PPP LINK UP!"
<Acheron> what? You become impotent, but you're able to use your wang
modem to dial up to the internet? |
|
Quote: 10472; Rating: 52; [+|-]
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<deimos_> so now i gotta get bitchx working the way i want
<deimos_> and modify the stats util for bitch log format
<deimos_> hh, bitchx rather
<Toast> yeah, I was going to say that hep doesn't HAVEu00a0 a log format.. |
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Quote: 10473; Rating: 33; [+|-]
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<jej> i will 0wn services again.
<Toast> my /away r00t kit isn't working |
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Quote: 10474; Rating: 745; [+|-]
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<Charlesowns> Man i was surfin porn and like "normal" surfin at the same time, so my mom comes in and i quick as hell tab down the porn. So now im looking at a SWAT vest and an Mp5 submachinegun trying to hide the giant penis in my pants. Then all of a sudden this realy gay male voice speaks out realy loud goin "i want to suck your big dick ans swallow your hot sperm" then like 100 popups open up all consisting of hardcore fetish gay
<Charlesowns> man my mom started crying and now she thinks im gay... it owns |
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Quote: 10477; Rating: 57; [+|-]
|
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<jej> WHY ARE YOU HAVING AN INDUSTRIAL MUSIC PISSING CONTEST. |
|
Quote: 10478; Rating: 87; [+|-]
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<Acheron> hep: :P
<Acheron> And I say that from the bottom of my heart.
<hep> please to not be sticking it out unless you intend on using it.
<hep> today
<Acheron> Well, my tongue is a little longer than most, but S.F. is a
helluva reach, even for more gifted folks
<Mitzy> despicable.
<Acheron> Sorry. I don't get as much tongue-stretching exercise as I used
to.
<para> that's a .sigfile right there.,
<Acheron> keep your .sig out of my .file! perv! |
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Quote: 10479; Rating: 54; [+|-]
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<tamara> i still can't reach lj :( I
<Twid> really?u00a0 i just got there
<tamara> obviously livejournal hates canada.
<jej> WHO DOESN'T.
<Twid> they probably banned all of canada
<Twid> or dedicated a modem line to routing to canada
<tamara> 14.4 |
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Quote: 10480; Rating: 359; [+|-]
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<Encapsulate> So
<Encapsulate> I was going to say you should name thechild the next word I
heard over the cube walls.
<Encapsulate> Unfortunatly, the next word I heard was "Auschwitz" |
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Quote: 10481; Rating: 353; [+|-]
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<jej> i need to "find" a copy of q3a for os 9/X too.
<jej> and wolfenstein.
<Toast> I need to "find" a copy of "your mom" for "my wang"
<jej> ":("
<cj_> "hehe" |
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Quote: 10484; Rating: 181; [+|-]
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<cj_> i have symlinked pine to mutt on my system and put a
reasonably cool .muttrc in everyone's home directoryu00a0 that uses pine
<cj_> i may be a nazi, but they'll thank me later |
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Quote: 10486; Rating: 467; [+|-]
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<cj_> we lost 20,000 rows of customer data
<Twid> cj: eek!
<Twid> I hope the innocent were blamed.
<Kin-San> 20k? holy...
<cj_> we blamed the guy that didn't come in today.
<Kin-San> lol
<Twid> good.u00a0 as long as normal business procedures were followed |
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Quote: 10488; Rating: 228; [+|-]
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BeHeMoTh101 : but he told my dad that the whores who worked for him were the most honest people he ever knew
TX Luder : interesting
TX Luder : i would think it would be quite hard to not be honest after youve had a dick in you ass
TX Luder : thats when ya realize life needs to be taken seriously |
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Quote: 10489; Rating: 104; [+|-]
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<deimos> what are you installing?
<hep> your mom
<hep> YourMom v.2.4.5
<deimos> wow
<deimos> yourmom kept panicing on me
<hep> she does that deimos |
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Quote: 10490; Rating: 161; [+|-]
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<Encapsulate> I spent the last few minutes going over Liberache's online
presence.
<Encapsulate> I won't be having sex for a while. |
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Quote: 10493; Rating: 49; [+|-]
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<Kin-San> bizzy: monsters inc. XD
<bizzy> i need to see that
<Kin-San> its funny as all hell
<Toast> yeah, good movie
<hep> oooh yeah
<hep> i <heart> that movie
<hep> went and saw it with this lame guy though
<hep> what is his name again? god he is a freak
<Kin-San> lol
<hep> (i went with Toast. Which is why this is funny, for the kids at home playing along) :>
<Toast> I'm used to ladies not remembering my name
<Kin-San> I figured something like this
<Toast> cuz I'm such a play-ah
<quatoria> you're such a play-ah they don't remember you?
<quatoria> or is that just because of the ruhypnol? |
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Quote: 10497; Rating: 278; [+|-]
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<Trelane>it'd be really weird if we died at the same time
<LOAF> We could die at 8/7 central. |
|
Quote: 10499; Rating: 334; [+|-]
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* go_boy getting his haujobb on
<jej> i read that as 'handjob'
<go_boy> i assumed you would
<jej> you can always count on me.
<go_boy> for a handjob?
<jej> of course.
<go_boy> rockin. |
|
Quote: 10500; Rating: 233; [+|-]
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<Encapsulate> How come you never go shopping with me?
<hep> cause you dont put out
<Encapsulate> Dude, I so do.
<Encapsulate> You even have pictures, that you taunt me with.
<hep> lies!
<Encapsulate> Sure, I was drugged up and unconscious, but I PUT OUT!
<hep> well yeah you put out THEN
<Encapsulate> You said so!
<hep> but I mean i spent a FORTUNE in roofies! |
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Quote: 10504; Rating: -3; [+|-]
|
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<jej> i want to get down lower than atlantis. |
|
Quote: 10505; Rating: 211; [+|-]
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<cj_> i hate it when someone at work has to point out to me that my
shirt is both inside out and backwards.
<jej> is it?
<cj_> it is.
<cj_> i pulled the whole Fashion Statement routine.. |
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Quote: 10508; Rating: 119; [+|-]
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<Xaotika> well its kinda hard to play with a ping over 200
<Acheron> whine, whine, whine... ;)
<Xaotika> actually i can manage 250 or 300
<cj_> you don't complain about your ping when you are winning :)
<Xaotika> thats because my ping is not over 300 when i am winning. DUH. |
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Quote: 10509; Rating: 27; [+|-]
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<Acheron> Don't hpb's brag about their l33t skillz and high ping when
they're winning?
<Xaotika> you think i have 1337 skills? HAHAHAHSAHASHAHAHAFA
<Xaotika> they rest of you just suck :) |
|
Quote: 10510; Rating: 129; [+|-]
|
<quatoria> it was high-larious
<Acheron> wait...you mean you were high at the time and thought it was
funny?
<hep> high "at the time?"
<hep> this implies a state of non-highness at some point
<hep> :> |
|
Quote: 10512; Rating: 406; [+|-]
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<cj_> this guy is selling STEAKS door to door
<jej> SWEET.
<cj_> he's hella pushy too.
<jej> BUY MY STEAK!
<cj_> he's giving her his cellphone number
<cj_> he actually brought stake with him to show her
<jej> LOOK AT MY STEAK!
<cj_> he's showing her each piece of meat now
<spides> ahaha
<spides> Door to Door Meat
<spides> maybe he's propositioning her in some weird fetishy way
<cj_> this guy is a freak
<cj_> if i had answered the door he woulda been gone about 10 minutes ago
<cj_> who the hell does door-to-door at 8:30
<spides> who the fuck sells steak door to door
<cj_> good fucking question. this guy might be au00a0 nut |
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Quote: 10561; Rating: 58; [+|-]
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<cabbagehead227>: is a closet queer anything like a bed bug, do you suppose? |
|
Quote: 10567; Rating: 394; [+|-]
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<Antifuse> christ it's hot out today too
<Bionic_6> yea
<Bionic_6> sweating like pedophile in a playground |
|
Quote: 10571; Rating: 158; [+|-]
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<Harrit> dv you arround?
<Bionic_6> digital video it all around us
<Bionic_6> it's in the air u breathe
<Bionic_6> the water u drink
<Bionic_6> the unconcisous girl u fuck
<Bionic_6> everywhere
<Harrit> dv8... you still around?
<Harrit> smart ass |
|
Quote: 10606; Rating: 486; [+|-]
|
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<Gr1nR> I tell girls...\"I need a file - but its stuck in this archive named PANTS.ZIP - what should I do???\" |
|
Quote: 10607; Rating: 466; [+|-]
|
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<Glide20> americans are so stupied |
|
Quote: 10609; Rating: 448; [+|-]
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(+aileur): man you guys rock
(+aileur): killed 120 people in a wedding
(@SeeDee): news here says 20
(+JoeYoung): eh?
(@headc4se): well they're canadian cd, so using the metric system
(+JoeYoung): metric people
(+JoeYoung): 1 standard person=6 metric people |
|
Quote: 10610; Rating: 22; [+|-]
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<netwerk> who the fuck are you and what do you want
<mahone> u00fd want met you speak bat u00fd from en turkey
<mahone> end u00fd can t gut speak en englesh |
|
Quote: 10611; Rating: 139; [+|-]
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<+b00st> leaving for sleep and other related things
<+b00st> don't ask |
|
Quote: 10615; Rating: 135; [+|-]
|
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<WOGBOY_24_7> hey what is windows 98 called = Windows NT4.0 or Windows 9x |
|
Quote: 10618; Rating: 134; [+|-]
|
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<Speedsta> heh, just wasted 25c on a msg saying: ":`(" |
|
Quote: 10626; Rating: 2282; [+|-]
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<CompuMan> The tragedy of Canada is they could have had British culture, French cooking, and American technology, but instead they got American culture, British cooking, and French technology. |
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