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Quote: 390681; Rating: 513; [+|-]
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zhiryst: its what p2p is all about
zhiryst: i just leave it on overnight
zhiryst: let people take shit from me
zhiryst: i take shit from them
zhiryst: p2p is just a variety of communism
djnogo 4: haha
djnogo 4: you sure?
djnogo 4: i picture it more as a circle jerk :-)
zhiryst: yeah, but who's getting bukakeed?
zhiryst: the RIAA?
djnogo 4: bingo :-)
zhiryst: A HAHAHAHA
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Quote: 391193; Rating: 1210; [+|-]
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*** Mavert changes topic to 'Men are like cement... after getting laid, they take a long time to get hard.
(EviLGirL-) Women are like a carpet... lay them right the first time and you can walk all over them forever''
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Quote: 391224; Rating: 1167; [+|-]
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<bloodeu> Outback Steakhouse has ridiculous prices
<bloodeu> i'm here now with my date
<bloodeu> palm pilot + wifi is cool
<bloodeu> i got my keyboard
<jomomma> ...
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Quote: 391241; Rating: 1461; [+|-]
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aakashdheer: my grandmother gave me a wish
aakashdheer: i could either have a perfect memory or a huge penis
aakashdheer: i can't remember my decision
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Quote: 391795; Rating: 561; [+|-]
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(@b0wser) i like the fact that she says "we can still arrange fuck dates" even though we're not together
(@Bocki) a fuck girlfriend: nothing better then that
(@jason127) I had a relationship like that
(@jason127) then one day she just disapeared
(@jason127) then two years later i seen her in Tatoo magazine
(@jason127) she had moved to Ohio
(@Bocki) sounds like Forrest Gump - The XXX Version
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Quote: 392195; Rating: 808; [+|-]
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<@graspee_leemoor> brazil v italy women's volleyball is about to start
<@graspee_leemoor> you'll get no sense out of me
* Snaar hands graspee some tissues
< Bucket_Mouse> who you cheering for
<%Snaar> the girls
< Bucket_Mouse> which girls?
<%Snaar> you know
<%Snaar> two legs
<%Snaar> two arms
<%Snaar> various holes
<%Snaar> THE GIRLS
< Bucket_Mouse> ITALY GIRLS OR BRAZIL GIRLS
<%Snaar> why are you being racist :-
<%Snaar> they are both fine girls
< Bucket_Mouse> oh, i thought you were playing favorites
<%Snaar> the point of female sports is just to enjoy the show
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Quote: 392267; Rating: 1845; [+|-]
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* kitten has quit IRC (Killed (NickOP (Kill requested by kittster)))
<BlackAIR> kitten got killed??
<Propagandhi> ALRIGHT, WHO IN HERE IS MASTERBATING!?
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Quote: 392288; Rating: 1154; [+|-]
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<monkey216> FUCK! im dead
<wrenchy> why?
<monkey216> Im sitting here hitting my bong and my dad just imed me from korea and was like, I can see you in the webcam
<monkey216> I forgot I had the damned camera turned on
<wrenchy> LMAO see you next year dumbass
<monkey216> fuck.....
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Quote: 392848; Rating: 526; [+|-]
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<X-G> Yay, I wrote a todo list
<X-G> Now I can procrastinate more efficiently!
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Quote: 393177; Rating: 1112; [+|-]
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<Poinky> so, there is to be war between us...
<brett1479> war?
<p3nt4g0n> huh?
<Mororvia> good god ya'll
<p3nt4g0n> wha?
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Quote: 393209; Rating: 971; [+|-]
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<Matrix_McCloud> i can't imagine sticking anything in your mouth farther than like 4 inches
<Matrix_McCloud> without puking
<Oolong> you have to do it a certain way
<Oolong> if you line your throat up right it just slides in
<Oolong> or if his schlong is bent downwars
<Matrix_McCloud> then if it touches the edge, your nose lights up red and beeps
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Quote: 393229; Rating: 131; [+|-]
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<JonTG> What's more fun than swinging a dead baby around on a rope?
<JonTG> Stopping it with a shovel.
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Quote: 393241; Rating: 552; [+|-]
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<Matt-san> Over the hill women have experience. :)
<Kataclysm> And saggy boobz
<Matt-san> They flop back and forth like mudflaps.
<Kataclysm> Thank you for the lovely visual, Matt.
<Raiden> Its like when you go to the nursing home
<Raiden> and say "SHOW ME YOUR TITS"
<Kataclysm> I'm going to kill you now. Please don't take it personal.
<Raiden> and they take off their pants
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Quote: 393304; Rating: 907; [+|-]
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[2nd_law_of_thermodynamics] why are the vaginas always blurred out in hentai?
[dsgasdsa] vaginas can bend light
[dsgasdsa] 'the black hole'
[2nd_law_of_thermodynamics] they must do it just to piss me off
[dsgasdsa] it's because you should be focusing on their personality
[dsgasdsa] shallow cunt
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Quote: 393323; Rating: 90; [+|-]
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<Obiwan> Koreans are kicking ass at men's all around gymnastics...
<Obiwan> ....don't ask why I'm watching men's gymnastics....
<Nimdae> you like their tight asses
<Obiwan> well they don't show ass that much
<Obiwan> their pants are too loose
<Obiwan> sigh
<Obiwan> actually I turned it on and I saw a korean.
<Nimdae> you just proved you are watching their asses
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Quote: 393357; Rating: 366; [+|-]
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<Jetsuo> Ew, Ashlee Simpson is #1 on the Billboards. Jetsuo must go kill a kitten now.
<KitBoxPocket> Jetsuo: every time you kill a kitten, God masturbates.
<Jetsuo> lmao
<KitBoxPocket> You dont want God flogging his holy log, do you?
<Nyschashi-Seikun> when god ejaculates, it snows
<KitBoxPocket> Oh, snow day, sweet
<Jetsuo> and when God craps?
<KitBoxPocket> A republican is elected
<Jetsuo> XD
<KitBoxPocket> "Mommy! Mommy! Every time a Republican gets elected, it means God just had a really great shit!'
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Quote: 393451; Rating: 394; [+|-]
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* elisteran subscribes seriumu to spamlists
<elisteran> would you rather get nigerian 419 scams, or hawt lesbian pr0n ?
<Pavel> elisteran: As if the two were mutually exclusive.
<elisteran> Dear Mr. Smith, my name is Motoba Kwambe, and I am legal counsel representing the family of the late Prime Minister of Nigeria, Bouncy Bubbles. Her nude coed widow has the opportunity to retrieve $15 million stashed away in a bank account, but needs a US citizen to ...
<Pavel> elisteran: That works.
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Quote: 393507; Rating: 27; [+|-]
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<neekohh> eh, where should i go?
<tzigaite> gamespot by target might give you more
<neekohh> gamespot is that place near target right
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Quote: 393554; Rating: 1719; [+|-]
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<watashi-wa>necrophilia is dead boring
<chersucks> wtf?!?
<watashi-wa>try incest instead
<watashi-wa>it's only relatively boring :p
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Quote: 393563; Rating: -357; [+|-]
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<JoeDawson> "Tour De France Winner Lance Armstrong was stripped of his title after 3 substances banned by the french were found in his hotel room"
<KloA> haha
<JoeDawson> The three banned substances... Deoderant, Toothepaste, and soap.
<JoeDawson> *rimshot*
<JoeDawson> HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
* JoeDawson TEH FUNNAY
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Quote: 393574; Rating: 737; [+|-]
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[sides] the other day my aunt and cousins were over my house for the night and them and my family were in the living room
[sides] some how we started talking about pamela anderson. my sister was like "well it's not like she's in porn or anything"
[sides] and they were all arguing over if she's in porn or not.
[sides] I wasn't really paying attention because I was trying to fix my dad's computer, which is in the same room. but I heard them talking about porn so I listened up
[sides] and when my sister said "no she's never been in a real porn or anything"
[sides] I spoke up and said "oh yes she has!"
[sides] everyone looks at me funny and I hadn't realized what I did wrong yet and my dad's like "how do you know that?"
[sides] so I just got up and went upstairs.
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Quote: 393623; Rating: 10; [+|-]
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<[foreel]Torisutamu> Warning!
<[foreel]LagginTimes> Warning: The following commercial may not be suited for young children.
<[foreel]LagginTimes> Tired of watching college girls run around like morons and take off their clothes?
<[foreel]LagginTimes> Of course you're not!
<[foreel]Torisutamu> Tired of those same old girls at those same beaches? We thought not!
<[foreel]Torisutamu> Fucker beat me to it
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Quote: 393641; Rating: 398; [+|-]
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isotec: so my dad decides to be nice and put a chocolate on top of my LCD monitor (its one of thoes ones with booze in it
isotec: so i come by l8r and im like cool
isotec: i pick it up as as i do so it starts to drip on the top of the monitor and some booze leaks out
isotec: im thinking well that was totaly smart dad now i have whisky or somthing and chocolate oozing around up there
isotec: but im like hey cant let that chocolate go to waste
isotec: i start to lick up the tasty mess and when im in mid lick my dad walks in and is like "Jesus son, i know you many like your computer but this is just rediculous!"
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Quote: 393703; Rating: 487; [+|-]
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<EvolvEarth> /nickserv identify iloveanal
<EvolvEarth> FUCK
<kupo> How did you know my password?!
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Quote: 393714; Rating: 330; [+|-]
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310||slackerr: man, they shut off the water in our building
310||slackerr: its gonna be off the entire day
510||joey: that SUCKS@
310||slackerr: the worst part is that i took a shit before i knew it was off
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Quote: 393802; Rating: 303; [+|-]
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<_blackcat> in the bash how do I get it so that it will show the all the dirs in a different color?
<octalpuss> i believe that's the --gay option
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Quote: 393812; Rating: 1009; [+|-]
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<tegu> WANNA PLAY IRC TIC TAC TOE?
<tegu> 1 2 3
<slip> K
<tegu> 4 5 6
<tegu> 7
<tegu> erm
<slip> LOL
<tegu> 1 2 3
<tegu> 4 5 6
<tegu> 7 8 9
<tegu> you go first
<slip> 1
<tegu> 5
<tegu> UR TURN
<slip> 4
<tegu> 7
<slip> 3
<tegu> 2
<slip> 9
<tegu> 8 gg
<slip> gg
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Quote: 393869; Rating: 390; [+|-]
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<imanz> sorry about my server il get it up
* absynthe wonders where she's heard THAT before...
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Quote: 393904; Rating: 97; [+|-]
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<D1> ugh
<D1> they put me on lithium!
<sorbix> did they perscribe you batteries
<D1> not yet.
<D1> but who knows what they'll give me next time.
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Quote: 394101; Rating: 583; [+|-]
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<Nique> *eyes spam* 'Supersize your penis.' Does that come with fries?
<kymscrazy> I want a chocolate shake with mine.
<Foenix> I just want no lettuce.
* GeekRyuu (Ryuu@12.5.124.207) has joined #subcafe
<GeekRyuu> Hi!
<GeekRyuu> How is every little thing?
<Foenix> We were just talking about supersizing them.
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Quote: 394279; Rating: -63; [+|-]
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(long conversation about a problem goes here)
<Yttak> So, what you want me to do now ? It still doesnt work !!!
<TheMTZ> ok - i got the ultimate solution for you now - it will solve it 100 pct.
<Yttak> Cool, tell me !
<TheMTZ> Unplug all the cords, put the PC back into the box and bring it back to where you bought it.
<Yttak> You mean its broken ? What should i tell them when they ask ?
<TheMTZ> Tell them you are too god damn stupid to own a computer and get the money back.
* Quits: Yttak (Yttak@xxx.xxx.xxx.xxx)
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Quote: 394302; Rating: -25; [+|-]
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Ross81: my fingers smell like pussy for some reason
Battlepoet: uh
Ross81: I wonder if mcdonalds has added different spices to their friends and mcnuggets
Battlepoet: o.0
Ross81: fries rather
Battlepoet: good thing I've got wendy's coming instead
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Quote: 394480; Rating: 1086; [+|-]
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<@NeoMinder> Hey cloud! Get off my you!
<nightrunner> You ate paint chips as a kid, didn't you?
<@NeoMinder> you mean wall candy?
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Quote: 394892; Rating: 883; [+|-]
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* Quits: FuTar0 (Quit: and /part were sitting in a tree and /part fell off, who was left?)
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Quote: 394935; Rating: 452; [+|-]
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<ThaNoise> you know i saw something funny last night. an asian guy wearing a jerry rice jersey. was it wrong of me to laugh at an asian persion with "RICE" printed on the back of his shirt?
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Quote: 395195; Rating: 760; [+|-]
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<_dk-> I just grabbed a couple pretzels and sat down at the computer... I bit in to one and realized that not only was it stale, but I wasn't really all that hungry to begin with. But I was too lazy to get up and toss them in the trash, so I ate them anyway... I wonder just how many of the Seven Deadly Sins that
qualifies me for...
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Quote: 395262; Rating: 618; [+|-]
|
krlgol2: Microsoft has also managed to upset women and entire countries. A Spanish-language version of Windows XP, destined for Latin American markets, asked users to select their gender between "not specified," "male" or "bitch," because of an unfortunate error in translation.
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Quote: 395507; Rating: 124; [+|-]
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<chewy> has anybody an idea where to get torrents of german simpsons episodes?
<Whacko> germany
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Quote: 395527; Rating: 552; [+|-]
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<Revolution_Man> I want to be launched out of my coffin at my funeral.
<RandomMan> hahah
<Inferno> Liar.
<Revolution_Man> With a tape recording attached to the body saying "I'M STILL ALIVE, CATCH ME!"
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Quote: 395528; Rating: 537; [+|-]
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(@[UGP]SirSteam) ITS ALL FUCKING FUNNY TIL YOU ARE MARRIED
(@[UGP]SirSteam) THEN THE LAUGHTER FUCKING ENDS GENTLEMEN
(@[UGP]SirSteam) BE WARNED
(@[UGP]SirSteam) oh hi honey i was just talkin to the gu
?? quit: ([UGP]SirSteam) (~ssmith@SirScoots.user.gamesnet) (Read error: EOF from client)
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Quote: 395577; Rating: 133; [+|-]
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Iridium24: well my lady friend seemed excited to get my number so we'll see
DogmaticLaw99: lol
DogmaticLaw99: see what she looks like when youre sober
Iridium24: i was DD friday night
DogmaticLaw99: ahh
Iridium24: but i totally know what you mean
Iridium24: a year ago feb when i had just turned 21
Iridium24: omg i dont know what the fuck i was thinking
Iridium24: she had this GIANT birth mark across her face
DogmaticLaw99: lol
Iridium24: i didnt notice until i called her up the next day and i picked her up for a date
Iridium24: i almost went "holy shit what happened to your face!"
Iridium24: and then i saw some pictures and she has clearly had it all her life
Iridium24: i was like omg, how many drinks did i have last night!
DogmaticLaw99: thats sad bro
Iridium24: In conclusion i go to dance clubs sober now
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Quote: 395596; Rating: 807; [+|-]
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<Beta> WTF is an Acronym ?
<Zethy> yes it is...
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|
Quote: 395602; Rating: 261; [+|-]
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<Kingsford> who is Psytrox?
<Turori> rejis's date
<Kingsford> an IRC date?
<Cockbill_Street> right
<Kingsford> you guys should go to #movies
<Kingsford> and then, out to #dinner
<Kingsford> and later, #backseatofthecar
<Rejistania> Are you implying that I should get a life?
<Cockbill_Street> you've found that out on your own. ;)
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Quote: 395607; Rating: 375; [+|-]
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DaLady Firestorm: and drinking my tea
Laketh 69: teabag?
DaLady Firestorm: I like tea
DaLady Firestorm: and yes, there is a tea bag in my drink right now
Laketh 69: lol
DaLady Firestorm: why do you ask
Laketh 69: .......
Laketh 69: teabag ;(
DaLady Firestorm: do I want to know
DaLady Firestorm: what's the fixation with teabag
Laketh 69: is when you stick your balls into a girls mouth
DaLady Firestorm: did you have a pet tebag...
DaLady Firestorm: ...ah...
DaLady Firestorm: okay, that explains it
DaLady Firestorm: ew...
Laketh 69: duh
Laketh 69: and u like teabags
DaLady Firestorm: I like tea
DaLady Firestorm: not the bags
DaLady Firestorm: or sacs
DaLady Firestorm: or whatever
Laketh 69: the bags make the tea
DaLady Firestorm: I like what comes out of the tea bags
DaLady Firestorm: oh, wait a second
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Quote: 395623; Rating: 254; [+|-]
|
<Kanako> That's right kids. Unlike most of the Linux solutions out there, Cinelerra requires no emulation of proprietary operating systems, no commercial add-ons, no banner advertizements, no corporate dependancies, no terrorists, just pure, raw, hot blooded Linux boxes.
<Kanako> ^--- It does, however, require walking through hell, fighting Satan himself, and saving the princess in the other room.
<Neo1337> Just to find out the princess is in another castle...
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Quote: 395624; Rating: 359; [+|-]
|
<mowgli> Nicolai why are your faces allways backwards?
<Nicolai> what? ._o
<Mertek> He's european. It seems like everyone I've ever met from Europe has used backwards smileys.
<Mertek> There's no other way to do D: though.
<mowgli> : D
<Spazmo> :D != D:
<Spazmo> I got laid :D She had herpes D:
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Quote: 395631; Rating: 128; [+|-]
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omg omg wtf n00b: y'know what's hilarious?
omg omg wtf n00b: when people boast about what they do on the internet
omg omg wtf n00b: "omg im so drunk right now i had like 20 captain morgans"
omg omg wtf n00b: and "omg im gonna get laid tonight its gonna be amazing"
Americandude23: yeah. thats why i dont use irc.
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Quote: 395648; Rating: 187; [+|-]
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IAmOsomo4000: now who is stupid or non intellegeint now
|
|
Quote: 395652; Rating: 147; [+|-]
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DClick: I don't want your goddamn penis pills! I don't even have a penis!
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Quote: 395656; Rating: 241; [+|-]
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* nickname has joined #mp3friendschat
<nickname> word
<+bobbbit10> excel?
<+Davman> rofl
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