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Quote: 21145; Rating: 0; [+|-]
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<l0wkey> im under house arrest
<l0wkey> for two years
<_INTRA_> what did ya do?
<l0wkey> some bullshit stalking charges
<l0wkey> 32 convictions
<l0wkey> 104 trials
<_INTRA_> lowkey: u are so full of shit
<l0wkey> that is what the judge said
<l0wkey> i was caught stalking her...i said i wanted to talk to her about the case
<l0wkey> i was caught at 2:00 am, 16 times
<l0wkey> in a row
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Quote: 21147; Rating: 23; [+|-]
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<soimafrea> missing a that i think blood
<BloodNose> ?
<soimafrea> you dont know THAT much about me to tell
<blender> what blood said works fine
<soimafrea> i know but the grahmmer was appouling .
<blender> bahaha
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Quote: 21154; Rating: 1245; [+|-]
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<NickBlasta> asl?
<Cryph> unf?
<NickBlasta> no
<NickBlasta> asl
<Cryph> unf?
<NickBlasta> u want the cyber
<NickBlasta> ?
<Cryph> unf!
<NickBlasta> fap fap
<[H]Klypr8> parlor.asf
<[H]Tongboy> lol, I come back for a minute on accident, and I see what looks like 2 aolers trying to mate
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Quote: 21163; Rating: 329; [+|-]
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<R0SC0E> i bought this returned 60 gig hard drive this weekend
<R0SC0E> thinking they probably just didn't know how to install it
<R0SC0E> and it'd be fine
<ScumDog> cheap or something?
<R0SC0E> and it turned out to be an old 20 gig drive with the label swapped
<R0SC0E> yeah
<R0SC0E> but the fuckwad left all his old files on it
<R0SC0E> so i have his name, address, phone number, fax number, e-mail
<R0SC0E> i e-mailed him and was like you dumbshit
<R0SC0E> he e-mailed back and was like i uh sell computer parts so once it leaves my hands i don't know what people do with their stuff
<R0SC0E> i was like what the fuck does that mean, why would someone take a 20 gig drive you sold, and put all of these letters to lawyers with your return address on them
<R0SC0E> and call their windows username your name
<R0SC0E> no reply after that
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Quote: 21167; Rating: 13; [+|-]
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[ +vampyriclust ] what is it about vanilla coke that makes me piss like a bitch with a urine fetish?
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Quote: 21168; Rating: 276; [+|-]
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<DC> like i had this pet duck one time
<DC> he was the biggest fuck up ever
<DC> and he was such an asshole to me
<DC> and i would be like "come here quacker"
<DC> hmm maybe he was pissed because i named him quacker
<DC> yeah thats got to be it
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Quote: 21169; Rating: 203; [+|-]
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*** ChanServ sets mode: +o aen
<aen> aen's access level grew 3 sizes that day.
<aen> And the minute his heart didn't feel quite so tight,
<bob3d> the ladies were rather pleased
<aen> He whizzed with his load through the bright morning light
<aen> ANd he brought back the toys! And the food for the feast!
<aen> And he...
<aen> ...HE HIMSELF...!
<aen> aen spanked his own meat!
<aen> Or something.
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Quote: 21172; Rating: 108; [+|-]
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<Petruchio> You know... if Disney had named their new movie Lilo & Patch, I'd probably have gone to see it.
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Quote: 21184; Rating: 545; [+|-]
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<phoena>: I made the mistake of sending my husband to the store. He bought a case of Froot Loops. Fourteen boxes. I don't hate Froot Loops now, but I think I will 14 boxes from now.
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Quote: 21200; Rating: 1545; [+|-]
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* Jeff challenges fastpak to a jousting match at high noon
<fastpak> shit. I..uh...my horse is..uh...nonexistant.
<fastpak> so i guess i'll have to decline
<FlyNavy> you have to understand that when Jeff says "jousting" he really means gay sex
<FlyNavy> and when he says "wanna play a round of WC3?"
<FlyNavy> he also means gay sex
<Jeff> ...
<FlyNavy> pretty much anything he says boils down to gay sex
<FlyNavy> :D
<Jeff> want to have some gay sex?
<Tektronic> sorry dont have cs installed jeff
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Quote: 21202; Rating: 697; [+|-]
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e l i t e m r p: http://www.worldpowers.net/canada/
reverend ine: 404
e l i t e m r p: yea =)
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Quote: 21217; Rating: 221; [+|-]
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<SVJ-FuNiOnZ> man this sucks
<SVJ-FuNiOnZ> i got new deoderant and it smells like my grandpas cologne
<SVJ-FuNiOnZ> so i cant jackoff without seeing a mental image of my grandpa
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Quote: 21220; Rating: 247; [+|-]
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<darkdawg> bout how long till you can check my box out?
<Trolan> no clue. this shouldn't be taking me this long, excpet the guy who coded it needs to be shot.
<Trolan> and otherwise, try an OB/GYN
<darkdawg> ob/gyn? type that as root?
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Quote: 21221; Rating: 290; [+|-]
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<DarkDawg> hrm
<DarkDawg> somethign doesn;t seem right...
<Xplosive> the spelling of 'something' and 'doesn't'?
<fukdis> ahahaha
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Quote: 21236; Rating: 931; [+|-]
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*** Perz has joined #dorkydungeon
<Perz> YES!!!!!
<Perz> FINALLY CABLE!!!!!!!
<Perz> NO MORE GOD DAMN DISCONNECTS BECAUSE OF MY FUCKING MODEM!!!!1
<TormenT> yay :D
*** Perz has quit IRC (Ping timeout)
<TromenT> lol
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Quote: 21255; Rating: 570; [+|-]
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<+elf> hey
<Dekar> Do you want to see my cool thing?
<Dekar> It's shiny...
<Dekar> It has all sorts of moving parts.
<Dekar> And it does things. Cool things.
<+elf> zip up your pants, I don't care if you spray painted your penis.
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Quote: 21277; Rating: 1923; [+|-]
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<Mercy> It's (assassinate the president) fun to annoy (charter a plane, pentagon) the NSA by (shoot George Bush) inserting crap into innocent (blow up congress) sentences.
<Mercy> Or so I've been (nuke Washington) told.
<@Ixnorp> One would think that the NSA would have slightly more advanced filtering techniques than regexp.
* Mercy Quit (Ping timeout)
<@Ixnorp> Or maybe not.
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Quote: 21282; Rating: 416; [+|-]
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<ChugChug> so like... uhh.. what language do you use?
<LaC> english
<ChugChug> is that like perl? :)
<LaC> god i hope not
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Quote: 21292; Rating: 169; [+|-]
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<RatBreath> almost half a terabyte of copyrighted material... amazing. you are a god
<Rzrshrp60> well most of it is vids of isajeeps mom on the strip
<Efflixi> lol
<Rzrshrp60> ...high quality
<isajeep> wtf
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Quote: 21309; Rating: 317; [+|-]
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<ilde> Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
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Quote: 21316; Rating: 420; [+|-]
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<@JackPott> JACK POTT
<@JackPott> IN TEH MORNING
<@JackPott> ON TEH RADIO
<@JackPott> TOMORROW LIEK
<@GingaNutz> nice abuse of the english language
<+Oz> abuse is an understatement
<+Oz> more like "flagellation followed by intense anal rape by at least seven well-endowed males, two goats and one horse, in turn followed by an intragenital injection of H2SO4"
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Quote: 21346; Rating: 478; [+|-]
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<ChaB`s> Santa Claus hates you.
<LordReavr> he doesn't, he gives me presents.
<ChaB`s> no he doesn't.
<ChaB`s> that's not santa at all.
<LordReavr> you're just jealous because all you get is lumps of coal.
<ChaB`s> hey, I'm prepared for an energy crisis, man
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Quote: 21354; Rating: 1673; [+|-]
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<Beerman> I demand random linkage! link me to strange things, and entertain me
<tate> http://www.goatse.cx/
<ecs> i was just gunna say that...
<Beerman> my word, whats wrong with that mans bottom?
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Quote: 21363; Rating: 57; [+|-]
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<EvILEyE{GF}> I tried getting my scanner to work
<EvILEyE{GF}> stupid prick machine doesn't work with win2k
<EvILEyE{GF}> only works with linux, OSX, and pre-winME OS's (drivers)
<EvILEyE{GF}> so I tried it on my laptop and linux broke
<EvILEyE{GF}> so I tried installing win98 on it
<EvILEyE{GF}> win98 broke
<EvILEyE{GF}> it's outside on the front lawn now
<EvILEyE{GF}> I figured I could format the hard drive by throwing it out the window
<Kaown> It'd leave a footprint on the ground, but that's about all.
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Quote: 21365; Rating: 278; [+|-]
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*** cade changes topic to: 'its my mcdonalds, ill play in the ball pen if i FUCKING WANT'
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Quote: 21390; Rating: 13; [+|-]
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<terrance?>: have you read the LOTR books
<stratusxh>: no, however, i have them, and i'm considering reading them before school
<stratusxh>: dunno though
<stratusxh>: that boost of geekness may well keep me from getting laid for a couple weeks after reading them
<stratusxh>: i sure as hell know the Harry Potter books did that
<terrance?>: fuck harry potter
<stratusxh>: fuck harry potter? fuck your taste in literature
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Quote: 21418; Rating: 89; [+|-]
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(h0va) i could fill any IT job now.. and do well.. from my home computer
experiance.. but i would never get hired cuz i have no credentials
(cranky) h0va: dude you couldn't fill a toilet bowl
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Quote: 21441; Rating: 154; [+|-]
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<Kaze_Shinmen> Not that I am homosexual. I just like toting rainbow colored girly things.
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Quote: 21455; Rating: 151; [+|-]
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<Chikster> Oh wow ur little comments can go fuck a goat.
<Chikster> LoL
<Chikster> now that i read what i said i see where u got that.
<BadCaleb> i'd pay to see that.. i can't explain why, though
<nyisles> text on a computer screen can't exactly have sex with a goat...
<Chikster> well..true
<Chikster> but someday
<BadCaleb> in aperfect world.. words will roam around, fucking all sorts of animals
<BadCaleb> but not mine..
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Quote: 21516; Rating: 12686; [+|-]
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<turno> I want to fuck Michelle's brains out with my huge fucking cock, over and over again .. and then her sister can come and join us too.
<Seeker> Err turno, your mom reads the quotes on bash.org?
<turno> I'll fucking KILL YOU! !
<Seeker> Your mom does work for the church ? If she reads what you just said she'd be pretty angry right?
<turno> Dude you have no fucking clue, don't seriously... you'd be ruining my life.
<Seeker> Don't worry, I won't post it.
[Privmsg] <Seeker> Hey dude, I'm gonna paste something - will you post it on bash.org?
[Privmsg] <opiate> the turno thing? haha you fucking bastard!!
[Privmsg] <Seeker> hehe his mom's gonna fucking kill him, drag him to that church they go to and get the priest to sodomise him.
[Privmsg] <opiate> yeah and then he's gonna come fucking kill us, still I reckon it's worth it;)
[Privmsg] <turno> You're not gonna post it are you ? Please don't .. I'm begging you.
[Privmsg] <Seeker> I'm not gonna post it:) and even if I did she'd never know that your nick turno was her son Michael Savu .
[Privmsg] <turno> *phew* spose you have a point
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Quote: 21521; Rating: 283; [+|-]
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<@Kyoushu_Yatou> Hey Saka, or Paul.. someone.. I need a boy
<@Kyoushu_Yatou> bot
<@Kyoushu_Yatou> **
<@Kyoushu_Yatou> >_<
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Quote: 21667; Rating: 216; [+|-]
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<TheWoland> If anyone molests me while I'm gone, take some pictures for my website
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Quote: 21668; Rating: 136; [+|-]
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<Disciple> i'd give head to a guy before I'd kiss him
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Quote: 21680; Rating: 526; [+|-]
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<ic3m4n> i have 6 usb ports
<c00l_zero> what for??
<ic3m4n> modem, mouse, webcam, scanner, printer and 1 just in case...
<ic3m4n> i was trying to find the modem one...
*** ic3m4n has quit IRC: (Connection reset by peer.)
*** ic3m4n has joined #cad
<ic3m4n> yep, that was the one...
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Quote: 21699; Rating: 423; [+|-]
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<Rasterburn> Is there a way to split a file at a specific byte?
<0dan0> no
<0dan0> unless you are using a "computer"
<0dan0> then it can be done
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Quote: 21713; Rating: 269; [+|-]
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<the-low> it saddens me to see a lady that i love, such as an adult film star, take a cum shot in the face
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Quote: 21722; Rating: 419; [+|-]
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<@GameBot> 186. Why is the sky blue?
<Anima-> prism
<@GameBot> Here's a hint: The colour wavel***** ** **** ** ******* **** *** ***** *******
<Anima-> :(
<Anima-> haha
<infinitySPZ> ..........
<Serimestari> yyyyyeah.......
<infinitySPZ> This is why some questions shouldn't get into trivia
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Quote: 21725; Rating: 20; [+|-]
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<@GameBot> 206. What is the name of the most southerly village in mainland Britain?
<Serimestari> scottland
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Quote: 21732; Rating: 382; [+|-]
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* Zibzib hees. "go tahoe" -> "gotahoe.com" <-- Worst URL Faux Pas Ever
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Quote: 21742; Rating: 409; [+|-]
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<Darkness9> *wonders how many girls he could fit in a back seat of a car*
<Zibzibzib> depends.. if you're in the car, none
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Quote: 21756; Rating: 392; [+|-]
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<Stiffler> How's it going.
<FlyNavy> eh
<FlyNavy> been better
<FlyNavy> pretty much out of resin to smoke...
<FlyNavy> and I still don't have:
<FlyNavy> a job
<FlyNavy> a car
<FlyNavy> money
<FlyNavy> weed
<FlyNavy> or pussy
<Stiffler> So basically...
<Stiffler> It's all the same.
<Stiffler> ROFL
<FlyNavy> I need a job so I can get a car so I can have money to buy weed
<FlyNavy> which I'll then use to get pussy
<Stiffler> Indeed
<FlyNavy> which'll then need to be maintained by a job
<FlyNavy> which to get I'll need a car
<FlyNavy> and for that I need money
<Stiffler> But you see, you first need the pussy to get the weed to get the money to get the car to the job..
<FlyNavy> so I could try selling weed
<FlyNavy> :D
<FlyNavy> exactly...if I had some pussy, she could tell me where to get weed to I could sell it to buy a car to get a job to maintin the pussy that I'll get with weed which I'll buy with money left over from buying a car that I earned at my job
<Stiffler> Indeed
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Quote: 21761; Rating: 136; [+|-]
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<JesusGink> ;D
<JesusGink> er
<JesusGink> :D
<JesusGink> hard to take off bra and hit shift-; at the same time
<tabbyfoo> lol
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Quote: 21768; Rating: 326; [+|-]
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<RageRules> Well I have woots Ip address
<RageRules> That's cool
<%mrWoot> hack me?
<RageRules> Why not?
<%mrWoot> how dare you
<RageRules> Give me 43 and a half reasons why I shouldn't
<POLKA> rage, ill give you 1
<POLKA> because you cant
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Quote: 21778; Rating: 728; [+|-]
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votewithabullet8: so whats up?
votewithabullet8: today better than yestderday?
cochese04: not really
cochese04: tonight I drank a big ol' glass of milk
cochese04: then I remembered I'm lactose intolerant
cochese04: that's an "oh fuck" moment
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Quote: 21781; Rating: 461; [+|-]
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<worldspawn> <-- so gay
<worldspawn> FUCK
<worldspawn> wait
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Quote: 21782; Rating: 7; [+|-]
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<Wingar> so what now
<DIV|Kulite> Well I'm gonna go jerk it
<Eficent-W-> I may go find something to snack on
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Quote: 21783; Rating: 130; [+|-]
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<isajeep> I was waiting for a call from one earlier, and I fell asleep next to my server and had a nightmare about my computer
<isajeep> an dI missed the call
<NickBlasta> what was it about?
<isajeep> im not joking...its actually really pathetic
<isajeep> I had a dream my mother was tring to run coax cable inside my comp to get better reception
<RatBreath> sweeeet
<benutne> thats horrible
<RatBreath> isa, you should be shot for that dream
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Quote: 21784; Rating: 311; [+|-]
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<user> uhhh.
<IJ> Hi.
<user> hi. I'm still having problems with the akick.
<IJ> On which channel?
<user> I was opped, then I got disconnected, and now my ghost just permbanned me.
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Quote: 21787; Rating: 1435; [+|-]
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*** Chimerasame is now known as MissScarlet
<Foxworth> ...
<Foxworth> must...
<Foxworth> resist...
<Foxworth> urge...
*** Foxworth is now known as MrGreen
*** Signoff: MissScarlet (Killed (MrGreen (in the ballroom with the knife)))
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Quote: 21788; Rating: 2589; [+|-]
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<niceboy19> i'm german
<Evilbert-> don't worry i won't mention the war
<niceboy19> what do you mean with that
<niceboy19> you just mentioned it
<Evilbert-> you started it
<niceboy19> i didn't
<Evilbert-> Yes you did! You invaded Poland!
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